does anyone know sum' BAD' jokes?

Question

bad in the sense u know ..................

pls do tell i m the mood 4 jokes

Answer 1

1. How Do You Catch a Unique Rabbit?
-Unique Up On It.

2. How Do You Catch a Tame Rabbit?
-Tame Way, Unique Up On It.

3. How Do Crazy People Go Through The Forest ?
-They Take The Psycho Path

4. How Do You Get Holy Water?
- You Boil The Hell Out Of It.

5. What Do Fish Say When They Hit a Concrete Wall?
- Dam!

6. What Do Eskimos Get From Sitting On The Ice too Long?
-Polaroid's

7. What Do You Call a Boomerang That Doesn't work?
-A Stick

8. What Do You Call Cheese That Isn't Yours?
-Nacho Cheese.

9.. What Do You Call Santa's Helpers?
-Subordinate Clauses.

10. What Do You Call Four Bullfighters In Quicksand?
-Quattro Sinko..

11. What Do You Get From a Pampered Cow?
-Spoiled Milk.

12. What Do You Get When You Cross a Snowman With a Vampire?
-Frostbite.

13. What Lies At
The Bottom Of The Ocean And Twitches?
-A Nervous Wreck.

14. What's The Difference Between Roast Beef And Pea Soup?
-Anyone Can Roast Beef. Can you pea soup?

15. Where Do You Find a Dog With No Legs?
-Right Where You Left Him.

16. Why Do Gorillas Have Big Nostrils?
-Because They Have Big Fingers.

17. Why Don't Blind People Like To Sky Dive?
-Because It Scares The Dog

18. What Kind Of Coffee Was Served On The Titanic?
-Sanka.

19. What Is The Difference Between a Harley And a Hoover ?
- The Location Of The Dirt Bag.

20. Why Did Pilgrims' Pants Always Fall Down?
-Because They Wore Their Belt Buckle On Their Hat.

21. What's The Difference Between a Bad Golfer And a Bad Skydiver?
-A Bad Golfer Goes, Whack, Dang!
A Bad Skydiver Goes Dang! Whack.

22. How Are a Texas Tornado And a Tennessee Divorce The Same?
- Somebody's Gonna Lose A Trailer

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~...
Q) Whats the best way to cover a cushion?
A) Sit on it.

Q) What do you call a child that eats its parents?
A) An orphan

Q) Whats the difference between a blonde and a shopping trolley?
A) The trolley has a mind of its own

Q) How many flies does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A) Only two...but how did they get in there!!!

Q) If you throw a blue bucket into the Red Sea, what does it become?
A) Wet

Q) What did the farmer say when he saw a cow on his roof?
A) Get down
Q) What did the cow say?
A) Moo

Q) Whats green, has six legs and if it jumps out of a tree will kill you?
A) A pool table

Q) What has six wheels and flies?
A) A garbage truck

Q) Why did the koala fall out of the tree?
A) It was dead

Q) Why did the second koala fall out of the tree?
A) It was stapled to the first
one

Q) Why did the third koala fall out of the tree?
A) Got hit by the other two on their way down.

These will do ya.

Answer 2

One day a young cowboy and cowgirl decided to get married. He was a man of the world. She was an innocent bride with no experience.

After the wedding they left for their honeymoon. While driving down the road, the new bride sees two cows having sex. She asks, "What are them cows up to honey?"

The husband, a bit flustered, answers, "Why can't you see? Them cows, they're roping!"

She replies, "Oh, I see!"

After a few more hours of driving they pass two horses having sex.

Again the bride asks, "What are them horses doing honey?"

The husband answers again, "Them horses, they're roping!"

She replies, "Oh, I see!"

Finally they arrive at their hotel. The couple washed up and started to get ready for bed. When they got in the bed, they start to explore each other's bodies. Things are going along fine until the bride discovers her husband's penis.

"Oh my!" she cries, "What is that?"

"Well, darling'" he chuckles proudly, "That's my rope!"

She slides her hands down further and gasps, "Oh my goodness! What are those?" she asks.

"Honey, those're my knots!" he answers.

Finally the couple begins to make love. After several minutes the bride says, "Stop honey, wait a minute!"

Her husband, panting a little, asks, "What's the matter honey, am I hurting you?"

"No," the bride replies, "undo them damn knots, I need more rope!"


Q: Who's senior: Penis or Vagina?
A: Vagina, because penis always stands up in its honour

Skoda recently launched a new car model LAURA. All drivers are having a tough time when theor Memsahibs say: Driver Laura Nikalo!

What is Long & Hard, has a hole at the tip and when u insert it into a wet, hairy & tight hole makes u feel better?
Vicks Inhaler


What is invisible sex?
A male Negro ******* a female Negro under moonless night in a coal mine wearing a black condom.

A friend like u is not like boobs coz everyone sucks them. Not like vagina coz it tears. You r like a penis coz it always stands when needed.

Man: Kiss Karun?
Gal: Lipstick kharab hogi.
Man: Boob dabaun.?
Gal: T-shirt kharab hogi.?
Man: ****?
Gal: Period me hun.?
Man: Don't say loose motions hai.


Little Girl: Mom, I just found out that the boy next door has a penis like a peanut.
Mommy: U mean it's small?
Little Girl: No, it's salty.

3 Facts of Life:
Garib aur Boobs hamesha dabte hai.
Musibat aur penis kabhi bhi khade ho jate hai.
Kismat aur Bra kabhi bhi khul sakti hai.

A ******* is the only job in the world that can't be included in your resume despite years of experience and a number of refrences!

Bio teacher: Girls, the size of a penis should be 6 inches for successful penetration.
Girl: Mam, how about 9 inches?
Teacher: I was talking of necessity not luxury.

Answer 3

Once a lady told her servant to bring a silk cloth from a nearby shop without tearing it so that she could make a blouse, but the servant tore it. The lady bieng kind forgave him .The other day she told him to bring chicoos from the market without pressingthem,but the servant pressed it.Again she forgave him.The next day she told him to bring 2 litres of milk from the diary without drinking it but the servant brought home drinking the milk.This time she was angry , she went to the police station and told the police,"this man tore my blouse ,pressed the chicoos and drank the milk".[I hope u understood this joke!]

Answer 4

2 adult males are in a bar. One says to the different, "So how's your sex life?" "no longer too solid” his buddy solutions “each and every time we've sex, she loses activity 0.5-way by ability of. this is totally problematical." the first guy says, "i comprehend what you advise. I used to have a similar subject, yet i found a treatment. I hid a starter pistol below the mattress. at the same time as she began to expire of steam, I in basic terms fired the starter pistol. It gave her any such wonder that she were given all excited, and couldn't get sufficient. I desire i might want to carried out it years in the past!" “truly?” says his buddy “i imagine i am going to attempt that." the subsequent day they’re decrease back in the bar back. the first guy says, "How did it flow with the starter pistol?" “poor!” replies his buddy "i purchased the pistol, went instantly residing house and we got down to performing some sixty 9. As favourite, she lost activity 0.5 way by ability of, so I fired the bloody starter pistol, in basic terms like you suggested." “So??” the first guy says, “What handed off?" “What handed off?!!” says his buddy “She bit my ****, sh*t on my face, and a unadorned bloke got here out of the dresser mutually with his hands up!"

Answer 5

Try my QA you will be satisfied for ever around 400 of them are available

Answer 6

bad is a kind of vulgar joke may be

Answer 7

Two kids talking to each other.
First; I know how a child is born.
Second: Oh! I also know how a child is not born.

Answer 8

the child (daughter)of 6 months was crying so father of child told to his wife that make child quite so she replied that he's not only mine some part belongs to u also husband replied yours part is crying

Answer 9

So, a guy walks into a bar...






Ouch!




What do you call the skin around the vagina?






The woman!

Answer 10

I know a lot, but its Ramadan so I can't right now. lol.

come back in a week.