My little brother is 15 yrs. old and my family recently found out that his girlfriend is pregnant, and has been for 3 1/2 months. I am against this and ashamed of him, but I dont want to let him know how i feel because he obviously is going through enough right now, so what do you think I should say so that he thinks im supportive of the whole situation?
2006-10-15 13:25:43 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Before I answer, I'd like to ask you...have you never done anything you regretted or anything "stupid"?
He doesn't need anyone else telling him how badly he screwed up. He knows that. What he needs is for someone (namely you) to be there for him. Siblings should always watch each others backs. Now that he's done something that will change his life forever, he needs you to lighten up (especially since I'm sure mom and dad are breathing heavy down his neck).
Tell him the truth. Tell him although you are disappointed in his actions (and how this should teach him a HUGE lesson in using a condom), you support him. Tell him how much he means to you and that you can't imagine what he's going through, but that you'll be there for him. Make sure you make it clear that he can talk to you anytime, since talking to mom and dad right now may not be much of an option for him. Let him know that he's not alone, even though he feels like it right now.
Good luck.
2006-10-15 13:46:37 · answer #1 · answered by Joy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the damage is already done. Say , I'm here for you and leave it at that. do it ONLY if you will really be there for him. As an older brother you may be able to help him mature, as he is going to have a lot of responsibility. Why are you ashamed of him? A little disappointed I could see, but not ashamed. This does not reflect on anyone else in the family. He had poor judgement, with having sex at 15, but that doesn't make him a bad person. I hope you can be there for him, he certainly needs some one to be on his side and someone he can look to for guideance. Harley
2006-10-15 13:52:25 · answer #2 · answered by harley 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You may be upset now ,but that will change. if you have a child support him by giving him hand me downs. alot of people make fun of that ,but babies are very expensive and he will need all the help he can get. you have the right idea about keeping your thoughts to yourself,he don't need the extra stress. just wait and when it blows over with your parents tell him how you feel but in a different way like" it upsets me that you didn't use protection,but what is done is done. i will be here to help you if you need it"
never ever tell him you are ashamed of him,that will hurt him more than if you puched him,don't do that either.I can think of one reason right now of why you should not be ashamed of him. he had the balls enough to come and tell you and your parents.that in its self is saying alot. also it shows he is willing to be a dad and will do what he can to raise a baby,which is hard to find men like that much less young teens. you can't just act supportive you have to be supportive,he afterall is your brother.
2006-10-15 13:40:27 · answer #3 · answered by cuervo25_1 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just be his brother and let him know you care about him and your future niece or nephew.
he is young and not prepared for what he's about to face... ( most teens allow themselves to be ruled by temporary pleasures/feelings)... now he's facing fatherhood and isn't old enough to work or have a car yet ... how are your parents dealing with their new responsibilities (becoming grandparents and dealing with their son who had unprotected sex and he is unable to provide for his own child and it's mother... they need some kindness too, put aside the shame and focus on doing what you can to make life less difficult for the baby that's coming.... if everyone can rally around these young ones with support, things will definitely go smoother than having arguments and creating a really stressful home life. Maybe some therapy for the family --- it could help.
2006-10-15 13:41:24 · answer #4 · answered by jaimestar64cross 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why would you want to lie to your brother? Do you support him or not? You have to decide if you tell him something supportive your actions are going to give you away if you dont mean it. If you do support him just let him know that you are there for him, and that you will help him in anyway you can.
2006-10-15 13:32:30 · answer #5 · answered by snoop_dougie_doug04 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
just be there for him,, yes he is way too young but what can he do know ,, its too late,,
let him talk to you about it ,, it has to be killing him to know he is a dad at his age,,
he problems has soo many questions,,
parents should support them both,, its hard enbough with out your parents turning their back on them too,,
you do have a right to feel the way you do but please be the rock he needs right now,, even his gal friend,, be there for her too,,
just let him vent is the best advice i can give you and always be there for your brother,, ,,
we all make lots of mistakes,,
2006-10-15 13:32:11 · answer #6 · answered by thanks to our brave troops, 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think you should truly be supportive, he needs all the genuine help he can get. It's not like he can "undo" the situation.
2006-10-15 13:32:51 · answer #7 · answered by janicajayne 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Who said you had to lower your standards to support an idiot brother. Tell him the truth...it always works.
2006-10-15 13:36:58 · answer #8 · answered by EchoAnn 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
just be there what is done is done nothing you can do to change it now your famliy you have to be there 4 him
2006-10-15 14:56:47 · answer #9 · answered by ashley l 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell him you'll be there for him, and mean it
2006-10-15 14:38:22 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋