We used to date, and we really hit it off in the beginning. But I was also seeing someone else at the time, so I broke things off with him. He still loves me, not just because he says so, but I can see in the way he treats me and the things he says and does. He's older, and I know he'll always be emotionally and financially supportive and be a good father to my children.
The problem is, even though I know he's a good catch, I just don't feel attracted to him in that way. I've had several relationships that haven't worked out in the meantime, and he's always there to pick up the pieces, patiently waiting for me to settle down with him. I do care about his feelings, and I wouldn't want to hurt him. I know he wouldn't do anything to ever hurt me. But I just don't love him.
My mom says love can come later... is that true? Should I give it another try?
2006-10-14 18:06:53 · 21 answers · asked by ŧťŠ4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
you are asking if it is possible that you can love this guy, my answer is yes. i used to be in your shoes so to speak. i didnt love the guy who cares for me, i loved someone else. but things didnt worked out and now looking back, i'm telling myself that things would have been different had i given that loving guy a chance.i was young and carefree then. see when we get older, what matters most is that at the end of the day there is this special guy who truly loves you and treasures you and is willing to give you that unconditional love. dont rush though. take it slowly. for now just spend time together, learn and discover things together. let love grow on its own. i am not saying that you marry him now all im saying is just have a good time with him for now, at least we know you are in safe hands. good luck!
2006-10-14 18:21:53 · answer #1 · answered by mela 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It's sounds like a very practical situation. You seem to have everything worked out, on paper. The only big problem I forsee, is let's say 5 years down the road this situation is working for you and you have 2 or 3 kids and you do meet someone you love, than what? It seems from what you are saying that this guy has strong feelings for you, so unless it's just a practical arrangement for both of you, like JLo and Marc Anthony, then it's not fair to him. Also, kids want to be with parents that love one another. Not with parents that have "an arrangement" I'm not saying that love wouldn't come for you in time, but that's a lot to gamble with.
2006-10-14 18:15:21 · answer #2 · answered by JennieLouie 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
u should follow ur heart if u havnt fallen in lve with him by now then u never will u have a comfort zone with him he is like ur rebound guy. but u should never lead him to believe that there will be something more that what there is now ever one has the right to be happy and if he cant get that with u then u need to set him free and let him find someone that will love him. u need to tell him how u feel about him
2006-10-14 18:14:39 · answer #3 · answered by whiteangel 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
U have got right person in ur life but u r trying to leave him just saying that u don't love him. Remember that it's very hard to get good match in life. If u r sure u will get good partner ratherthen him then u can ignor him otherwise give him company.
2006-10-14 18:17:29 · answer #4 · answered by neplizheart 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think sO, You can't find many guys out there that will treat you like that. Guys are jurks. I think he will be good for you. And i am not sure what your mom ment or what that means but i would give him another chance. Have faith, Be strong, If he messes up he messes up. But if he loves and cares for you that much that he still is there and loves you while your seeing someone else, he would be great treating and loving to you. BUT, if you don't like him enough, or don't want to give him another chance, that is up to you. You asked for my opinion, so i gave it. But i also don't know this kid like you do. So.. Good Luck.
2006-10-14 18:13:14 · answer #5 · answered by Miami 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
YOU KNOW AS WOMEN WE ARE SO BLIND BECAUSE WE ARE ALWAYS PASSING UP SOMEONE THAT COULD BE RIGHT ONE FOR US. BUT WE ARE ALWAYS GOING FOR MR' WRONG WHO ISN'T ABOUT S$%^ AND WE ARE ALWAYS GETTING HURT IN SOME KINDA WAY. LOVE CAN POSSIBLE COME LATER. IF I WAS U I WOULD GIVE IT A TRY AND SEE WHAT HAPPENS. WHO KNOWS U MAY START TO HAVE FEELINGS FOR HIM AND FALL IN LOVE WITH HIM. AFTER ALL IT DOES TAKE TIME. DON'T LET HIM SLIP AWAY
2006-10-14 18:16:38 · answer #6 · answered by SEXXYDARKCHOCO 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
dont get married justb/c he can support you and love ur kids...
you need to be in this relationship for you...and make sure the guy treat your kids right b/c some guys only care about themselves but also later on your kids grow go off to college and have their own lives... you need someone that will be there for you when that happens someone ot enjoy your life with...can you see that with this guy? i would give on emore try..and tell him that...im willing to give another shot...and see what he says...
2006-10-14 18:10:58 · answer #7 · answered by Cutie77 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
In my opinion, if a spark isnt there for both parties then the relationship wont work. Dont settle for anything less than love.
2006-10-14 18:09:36 · answer #8 · answered by Riss 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Even if you like him for who he is as a person then that liking may sometime later turn in love.Because love takes time to develop.Ask yourself do you really wanna spend rest of your life with this guy and make your own decision.
2006-10-14 18:09:12 · answer #9 · answered by mysteryman 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes i think love comes later, and that is true, one of my friends married this guy, that she hardley knew, and now she is in love with him. So because he cares about you so much, i think respect and care is the most important part of a relationship.
2006-10-14 18:13:08 · answer #10 · answered by sarah s 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋