2006-10-16 03:41:28 · 15 answers · asked by Kiki 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Grade-Schooler
More details please . Age,sex,medical problems etc. I have and still do deal with this issue. First, do not give in. Whatever punishment you choose or threaten to use, DO IT. You are the adult and never let that be an issue. As long as you are not beating the child, make the next punishment worse. Fully explain the situation to the child. '' If you do this, then this is what happens. If it happens again, then it will get worse. '' Make it very clear what is expected . But also, do not dwell on the bad. If the child is doing something that you like, let them know. And do not drill on everything. Sometimes , little things might be acceptable. It is not BOOT CAMP, it's life. If the child is as bad as you say, hard to tell from one sentence, and you really have tried everything, then it is entirely possible that some kind of a behavior problem ( medical ) does exist and you need to seek professional help.
I didn't give details on fixes. We have 4 kids. We use the time-outs often. Also taking something away, a sleepover, tv,snacks,a toy.....something to get their attention. Do not give in !! If it is something really special, like tickets to a ball game or concert, you might give 1 extra warning, like stop or I will take those tickets away. As long as they know the consequences of their actions you HAVE TO STICK to your guns, no matter how much it kills you. Spank as a last resort. I can think of a few occasions, not many, when one of my twin 11 yr old girls was mouthing off and we smacked them in the face. No, it wasn't hard, but it got their attention. Corporal punishment is taboo now a days, but it was sure effective when I was younger.'' Wait until your father gets home '' were words I never wanted to hear.
2006-10-17 03:59:37 · answer #1 · answered by rock d 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Oh my understand your frustration!! and they do grow!
Do what you can as a parent ! You have to realize this child has his/her own mind and will fight you tooth and nail. You are not a failure this is how this child was born. We want to protect our children, sometimes we just have to say "we did the best we could".
Good luck with your child. My defiant independent child is as he says "all grown up", just don't give up on your child and make sure your child knows you are there for him/her. Lots of bumps in the road for children like this.....
2006-10-16 10:49:16 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
To me that is the sign of a smart child. The key is to going along with what they want to do and see if it helps. They act out and become defiant cuz they are progressed in their mind and moms tend to keep them as babies. Independence is welcomed and it will bring you closer. Not every thing can be on his own and he will realize that and ask for your help.
does that make sense?
2006-10-16 10:48:19 · answer #3 · answered by wingedladyk 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Set boundaries and the expectation for them to be followed. If you haven't been setting boundaries or dished out consequences with your child in the past, then expect there to be a fight in the beginning of you implementing new rules. BUT, it is worth it. Any training is hard, but when you get through it there are many rewards. the bible says, "do not spare the rod, your child will not die." You don't want your child to disgrace you in front of others, and better yet, you don't want your child to be a menace to society. Train your child from now. Also, watch NANNY 911. Good show!
2006-10-16 12:42:49 · answer #4 · answered by Song 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My daughter whos 7 is also very independant and strong willed. You have to be consistant with what is expected and what will be tolerated. You can not back down on whatever your discipline choice. Just remember that these children tend to grow up being confident adults, leaders not followers. Be sure to him the right guidence! Good luck and embrace your child for who they are!
2006-10-16 12:23:18 · answer #5 · answered by Sally C 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
depends how old?
i was like that, something is wrong if it's been happening since the child was school-age? Or did it just happen in teens?
usually means that are going to be great grown-ups
2006-10-16 10:46:07 · answer #6 · answered by Diana 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The discipline has to start from the beginning. Way too many parents take all they can take and then crack and want to discipline the child. Early and consistent is the key....
2006-10-16 10:47:31 · answer #7 · answered by louwho 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
give the child there independence and imanapacte them and kick them out of your house to live on there own. if they want to be free let them go you must have done something right to make them think they are grown.
2006-10-16 10:49:25 · answer #8 · answered by besos 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's how my son is... but, he is much better now. Grounding didn't work, spanking didn't work and I didn't like doing it, taking away things didn't work.... scrubbing the bathroom floor with a toothbrush every time he didn't listen.....THAT is what works. And if he's having a bad day and driving me up the wall, at least my floors are spotless.
2006-10-16 12:17:02 · answer #9 · answered by raven_roycroft 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
change the childs diet. Have a look at www.fedup.com.au
2006-10-17 00:07:52 · answer #10 · answered by deedee 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋