I had to go.......stitches?

Question

I had to take my 2 year old to the ER. She needed stitches, she was playing by the door at a cafe and someone walked in and her finger got pinched. It was cut pretty bad and needed stitches. I can't seem to get over the gulit that she got hurt and that I was so close to her!
I turned my back for 2 min. to pay. I keep thinking of all the things I could have done different. How does one deal with the gulit?

Answer 1

Awww.... sorry to hear that. I guess you just have to do the best you can --there's no re-wind button. I'm sure you don't blame your mother for the boo-boo's you got as a child, right? To a certain degree, these things just teach our children the dangers getting pinched in a door or whatever it is.... they need to discover the of the world by themselves and you just need to be there and give them the freedom to explore their world and to pick up the pieces sometimes --kiss it and go on. Weigh it with all the wonderful things you've done for your daughter. The scales will usually balance!

Answer 2

Babies will get bumped and scraped and bruised--no matter how close you are. Last week I watched my one year old walk right into the table and ended up with a HUGE 'egg' on his head. I was two feet from him, but not fast enough and I watched it happen. They will get their bumps and bruises. Just remember that you can't prevent every accident from happening--sometimes you can only make them feel better. That doesn't make you a bad mom--a bad mom would be the one screaming at her kid--telling the child it 'served them right' for doing something they didn't know could hurt them. It'll get better mommy! We've all been there and done things we've felt guilty over!

I won't even tell you about the time my then three year old touched the stove and burned off three of her finger pads....she said since the burner wasn't red, she didn't think it was hot....*sigh*...I still have pangs of guilt on that one--but I can guarantee you, she doesn't touch the stove anymore--and she's six!

Answer 3

Kids get hurt. You had to pay the bill- she was two and should have known to stay put by mommy. Not that she's to blame but neither are you. :) She'll be okay and she's probably learned her lesson and so have you. Fact is- kids run off and get in trouble or get hurt and there's simply nothing you can do about it. Just think of it in a different light. Try not to feel guilty because it happens. I'm sorry she got hurt so badly though... poor baby. :(

Answer 4

I had the same type of accident happen. I opened the back door of my van, making sure to check for fingers first, tossed in my bag then shut the door. In that split second of tossing in the bag my son stuck his finger right on the hinge of the door. I was able to close the door completely. My oldest son started screaming and then I realized what had happened. I rushed him to the hospital just knowing that I had cut his fingertip off. They took us right in and were able to save it. He had 25 little tiny stitches in his fingertip. The doctor did an amazing job. My son was so brave through out the whole ordeal. he kept asking me if she was going to fix it. I kept reassuring him that she was. His bravery still amazes me to this day. He will never forget what I did (he reminds me at least once a month HA HA HA) but after months of guilt, I have gotten over it. Kids are resilient, more than we realize. Just give her a little extra love and kisses and she'll be fine.

Answer 5

This guilt doesn't belong to you at all; in reality, this is just an accident for you, your baby girl, and the stranger. Lets put it this way, even you pay attention when the stranger walk in and your baby girl didn't get hurt, can you assume that when someone from the store won't open the door when he/she leaves the cafe? Just make sure that she doesn't get infections after she got the cut, because young babies don't have much immunity systems in their bodies to fight against the viruses and germs that might infect their bodies after they got cuts.

Answer 6

We've all done this - once. It is just preparing you to avoid the worse things. It was just a learning lesson. I bet every parent has had a situation like this.

A friend had her daughter exit the bank and walk into traffic! I can't believe she told me that. Another had the dresser fall on her 3 year old because it wasn't attached to the wall. One friend gave her child a fridge magnet and the child ate it and she had to call 911. All of them are paranoid now!

Answer 7

your child getting hurt is something you are gonna have to learn to deal with because believe me kids get hurt like that all the time and that doesnt mean your a bad parent these are things that just happen. even the best parents in the world have kids that have been hurt, my son was two when he had to have stiches on his eye lid from jumpin on the couch and believe me when i say that was not our last visit to the ER dont be so hard on yourself i'm sure your a great mama.

Answer 8

As a parent, I believe that anytime one of our children gets hurt we feel some type of guilt. Two year old are very swift on their feet, next time try holding her hand while you pay, but it sounds to me that she'll be ok and in a few weeks she probably wont even remember that it happened and although you will eventually get over the guilt, you will never forget that it happened. She'll be ok and so will you.

Answer 9

Dont beat yourself up over this even the best of parents cant watch their child every second no matter how hard we try. Things will happen that are just out of our control.Just love her and enjoy every moment with her. Be thankful the situation wasnt worse.She loves you and doesnt blame you for it.There will be more bumps and bruises along the way.No parent is perfect.

Answer 10

You shouldn't feel quilty. Kids get hurt. It's just part of life. My mom slammed y fingers in door on accident and broke two of them when I was 2 yrs old. She felt bad, but people get hurt and they heal, and then have war stories to tell about thier scars.