I am doing the internet thing. I swore I never would but I totally fell for this guy from Kansas and I love him more than I've ever loved anyone. I have two kids and we had planned to move to Kansas this weekend which sounds stupid considering we haven't met in person yet, but he said he was totally sure and I felt that I was too. He cancelled on me at the last minute saying he's not sure he is ready for a family yet. We have been talking for 5 months and until this point he said he was 100% sure but he informed me last night that he was just telling me what he thought I wanted to hear but that he really does love me and he wasn't just saying that. I am so hurt right now and I can't imagine my life without him but should I wait and meet him in person and go from there or should I just cut my losses and move on? I don't want to move on if there is a chance for us to work and I'm not a pushy person. I can handle the wait if there's a possibility he will be ready. I sound pitiful I know!
2006-10-14 12:14:26 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Don't rush into anything like this. This is a big step or even a giant step. There are ways through different sources that are free that you can have this person checked out to make sure they are who they say they are and not just a scheming scam artist. I urge you to talk to a counselor in one of the fields that support love or lust or something inbetween before you put all of your eggs into one basket. The sensible thing would be to have him come visit you, instead of you packing up and going to him when he may not even be the real thing. And in most recent cases over the internet this seems to be the way scam artists are taking advantage of others. With no thought to these other people or their feelings. Just lets get together and could you loan me some money to tide me over until I can get there to visit and then I'll pay you back. Do you see where this type of relationship can go?
2006-10-14 12:20:28 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
You don't sound pitiful at all. Your hurt and you have every single right to be. I was in a similar situation a few years ago. Sold everything I owned and was ready to move and my guy told me not to come. I waited for a year and he came back to me and we ended up breaking up again cause his word just didn't mean anything to me anymore. Please do yourself a favor and give up on him now before he hurts you more. How will you ever be able to trust him again? You also have 2 children to think about.
2006-10-14 19:23:09 · answer #2 · answered by elanabutcher 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
it doesn't sound pitiful you just fell for him it happens all the time, but if anything i would meet him first before such a big move...he might and probably is a very different person in person and do a background check...be sure not to subject your children to someone you don't know...good luck
2006-10-14 19:19:49 · answer #3 · answered by - 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Pitiful yes, Go ahead and meet him, you will always be wandering what if and the what if's can really annoy a person. Good luck.
2006-10-14 19:19:18 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
A family is a big commitment,if he is not ready at least he realizes that.You have to be smart because you aren't alone,everything you do affects not just you , but your children.Meet him by yourself and take some time to get to know him .Don't make a quick decision that you may regret later.
2006-10-14 19:20:28 · answer #5 · answered by Tom S 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
i think you should see him in person first and have your kids meet him then talk a while longer and decide on stuff .. oh and when you meet for the first time, meet in a pubic place cause you know theres weird people on the computer
2006-10-14 19:23:27 · answer #6 · answered by sunshine&rainbows 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
i think you should wait first but at least he was honest its not so sure if he gives you the answer on the phone believe me ive had experience, just meet him in person and see how that goes
2006-10-14 19:20:12 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
If you really think there is a good chance this could work I think you should wait and see what happens after you have met. Good luck.
2006-10-14 19:19:26 · answer #8 · answered by Sparkle 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You've been talking to this guy 5 months and you are taking your children...uprooting them and moving them to a different state to see a guy you've never met and who seems pretty shady to me. I can't believe you are even thinking about this.....you need to wake up and be a mother to your children and stop talking to people who want you to uproot your family for them.....
2006-10-14 19:19:24 · answer #9 · answered by b_fab115 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
you should definently wait till you meet him before you make any decisions about you and your kids moving.
2006-10-14 19:20:26 · answer #10 · answered by diane c 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋