I am a Christian whos husband left and divorced her. My beliefs have ALWAYS been that scripture says that God allowed divorce because our hearts were all messed up but it was never suppose to be that way. Secondly, I have found that my heart has fallen out of love for my ex husband and I would love nothing more then to be released from him however, I TRUELY believe, in the depths of my spirit that God has NOT said this is ok. Now I am feeling some strong feelings for a guy at my church who I hang out with a bit, but who only sees me as a friend. But I STILL don't feel like I have been released from my ex.. What would you do in my case? Aside from pray because I am already doing that... Can you also pray for me too?
2006-10-13 11:22:39 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Look for grace and forgiveness, even Jesus loved the Samaritan women who was married 5 times and living with another. Take a look at your new interest, is he the one God has for you or are you getting into another bad situation following your ideas and not his. Take your time and keep praying.
2006-10-13 11:26:47 · answer #1 · answered by fyrechick 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This is a very tough subject. I've been there. My first husband, the father of my two children died in a car wreck. About 5 years later I remarried, who I that was a wonderful person and loved my kids. Turned out he was putting on a great front and told me he had just married me for my money that I had received from life insurance. I still tried to hold it together because I stood before God and promised forever. I couldn't do it. He became abusive to my children and really bad to me, so I had no other choice but to save us and divorce him. I told myself that I would never get married again. The Bible also says that it is even better for a widow to remain unmarried, so I felt like a two time looser. I later met a wonderful man, who loves both me and my kids. After long prayer, talks with elderly people in my church, I decided that 1) God wants us to be happy. 2) As long as we believe and receive, we will rejoice in the kingdom of heaven.
I have to admit that I'm not always sure I have done the right thing, but my life is going well, my kids are growing up to be great people, and I have so much love and support from my now husband.
Talk with your pastor, or any people that you feel comfortable with talk to. It is amazing how much insight the elderly can give you. And YES, I will pray for you too.
2006-10-13 18:33:44 · answer #2 · answered by cowboys21angel 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey, I was in your exact same shoes... Me and my ex even went to ministry school and worked in churches together. But he divorced me after 10 yrs... I believed the same way you did. But, now I have come to peace with it. Do you know the scriptures that say this:
Mat 22:30 "For in the resurrection they neither marry, nor are given in marriage, but are as the angels of God in heaven."
There is no marriage in heaven. Marriage is a union only for this life - to compliment our life here on earth. If the marriage has no love or is dead or abandoned or severed... Why would God not release you from it? Think about this - has God forgiven you of your sins? Of course, and he has forgiven you of your divorce. Your divorce is not so filthy a sin that Jesus blood can't wash it away. You are cleansed, forgiven, you are declared righteous by God himself - if you put your trust in the blood of Jesus for your salvation.
You are free to move on with your life... I'm sure God saw you dying in that loveless marriage and was the one who rescued you from it in the first place... I know that is what he did for me. I would have never left that man - who happened to have never loved me. You have to realize God is the one who probably got you out of that bad situation.. He probably has a better plan for you. If you're like me - you have learned compassion and understanding for others who have gone through the agony of divorce...
God has now brought the real love of my life to me - my true soul mate and now I can see it was all a part of God's plan - No, I don't really understand how or why it had to be this way. But I am thankful.
God bless you. You are released - you have prayed to be released but you do not feel it yet. God will give you understanding soon - keep seeking.
2006-10-13 18:38:01 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
if he left you, then there is nothing for you to feel guilty about. However, the only way you can be released from him is if he has committed adultery-had relations with someone other than his wife(that's you). If so, in God's eyes, you have grounds for divorce and are free to date/remarry. Of course I will pray for you, as you are not in an easy situation. Take care.
2006-10-13 18:28:04 · answer #4 · answered by justfeelingfroggy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't have my Bible right here in front of me, but I, too went through something similar. Somewhere in one of the epistles to the Corinthians (I think it's 1st Cor.) Paul addresses this. If your spouse leaves you, and he didn't have any cause (such as adultery) to leave, God releases you-it was your husband that broke covenant with God, not you. I felt guilty for years until we discussed that in S.S. class and I read for myself what the Scripture said. Spend some time reading, and in prayer, and ask the Lord to help you feel released. He is just, He is loving, and He is forgiving. He does not want you to live in guilt-He wants to free you from guilt. Trust Him and His Word.
2006-10-13 18:30:41 · answer #5 · answered by Sc_theTruth_Torch 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My dear, God has nothing to do with you feeling that you are not released from your ex...it is YOU who is keeping YOU still tied with this man. I will pray for you, and believe me, God knows what is in your heart...You are dealing with the "death" of this marriage, and all the feelings that go along with it. Give yourself time, and get out and begin a new life for yourself...He has.
2006-10-13 18:29:00 · answer #6 · answered by angeleyes 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds to me like your husband broke the bond, the promise with God not you, and he will have to answer for that not you. I think God has released you, it just takes us a while to feel not guilty and feel like we didn't let God down, and release our self. There is a good book and also a bible study by Beth Moore "Breaking Free", it is not dedicated to divorce it is just about breaking the bonds in your life. You should get it you will love it.
2006-10-13 18:27:31 · answer #7 · answered by Jennifer Dalpe 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I feel your pain, and I'll definitely pray for you. I think they offer retreats where you can go and be spiritually renewed of relationships. I know of one called Living Waters. This might help you to be able to see more clearly what the Lord has in store for your life, as well as allowing you to be free from your ex. Good luck, God bless.
2006-10-13 18:27:35 · answer #8 · answered by deepwaters05 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am sorry for your divorce. God allows divorce in certain situations I have been taught. If you believe that God is telling you that at this time your feelings are not ok, listen to Him. You will know when it is ok. God's Will feels right. It's our will that keeps us all messed up.
2006-10-13 18:33:10 · answer #9 · answered by Jamie a 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I cannot give you any scripture to alleviate your feelings, However if your husband has divorced you then I feel that youshould be blameless. If you have feelings for someone that is perfectly natural. I dont think GOD will hold it against you if you get on with your life.
2006-10-13 18:27:14 · answer #10 · answered by snoop_dougie_doug04 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋