I'm on my bf's computer right now so I can download stuff for my own which is right next to me. I typed in images for yahoo and hit enter and accidently I swear! it ended up selecting a previous search he had done I guess with some black girl porn and violent blowjobs. With my last bf I went through SO much because of porn. And I've known my current bf for two years and we finally started dating a little over a month ago. It's not like I never thought he would look at that stuff before. But I've been with him pretty much everyday for a month and about two weeks ago moved in (he asked me). I love him dearly, it's just weird to me. The things that I guess he looked at made me uncomftroble, not insecure. Violent bj, what the hell is that? He is such a sweet person he is in NO WAY your typical guy. So I guess I just feel uncomftroble right now. What do I do? No way in hell do I want to bring it up to him. I don't feel like I have the right to. I'm afraid it will be awkward to have sex agai
2006-10-15 06:05:28 · 21 answers · asked by Konjo Nashi Pirate™ 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
We've all looked at porn at some point in our lives. Some of it we'd be ashamed to admit to others... but seriously, if black girls giving violent bj's is the worst he's looking at, then you shouldn't be too worried. Perhaps that's just one of his fantasies, and while he likes to look at it, he'd probably never act on it. The quickest and easiest way to figure it all out is to talk to him about it. If he's never tried to get you to give him a violent bj, then it's probably nothing to get yourself too upset over. I know for a fact that my hubby and I have different tastes in porn, but we are open and honest with each other about it. Things work out a lot better when we don't have secrets... and porn just isn't something that should be kept "secret" in a relationship. As long as it's perfectly legal.... It's just entertainment :)
2006-10-15 06:18:03 · answer #1 · answered by Jemmie Vee 3 · 1⤊ 2⤋
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2016-07-18 00:27:47 · answer #2 · answered by Annie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You do need to bring it up to him. Explain to him that you had accidently pushed the wrong button and it popped up. Ask him what is up? You are living together now so you have a right to know. Don't keep this secret. That isn't healthy. Give him a chance to explain without judging or making him feel bad. Let him know that you don't feel comfortable in him doing this while being with you. If this is something that he has a problem with and is not willing to give it up then you might think about moving on. I am sorry, but this type of thing is an addiction. A lot of people say oh it is normal for men to do this, but sorry it is not normal to go this far. Confront him or you can choose to ignore it. Your choice.
2006-10-15 06:12:37 · answer #3 · answered by hehmommy 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Any normal man will look at porn. If you guys say you don't you are lying. You may not but you want to anyway. It should be no big deal. Let him fantasize about violent bj's and the such. Spice is the things a great life is about. Try looking yourself and get some ideas to try on him. Make his and your life more enjoyable. There is more ways than the missionary position.
2006-10-15 06:13:34 · answer #4 · answered by Chuck C 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It sounds pretty ridiculous for you not to talk to him if this bothers you so much. You don't have a sound enough relationship to be living with this guy if you can't talk to him about anything. He may have just been curious. You will never know unless you talk to him and explain how you came across this. You can tell a lot about his reaction and how he handles the situation. If he bans you from his computer or if he tries to hide it. Or you can just start snooping and paying more attention to his behavior and his actions. In my experience most guys look at porn all different kinds it doen't mean they are a certain type of person due to the type they look at.
2006-10-15 06:28:09 · answer #5 · answered by barbie2 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If you cannot talk to him about ANYthing, why are you living with him and having sex with him? You can let him put his penis in your vagina, but you can't ask him a question about violent sexual images you saw? Y'all have got relationship issues you need to deal with...
Communicate, communicate, communicate...if you can't do that (together) then you might as well throw in the towel now and be done with it...perhaps he was simply curious...people will often read up on things they'd never actually do in real life, but still have some kind of interest in...
This will bug you indefinitely, until you address it so you can put it behind you...why stew and wonder and make yourself miserable when a conversation with him could prevent days, weeks, months (or more) of worry and confusion?
Talk about it...you know that's the only way to resolve it...just do it..
2006-10-15 06:10:45 · answer #6 · answered by . 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Porn offers to some guys a caliber of fantsy they crave.
You are unable to be those things, so he hunts them elsewhere.
Does this mean he doesn;t love you? No, as a fantasy is something that can never come ture.
But the violent fellatio is more disturbing than say group sex or two women making out.
2006-10-15 06:07:49 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 2⤋
love, sex, porn.
guys have an amazing capacity to keep all three in separate parts of their brain.
sometimes I like watching women receiving anal sex, something I would never want to do. I just think it's funny because the guy has gone in the wrong hole! Didn't she notice? Or is she complicit in being degraded?
my guess .. your guy is a little bit racist. he likes looking at that stuff because he feels those women are simply acting how they should as lower status citizens .. being used and abused.
I am saying the perception, I am not declaring black people to be inferior.
2006-10-15 06:25:19 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 3⤋
The guys r right most guys like porn, but when was he lookin at it? was this after u moved in? gurl u HAVE to talk to him about it , even the sweetest guy in the world might live 2 lives, adn u may never know about the other one till its to late ! Just b honest with him about ur feelings tell him ur srry but explain wat u did and wat happened when u did it how u found the stuff , it will b akward just doin that but trust me if ur gonna hav a relationship with this guy and live with him there can b no secrets , if u dont have trust u dont have anything!
2006-10-15 06:13:59 · answer #9 · answered by Tim P 1 · 0⤊ 2⤋
If he hasn't treated you that way then make no issue about it and the next time you and him are going to have sex just think of him and not the computer. Good luck.
2006-10-15 06:13:23 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋