My son was playing games on cartoonnetwork.com. I went downstairs to get ready for work. While I was gone he decided to go to another website for games that his friend had told him about, called addicting games, or. Well, that search brought up some other websites that he clicked on and saw very inappropriate images. I found this out because he closed out the windows and turned off the computer and was acting a little strange. He seemed nervous.
I have talked with him and explained that what he saw was not normal and not all people are like that and that the people that put that kind of stuff on the internet are sick, etc...
I am just wondering if I should continue to talk to him about it or what I should say. He is open with me now that I brought it up and he seems a little dazed by what he saw. Are there any suggestions?
2006-10-15 05:00:36 · 20 answers · asked by imjustpeachytoo 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Grade-Schooler
Sorry, I forgot to mention this...
The computer he was using was his grandfathers (which he will no longer be using because there are no parental controls set up). Our computer downstairs is fully set up with blockers, etc. This was a one time ocurance as far as using the computer up there.
2006-10-15 05:07:13 · update #1
it sounds like you handled it well. you might want to wait a week and check in with him. tell him you are still there if he wants to talk about it again.... but don't keep bringing it up. let him guide you on this... just keep an eye on him.
and definitely set up some parental controls and blockers on the computer and put the computer where you can keep an eye on him when he's on it. and tell him if anything does come up to close it out and let you know. good luck.
2006-10-15 05:04:11 · answer #1 · answered by leavemealonestalker 6 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Ok...
Well 8, he might have understood some of what he saw, but web porn is no place for children. Sorry his granddad's computer has no parental settings. You may want to ask him to password his access to the computer to prevent this in the future or put the safeguards in.
I suggest you do a history on the computer and see just what he saw. Then you can guage how much exposure he got with out grilling him on it. He is probably imbarased, and even though you had a talk with him, he may have been curious and unable to understand all he saw. I remember the first time, I saw naked images in a few riped up magazines I and a friend found in the local patch of woods. Confusion, guilt, and the weird excitement a kid gets from doing something wrong, even though we did not mean to, that is what I remember.
I am guessing he is feeling some mixed immotions, but I would not hammer him too hard about wondering on the site. He trusted you enough to tell you about it when you noticed him being nervous, that shows he is a good boy and did the right thing by not lying when he was "in trouble". This is very much to his credit.
I would check out the site, lock down the machine in some way, and just ask him very gently, when you are feeling calm and patient, if he felt bad or weird by what he saw, and remind him what you had said. Most people do not look at this kind of thing, and he should just consider it out of bounds, but he is not bad for what he saw. No need to set up a guilt complex just to make a point.
2006-10-15 07:09:42 · answer #2 · answered by shapsjo 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunately porn sites choose names that kids stumble onto all the time. What you said was good so far and since he is open and talking about all this stuff now would be a good time to ask if he has any questions or concerns and then supply him with good and correct information. Also, tell him that in the future he should not be afraid to come tell you when something inappropriate like that pops up. Accidents happen and you understand and he should come and get you so that you can trace the linkage and report the porn site to microsoft. They seem to be the only company that really cares about this issue and has spent millions to make it possible for the FBI and other state agencies to trace and locate sources of all this illigal junk. Tell grandpa to secure his computer and put his grandsons name in as a user with all the blocks in place.
2006-10-17 08:40:05 · answer #3 · answered by Geo 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You have already talked to him about it so there is no need to keep bringing it up.You done the right thing by talking to him about it and by having the parental controls set up on your computer.
Me and my husband do have an adult site for free which allow adults to view only. I know that it still don't stop kids from getting to it and viewing it anyways. We are currently working on a way to prevent kids from getting into our site. Maybe a password or something of the kind. Even though I think that it's not my fault if kids view porn on the Internet. I am a parent and still care about what other peoples kids may see on the Internet. So I like to help prevent it.
2006-10-15 05:13:41 · answer #4 · answered by larrys_babygurl_4life 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds as though he responded to the material in a very normal and healthy way. I would not make too much of it or it may become a lingering curiosity. Show him that you agree with his assessment of the material and then upgrade whatever security software you are currently using.
Parents have a more significant impact, on a child's development of a moral code, by their own behavior than by lectures.
2006-10-15 05:09:38 · answer #5 · answered by davidscottwoodruff 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
He knows the birds and be right. An eight year ought to just explaon what he saw was a part of that unless it was something really disturbing. Allow this to pass without too much focus.
2006-10-15 05:18:47 · answer #6 · answered by veritas8463 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think your explanation was sufficient. You may notice an awkward curiosity about sex now, but that's normal considering what happened. If you see any major changes in his behavior, it might be a good idea to let him talk about it with another adult you trust (talking about sex a lot with mom might be cause for even more therapy than accidentally seeing porn). Good luck. :)
2006-10-15 06:44:11 · answer #7 · answered by elizabeth_ashley44 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Good job for confronting him. 8 year olds don't need to see that...that's good that you told him that that's not how normal people are etc. if he's still acting funny then i would talk to him about it and ask him what he's feeling and thinking. as long as he's open with you, then chat with him. if he's ok then leave it. you don't want him to pull away from you for forcing the topic upon him
2006-10-15 05:10:00 · answer #8 · answered by Starry Eyes 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
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2016-10-02 07:54:44 · answer #9 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I say let it go for now, unless he brings it up to you. You did what you should've and it's over now. I would however let him know that moms and dads don't like that stuff around their kids so tell him not to tell his friends what he saw. Put it in kid words though so he understands. Other than that, I say ya did good.
2006-10-16 02:30:56 · answer #10 · answered by ~*~frankie~*~ 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋