i'm 18 years old and i am dating a 21 year old... i love to be affectionate (cuddling, holding hands, kissing) my b/f does like things things, but we are both virgins, and he is afraid if i go so far, we may forget to turn things off before it gets out of hand...
so therefor he avoids kissing me, hugging, etc... ITS ABOUT TO DRIVE ME INSANE... what is the point of dating if there ISN'T ANY AFFECTION AT ALL... i do care for this guy, or i would not have spent as long as i have with him...
what can i do to relax him so he will be more affectionate??
is there anything to avoid doing?
give me all possible anythings that are related to this plz... i will Be very very thankful...
oh yeah... im letting 20 days go... if i don't see anything, i'm gone...
2006-10-14 04:46:39 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Sounds like he does like to touch, and it is just as hard for him not to as it is for you. You are getting respect, wich is almost impossible to find. I guess you could just go find some disrespectful @$$ who can't keep his hands off you and throw this good guy away and regret it forever, or you could Keep him and get a big Teddy bear to hug on until the time is right!
2006-10-14 04:54:18 · answer #1 · answered by ptt_pntr 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
U r one of the luckiest girl on earth to have such a guy by ur side.
Just imagine the other way round, would u have liked if he spent time with u just to get the benefit of "touch" ?
Here this guy is a sensitive, truly affectionate and responsible person, who really cares for U. he loves u so much that he needs not to exhibit it thru touches.
U r not wrong either, but he is more correct, try to become like him too, rather than trying to convert him like U.
2006-10-14 11:53:24 · answer #2 · answered by trapped_tigress 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Try reassuring him that you wont let things go to far and to not be upset if you say okay that is enough. Let him know that it is just kind of like foreplay without finishing the game (for now). But if you think that there are other guys that can get you warmed up and that you can just shut it off then your not really getting warmed up. But if it dosen't satisfy you then your probably better off heading on to new adventures
2006-10-14 11:51:11 · answer #3 · answered by dmxdragon2 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
wow, I feel bad for you. He may not be confident in his sex drive, but if your a nice enough lady, he should not have a problem telling you about it. It can get embarrassing for most men. He need to be affectionate with you. It's kinna weird, but it sounds like he needs a confidence booster. Love him and talk to him. Just don't dump him, cause if you do, in his mind all women are mean.
Glad to be at your service
2006-10-14 11:54:32 · answer #4 · answered by james w 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you guys can be afrectionate without it leadin to sex. i know people who had very healthy relatiuonships that lasted 5 yrs be4 marriage that they lost thier virginty on their weddin night. there are plenty of otha ways to show u love eachother without sex and if things do heat up there are plenty of ways to relive da need witout losin ur virginity. of course i cannot relate i neva saved myslef i had sex with the first guy who would do it and i wish i had saved myself 4 sum1 special. u go grl. jus enjoy an tell him u need to b affecvtionate an u can contain urself an u respect that he dunt want 2 hav sex yet an u wont try 2 convince him othawise. hav a good day grl.
2006-10-14 11:52:41 · answer #5 · answered by 1 Hott Mami 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
A guy I was dating was like that and he was 42 ,he said it was the way he was raised his family didn't give no affection. he won't change. if there is no affection why be with someone? I left I couldn't handle it either.but he's a good guy and I liked him alot, I just can't be in a relationship with no affection.were just friends now.
2006-10-14 11:56:45 · answer #6 · answered by smurfette_ftwayne 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have you explainded to him that you feeling kind of affection starved? I think he should know that you are ok with not going too far, but if you can't get anything you won't be happy and therefore you won't be around.
2006-10-14 11:54:00 · answer #7 · answered by Chris D 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He cant handle the affection because he doesnt think he can control himself. Its his choice. Shouldnt you accept that? I mean, if it were you, you would want him to respect your feelings, wouldnt you?
But I do understand what your saying. All you can do is let him know how you feel and take it from there.
2006-10-14 11:50:27 · answer #8 · answered by JC 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you marry him someday, you can do these things with him, and be patient in the meantime. If not, you may just have to live with it, seeing as how he isn't that interested in it.
2006-10-14 11:53:40 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I hope you don't find this inappropriate: have him masturbate before you come over, so he will be relaxed. I understand where he is coming from; it's hard at his age to keep from getting excited.
2006-10-14 11:50:21 · answer #10 · answered by schweetums 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋