Funeral help please (cremation)?

Question

Can anyone tell me how long a funeral service lasts, whether it is normal to have music with the commital or before?
I am doing an order of service and it's in this order... is it ok?
entry music
tribute
poem
poem
the lord's prayer
one minute silence
the commital with music
exit music
There are no prayers/hymns as that's not required apart from the lord's prayer. Any help would be appreciated. If you are not sure, please don't guess as it's important. Thanks

Answer 1

looks fine as you have done it,

Answer 2

This is a memorial service for the dead, rather than a funeral, because you mentioned cremation. So the "rules" are less rigid. There is little historical precedent. About the only times memorial services were done in the past (far enough back to constitute "tradition" now) was when someone died overseas and the body was not returned.

The way you described it above sounds excellent. You might want to consider putting the poems before the "tribute," which I suppose is your word for eulogy. That's usually the longest part, and corresponds to a sermon in a regular worship service. As you know, the preacher likes to put that near the end of the service so people will still have it somewhat in mind as they make their way home.

I prepared a memorial service for My Steve, but his family was Jewish, he and I were pagans, and it all had to be handled so as not to offend anyone, including that most of our friends were Christians. Went very well, I thought. I asked a Rabbi to speak, and he was very diplomatic. I read the eulogy myself, and most of the rest was quiet prayer and some very soft music. We played his favorite, Beethoven's Ninth, which had to be kept very low. It was the one by Leonard Bernstein at the Berlin Wall, where he substituted "Freedom" for "Joy" in the choral part. I thought it was appropriate, and so did everyone else who commented on it.

Bless you; may your fond memories sustain you.

Answer 3

As far as the reading of scripture goes, you might want to include Psalm 23. As far as music does, Rock of Ages, and Amazing Grace are traditional. Rock of Ages usually comes first. Your order of service is fine. Funerals should never be long. Respect for the deceased is the most important thing. By respecting the deceased you will respect the family. Remember that funerals are for the living, not the deceased. Protocol is of the utmost importance. Be sure that all of the family is in agreement with what you have planned.

Answer 4

to be honest i cant remember how long a service last for but your order of service sounds OK.

you sound like your worrying too much take a deep breath and keep calm your funeral director should also be able to help with any questions

i have also found it a nice thing in the past to get someone close to write something about the person that passed away and have it read at the service just before the minute silence as it helps with thoughts during the silence.

i hope all goes well for you and i am sorry for your loss

Answer 5

Necrological services are usually up to the family of the deceased or whoever is taking care of the funeral. It's also very culture specific. In my opinion, the things you have outlined here are ok already. What is really important is that everyone gets at least a final chance to remember the wonderful things that a person did. It's really the things that were done in life that matters more than the honor we bequeath at death.

Answer 6

It usually has a 30 minute slot and the funeral normally lasts for about 20 mins of that time to allow the hall to be empty when its time for the next funeral.
The order of service sounds OK, you can basically have whatever service you want nowadays so I wouldnt worry about it too much.

Answer 7

You are normally allowed a maximum of 20 minutes for a cremation service (although it is possible to extend this if the crematorium has a less busy day than usual, something which it is worth checking up on with them via the undertakers). I presume that by entry music you mean the music played as people file in and take their places. It would normally stop as the coffin is being brought in so that people know that they are to stand up. Your little order of service looks as though it will fit comfortably within the 20 minutes.

This person was obviously someone very close to you. Please accept my condolences at this sad time in your life.

Answer 8

Most services are short but some are longer. It really is up to personal choice. I have been to services that have ranged from 15 minutes to an hour and a half. The longer one's have been for younger people, usually teenagers and the shorter have been for older adults.
I'm sorry for your loss, your funeral director should be able to help with more information.

Answer 9

It isn't the responsibility of the government, it is the family's. Just like if your car were to die or a tooth to become abscessed, although unforeseen, it is expected that one will encounter these things at least once in their life. And no one expects the gov. to pay for their abscessed tooth, so why would they pay for a funeral? Death is the only sure, guaranteed thing in life. Everyone will face it, no one is exempt. Therefore why would the gov't need to foot the bill? You can't control if your roof leaks and needs replaced, so you take care of it. Same here...

Answer 10

Do whatever God leads you to do. This cermony is for the loved ones and can be done however they choose. What you have sounds fine. Are you saying the Lords prayer is "required?" Just curious.

Answer 11

You need to specify what religious tradition the person followed. Since you are including the Lord's Prayer I do assume Christian but there is still a large difference between traditions, ie. Catholic, Lutheran, Evangelical, Amish, etc