Bible funnies:
Q. What kind of man was Boaz before he married?
A. Ruthless.
Q. What do they call pastors in Germany?
A. German Shepherds.
Q. Who was the greatest Financier in the Bible?
A. Noah. He was floating his stock while everyone else was in liquidation.
Q. Who was the greatest female financier in the Bible?
A. Pharaoh's daughter. She went down to the bank of the Nile and drew out a little prophet.
Q. What kind of motor vehicles are in the Bible?
A. Jehovah drove Adam and Eve out of the Garden in fury. David's Triumph was heard throughout the land. Also, probably a Honda, because the apostles were all in one Accord.
Q. Who was the greatest comedian in the Bible?
A. Samson. He brought the house down.
Q. What excuse did Adam give to his children as to why he no longer lived in Eden?
A. Your mother ate us out of house and home.
Q. Which servant of God was the most flagrant lawbreaker in the Bible?
A. Moses. He broke all 10 commandments at once.
Q. Which area of Palestine was especially wealthy?
A. The area around Jordan. The banks were always overflowing.
Q. Who is the greatest baby sitter mentioned in the Bible?
A. David. He rocked Goliath to a very deep sleep.
Q. Which Bible character had no parents?
A. Joshua, son of Nun.
Q. Why didn't they play cards on the Ark?
A. Because Noah was standing on the deck. (Groannn...)
PS... Did you know it's wrong for a woman to make coffee?
Yup, it's in the Bible. It says . . . "Hebrews"
2006-10-14 14:03:40 · 16 answers · asked by basscatcher 4 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
LOL LOL LOL!!! Giggle! Heeeeheeeee
I am a lover of dumb jokes and am happy now!
2006-10-14 15:03:30 · answer #1 · answered by Miss Vicki 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
The important thing is to use God’s personal name in whatever language you speak, rather than insisting upon the impersonal! The name “Yahweh” is certainly preferable to the non-name “God” or “Lord”, especially if you speak Hebrew. If you speak English, feel free to use the name "Jehovah".
(Psalms 83:18) That people may know that you, whose name is Jehovah, You alone are the Most High over all the earth
(John 17:26) [Jesus said] I have made your name known to them and will make it known, in order that the love with which you loved me may be in them
Learn more:
http://watchtower.org/library/na/index.htm
2006-10-15 05:59:43 · answer #2 · answered by achtung_heiss 7 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Cars must have been much larger in those days. An Accord now is tight with 4 people?
2006-10-14 21:12:58 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Awesome.
2006-10-14 21:17:21 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Lol, they were pretty funny, I liked the Samson one the most!
2006-10-14 21:17:55 · answer #5 · answered by cass 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I like them all, and none of them were in poor taste. Got anymore?
2006-10-15 01:03:55 · answer #6 · answered by juicie813 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
These are all pretty good. But where does it say that it's wrong to make coffee?
2006-10-14 21:10:54 · answer #7 · answered by Jessica 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Good ones. Got my nightly laugh in...
2006-10-14 21:07:21 · answer #8 · answered by azar_and_bath 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
those are good jokes.. except the one at the bottom is little anti-hebrew.
2006-10-14 21:07:21 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
LOL! I needed that.
2006-10-14 21:29:06 · answer #10 · answered by Kenny 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋