Is there anything i can do to help my dad's depression?

Question

I love him dearly and i always try to be understanding with him and pray for him, but lately its really been gettin to me and i'm frustrated with him being gloomy all the time, hes become so selfish and when we spend time together he has to fake havinf fun so i won't see how he feels, but i do......

Answer 1

You have a real problem here. You need counseling. If you have health coverage, get some help with this situation. Also, you can not make yourself responsible for your Dad's problem. Depression is nothing to take lightly. But you need to talk to a professional about this because it is really tricky when a kid tries to solve a problem the parents are having. Also, kids sometimes blame themselves for problems other family members have, if you are doing this you need to know it, and you need to resolve it.
The best thing you can do for your Dad is take care of your own problem.
The fact that he is trying to fool you into thinking he is better than what he is, means he really cares for you, but he does not know how to change his problem or help your problem with him. But you can change your problem by focusing on yourself and not on your Father. This will help him. You take care of you, and your father can focus on himself. Got it! Talk to a Professional Counselor and tell him or her what is happening and how you are feeling. Don't be shy, do it!

Answer 2

The following was sent to me several years ago and still helps me! It may help your Dad too:

Natural Highs or Things That Will Help Make You Feel Good! Think about them one at a time before going on to the next one. It does make you feel good, especially the thought at the end #45.
1. Falling in love.
2. Laughing so hard your face hurts.
3. A hot shower.
4. No lines at the supermarket.
5. A special glance.
6. Getting a card or letter in the mail
7. Taking a drive on a pretty road.
8. Hearing your favorite song on the radio.!
9. Lying in bed listening to the rain outside.
10. Hot towels fresh out of the dryer.
11. Chocolate milkshake (vanilla or strawberry).
12. A bubble bath.
13. Giggling
14. A good conversation.
15. The beach
16. Finding a 20 dollar bill in your coat from last winter.
17. Laughing at yourself.
18. Looking into someones eyes and knowing that they Love you
19. Midnight phone calls that last for hours.
20. Running through sprinklers.
21. Laughing for absolutely no reason at all.
22. Having someone tell you that you're beautiful.
23. Laughing at an inside joke
24. Friends.
25. Accidentally overhearing someone say something nice about you.
26. Waking up and realizing you still have a few hours left to sleep.
27. Your first kiss (either the very first or with a new partner).
28. Making new friends or spending time with old ones.
29 Playing with a new puppy or kitten.
30. Having someone play with your hair.
31. Sweet dreams.
32. Hot chocolate.
33. Road trips with friends.
34. Swinging on swings.
35. Making eye contact with a cute stranger.
36. Making chocolate chip cookies.
37. Having your friends send you homemade cookies.
38. Holding hands with someone you care about.
39. Running into an old friend and realizing that some things (good or bad) never change.
40 Watching the expression on someone's face as they open a much desired present from you.
41. Watching the sunrise.
42. Getting out of bed every morning and being grateful for another beautiful day.
43. Knowing that somebody misses you.
44. Getting a hug from someone you care about deeply.
45. Knowing you've done the right thing, no matter what other people think.

Answer 3

It is very difficult caring for someone who has depressison. It's hard to know how you can help and it's also hard being with someone whose moods affect you.

You sound so caring but also so very tired. Much as you love and care for your dad, YOU need to take care of YOU. You need to make sure that you have time for yourself doing the things that you enjoy and time to relax. This is vital,not only for your own sanity but you''ll find a refreshed you can cope better with your dad.

Try to make your visits frequent though short and make sure you have days off. Is there anyone who can share the caring?
You are not failing by asking others to step in at times, you are simply managing the situation much more effectively.

You need to be careful that your dad's depression does not become YOUR world. How will you (or he) cope if you go under?

It is, of course, also very difficult for your dad. Depression can hit really hard and the world becomes a different place.

It would help both of you if HE had activities that he could attend, it would be occupational therapy for him and aid recovery.

Is there a carer's group run near where you live? Contact local services to find out.

You may feel more guilt or selfish in taking time and space for yourself, but it is not a luxury, it is ESSENTIAL.

Best wishes to both of you.

Answer 4

that means your dad is trying for your sake, that is not always easy for him I am sure, did your parents break up, maybe he is upset over that or work can be totally rough. Try to think of something you and he can do that is so much fun always have things planned to do that will get him out and about, tell him you want him to be happy and encourage him to get in shape, clean up and find a new love! Maybe he is afriad you wouldn't want that for him. good luck it is a hard challege but he needs your help. You might suggest he could go talk to a minister or couselor too

Answer 5

It sounds like he's having a case of major depression. I would try to keep communication open between the two of you. Have you tried to talk to him about going to someone that is a professional in that field? You need someone to talk to also. You are carrying more than your load. Be careful my friend you are in a situation that it is possible that you could become depressed also.

Take care and God bless

Answer 6

Support him, educate yourself about it, talk to him, help him cope. Perhaps give him journals to express feelings and let him know how great he really is! Try getting outside or doing something together, perhaps you both love movies, sports or some sort of game.

Answer 7

i'd look for more professional help about a plan of what you can do.

i think he needs you to hang on, he might need medication, think positive though, just try & make a plan of what you're going to do
& just take it bit by bit

it's a hard thing to have to deal with

Answer 8

yes it is common for elderly people to feel this way. Dont' let him know how he feels. Just try to talk about the good times tyou shared togrther. I know it is hard but let him know the good times you shared.

Answer 9

yes, see what his problem is and come up with something true and usefull thats positive if he still has some trouble. please pray for him. no im not your mother

Answer 10

what is he depressed about? you may find the solution in reversing that