I'm 20 and have never been in a serious relationship. I've just met someone I like but the idea of being with him in an intimate sense makes me really uneasy. Not just sex, but sleeping with someone, having someone there all the time, I just can't stand it. I guess I don't want anyone to know what I'm really like. How can I get past this?
2006-10-14 18:50:41 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Once you find the right one you will gradually get used to it. I know what you mean, I was like that, but not anymore. Don't dwell on it, just relax and don't commit until it feels right.
2006-10-14 18:54:32 · answer #1 · answered by el 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well you could always go see a physciatrist but your only 20 and just because alot of people has had many relationships by then or atleast one doesn't mean you have a commitment issue. You just might not be emotionally ready for something serious so why rush into it. Theres probably more important things on your mind and thats ok. Don't feel like you have to get into a serious relationship because you don't and if the thought of getting intimate bothers you than maybe you should listen to your intuition and wait until your ready.
2006-10-14 19:00:12 · answer #2 · answered by Charmed 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would start with examining the statement of "...I don't want anyone to know what I'm really like."
If you don't like yourself then you are probably sure that no one else will either.
Figure out what you don't like about yourself and improve it.
We all have room for self improvement and when you take steps to improve your life your self esteem will be improved as well.
You may also be having trust issues. Can you trust this other person with all the secrets of your life? Opening yourself up to someone isn't easy, especially if you have been hurt before. I have found that I am most vulnerable in areas that I am not self-sufficient. Improve these areas and it will be easier to open yourself up to others.
2006-10-14 18:59:43 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its not that you are afraid of intimacy.It is you have not met the right man to keep your soul captive and keep your mind into a never ending thought of complete intimacy and love.There is nothing wrong with you.You are 20.Explore learn,and take the adventure.Someday you will know enough about what you want and who can keep in a forever dream of Ecstasy
2006-10-14 19:06:42 · answer #4 · answered by lovely soul with insite 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You may have a fear of intimacy... but that doesn't mean that this person you like is the right guy. Getting over fear of intimacy has more to do with finding someone you can be open with. Someone you trust. Don't rush intimacy, it will come with the right person.
2006-10-14 18:57:25 · answer #5 · answered by Bob 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't ever put your self in a situation like that! Girl if you feel uncomfortable in your own how with someone, then just wait until YOUR ready for that type of commitment. Don't feel pressured to do anything you feel uneasy with, just let him know exactly how you feel! Good luck..
2006-10-14 19:03:36 · answer #6 · answered by Savanna 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes you can't and you both have to learn to have space.
One girl I know that I like a lot, if we got married we'd have to have our own rooms, because we are both so independent and so different. We'd then have to arrange quality time, probably in her room because it would be cleaner than mine!
She's the kind who makes the bed every day like a maid at a hotel, I'm not.
What can I say, I'm a guy!
2006-10-14 18:56:21 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You must tear down the walls. I once read this definition of intimacy:
To stand together naked (figuratively) and unashamed. To be so personally unguarded, your able to share your deepest fear, your most guarded secret, or your most frightening thought, and you have no shame. That’s intimacy
2006-10-14 19:00:45 · answer #8 · answered by Cadmaniam 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Look deep inside yourself and see what might be going on. Do some self searching!
2006-10-14 18:52:49 · answer #9 · answered by LadyL 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hey i totally get what yr saying... even im like that... all tht does sound a lil scary... but try it once... u have to get thorugh it tomm if not today... over come the fear... tell him about it...
2006-10-14 18:53:03 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋