I made a promise to myself ever since I was a young girl to remain a virgin til I get married, but I'm starting to question it. I'm 21 and I have not even gone past kissing. I think I'm starting to get more curious... I always get hit on by guys who think I'm beautiful and some don't even believe me when they find out I'm a virgin. I guess cuz some guys have said I have naughty eyes, big lips, and curves. I still wanna be picky with guys, my last boyfriend ended it and I think the "no sex" was probably a factor, I liked him a lot and I was hurt. Should I start to go past kissing & eventually lead to sex with the right guy or should I just save sex for marriage?
2006-10-15 13:01:38 · 30 answers · asked by sweet kisses 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
What a difficult age to be at? I am 50 years old and I still do not know what is the best answer except that I can talk from my personal opinion. I would always go for man who value a woman for the person that she is rather than her virginity; having said that, the world is full of men who will say anything inorder to get you to say yes. Once he is done, you will be a number to add onto his list of conquests and what ever he promises, he would have no memory of - of course there will be people out there that will tell me that it is not always true.
I think if a man who is really interested in you will rspect you, I can understand your curiousity but remember there is no other act that is more intimate to be sharing with another person than love making. May be the key word is 'love making' rather than 'having sex', one enhance the relationship, one degrade it into a kind of exercise.
I wish I could offer you better advise, at the meantime, tell yourself that you are worth waiting for to any man that comes along. Let your sexual experience be meaningful and joyful.
2006-10-15 13:16:54 · answer #1 · answered by Sophia J 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Trust me! You will regret breaking your own promise when you do it! These guys sound like they are willing to use you for sex. My advise to you, dont do it. I know many people that regret their wrong actions in a big way because of it. You will feel much better waiting until after marriage, when you are SURE you are with the right one! Im 15 and swore forever I will stay a virgin until then. I will never want to end up like those skanks at my school that are just "curious". They get a baaaaaad reputation. Plus, you will have to go through all the trouble of worrying about getting pregnant and buying birth control and condoms. You might as well wait for the right time with the right one. You wont regret it! Good luck, I hope you make the right decision! :):):)
2006-10-15 20:08:00 · answer #2 · answered by Autumn 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Only you can truly answer that question. I once made that same promise to myself. I made it through high school and into college. Then, I fell in love. I decided it was the right time for me. Not because of him, or some fear that he would leave me if I didn't sleep with him. I just felt like it was the right time and the right guy. It didn't end up working out, but I still do not regret my decision. It was a decision I came to. You have to listen to your own heart on this one.
As far as guys not believing it, it may not be just your looks that make them think this. Girls lose their virginity very young these days, too young if you ask me. I was nineteen and most didn't believe it, even my own grandparents.
2006-10-15 20:07:35 · answer #3 · answered by Social_D 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey sweetie,
I think you should keep your promise to yourself. If your last boyfriend left you because you didn't have sex with him, then just know that he would have left you even if you DID have sex with him. You want a guy that is going to stay with you and respect you. Since virginity is a big deal, and you will never be getting it back again, you have to think about who you want to give it to. It's very special and if you give it to the wrong person you may kick yourself for it later (And if that does happen, try not to beat yourself up over it and consider it an experience.). Like you, I'm waiting as well. I believe it's a special gift that you can share with your husband - someone who has married you and will be there for you. Someone who is caring, and obviously wasn't in the relationship just for sex. Good luck.
2006-10-15 20:07:33 · answer #4 · answered by Helloooo Nurse! 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
This is really a decision for you to make and a tough one at that. You should meet a guy and not mention to him that your a virgin, that way theres no pressure for him or you, wait until your really ready to be with him sexually if you really feel that he is right for you and that he loves you. If it is too much for him explain that you are a virgin and let him take it from there, a man is no good for you if he breaks up with you just because you wont have sex with him, i personally would think that is all he is after but if he waits a long time then he is...good luck
Follow what you think is right for you at the end of the day!
2006-10-15 20:13:14 · answer #5 · answered by hunybuny 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
that is a very good question. the best answer is do whats in your heart being a virgin is a great thing and once its gone its gone. some regret it and some don't. but when i lost my virginity it was my high school sweetheart and we later on got married. i belived in my heart we would marry so thats why i decided to give mine up because i wanted to wait til marriag aswell. i say don't wait till marriage i would hate for you to be stuck with horrible sex for the rest of your life because you didn't test him out first. find some one serious be in a realationship for some months or years then get you some girl. PRACTICE THE THREE B'S (THATS WHAT I CALL THEM) BE SAFE BE SMART BE COUSIOUS. SAFE WERE A CONDOM NO MATTER WHAT NO ONE IS EXEMPT FROM STDS NOW AND DAYS. GET TESTED REGULARLY EVEN IF YOU ARE USING CONDOMS. DON'T JUST GIVE IT UP TO ANY ONE BE PICKY BECAUSE YOUR BODY, HEART AND MIND ARE PRECIOUS AND NEED T BE PROTERCTED. BE COUSIOS OF YOUR BODY AS WELL AS HIS. ASK ABOUT ANYTHING THAT LOOKS OR FEELS UNUSUAL. HOPE YOU MAKE THE BEST CHOICE FOR YOU. I AM NOT MARRIED ANYMORE AND I HAVE HAD 4 OTHER SEX PARTNERS SINCE MY DIVORCEE. FOR ME SEX IS GREAT BUT I AM PICKY WHO I GIVE IT TO. NOW I AM IN A 2 YEAR REALTIONSHIP. ALL OF MY ENCOUNTERS HAVE BEEN RELATIONSHIPS OF 8 MONTHS OR MORE.
2006-10-15 20:11:13 · answer #6 · answered by angel 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sex is a big step in a relationship. You should be picky, and you should lose your virginity when it feels right. Curiosity about sex is completely natural. I don't think you can put a time frame on when you should have sex. When you meet the right man and want to have sex, go for it. But make sure the decision is yours and not the guy's. Good luck.
2006-10-15 20:04:45 · answer #7 · answered by jacket1996 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Save it. One day you will look back and be ever so grateful that you did. If a guy truly cares and loves you he will respect you for wanting to stay pure. When the right one comes along and you will be overjoyed to be able to give him such a special gift as your virginity, and it should be a gift he treasures. My boyfriend and i are both virgins and we know we are going to get married but we are still waiting until we do get married so that we can share that special moment and not have any regrets.
Don't give in you won't regret it!
2006-10-15 20:10:17 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well not many guys would wait until they get married to have sex with a chick honestly, if your 21 and still a virgin well your a big girl now but sex isnt everything
2006-10-15 20:05:27 · answer #9 · answered by someone_you_wish_you_knew 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
That's really up to you if you feel you are ready for it or not. Saying in experience I think you should stay a virgin! I think it is AWESOME that you are 21 and still a virgin-you should be proud of that!! If a guy dumps you because he don't like the "no sex" rule then he is not worth it-it is not worth it! I don't really see nothin wrong with kissin though-that's not major!
2006-10-15 20:09:50 · answer #10 · answered by ღ|l°Coltrane°l|ღ 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋