I am currently in a long distance relationship. In all of my past relationships I have had major major trust issues. My current boyfriend has not given me any real reason for not trusting him. I went to visit him last week and found condoms in his car and bathroom. He lives with his cousin and also shares his car with his cousin. I flipped out on him and he told me "You just have to trust me. I'm not a liar and I'm not a player. I'm not cheating on you. They belong to my cousin". Everything he tells me I doubt. My friends and therapist tell me that I am over-reacting...I don't know if this is my own messed up mind causing these problems or if it is my gut telling me something. He also used to talk about me moving to where he lives (not living with him but finding my own roommate) but has not brought up the subject lately. Should I be alarmed or just call myself crazy? Someone please give your opinion. Only serious answers please!
2006-10-14 08:15:41 · 6 answers · asked by italiana2683 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Hehehehehehe
Carpe Diem!
2006-10-14 08:38:54 · answer #1 · answered by afrodyzyak 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Long distance relationships are hard to have without trust & if he once said that he wanted you to move there & hasn't spoke of it again I would be curious why not??? Call his bluff & tell him you have thought about it & you are going to move there & see his reaction or you could give him a surprise visit. I personally have heard the line that is my cousins stuff before & I pray for your sake he is telling the truth.
2006-10-14 08:24:06 · answer #2 · answered by "karma" 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
you shouldn't be alarmed and take it easy.. there is the 1% chance that the condoms you found did belong to him... but if he shares his residence with the cousin, then is a 99% chance that they are his (cousins).... give him the benefit of the doubt.. you said yourself that he hasn't given you a reason for you to suspect... and me telling you that you're overreacting is free... dump the $250/hour therapist.... (unless you're dealing with other issues)... good luck
2006-10-14 08:21:02 · answer #3 · answered by Jorge R 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It very hard to know if you are overreacting without knowing both of you. I would be a little unnerved if I were you too. Maybe you just have to give him the benefit of the doubt? I know a lot of guys who just like to keep rubbers around. Some keep them because it makes them feel cool. Others like to masturbate with them (seriously) They like the tight feel.
Why don't you give him the benefit of the doubt and see what happens?
2006-10-14 08:26:52 · answer #4 · answered by The It Girl ∆☻乐 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you are in a defensive mode, if he has asked you to move close to him is because he really wants to show you that he is been honest with you, if he has not brought the subject back it maybe because he is giving you time to think about it and to be sure of your decision.
2006-10-14 08:20:19 · answer #5 · answered by infantry55 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I would be alarmed, wut does he want for the future, does he want to marry you? do you want to marry him? or do u both just want long distance relationship? these are the questions i wud ask myself and go from there, it is a nitemare to be with sumone u cant trust, u wud be better off alone than with sumbody u cant trust, life is to short to waste it on drama
2006-10-14 08:21:13 · answer #6 · answered by menguss 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋