My 13 yr/old daughter has tried softball, swimming, racquetball, TiaKwonDo, and now volleyball. It's obvious she's not athletically inclined. Should I continue to push her though? I think it's good socially to be into some type of sport.
2006-10-13 07:17:10 · 28 answers · asked by Buzz Lightyear 2 in Sports ➔ Volleyball
No. It's really important for your daughter to like herself! If she's not athletically inclined and you keep putting her on sports teams, she's going to know that she's no good at it. Kids need to feel like they're successful at SOMETHING. Athletes, friends and parents will make your daughter feel like crap if she's constantly messing up.
Also, it's not fair to the other kids on the team if your daughter proves to be the weakest link at all times. The result will be more negative than positive.
Your best bet will be to find something that your daughter is good at like musical instruments, dance or some kind of art. Maybe she's a good writer, or good at languages. There's always time for physical outlets like jogging later on. Just think: in all the time that you're forcing her to do something she's NOT good at, she's losing time developing a skill that she IS good at.
2006-10-17 04:55:17 · answer #1 · answered by SedaCanela 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was very similiar to your daughter- not athletically inclined. Socially, it wasn't an issue, because i was/am very musically inclined, but its gotten to be an issue as I've gotten older.
Sometimes, the competitive nature can turn kids off of sports, and if she's not very good at them, of course she isn't having any fun! Is there a way that you can look at non-competitive athletic activities?
I don't think that you should push your kids to do something that they are really inept in, and not everyone is great at everything, but you have to temper that with the need to be well rounded. Sometimes personal goals are better than team based scoring games. ( If she can lift more weight than she did last week, or run a little faster, etc). In that case, it doesn't feel like the effort in futility because she doesn't think that she'll ever win.
2006-10-13 07:28:25 · answer #2 · answered by Lisa'sGurl 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
At thirteen, if she is not sports-minded, I would not recommend team sports. Probably at 13 she is pretty self-conscious and swimming wouldn't be a good thing either. Personally, I think you should give Taekwondo a try again. If she quit the first time because she didn't like it or was too young, find another Taekwondo school in your area. A good instructor will not only be able to teach the movements and techniques, but will also be able to work on the discipline and confidence issues. Also, be firm with her. Make her agree to put no-less than six months into anything she tries. You can not get good at anything unless there is time and effort involved. Good luck!
2006-10-13 07:27:23 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
One of the clues why she hates sports might be in her bust size. If she's as big as I was at that age, she'll never like bouncing around.
You can't really push a girl into being a sports fan and there are other activities she'll enjoy more. I did enjoy Tai Chi (for exercise) and bellydancing where it's an asset to have more.
There are also living history groups like the Society for Creative Anachronism (Middle Ages) and the Civil War re-enactors. That sort of stuff encourages young people to be more mannerly, more confident, and have a real interest in history.
Try to find activities less sporty for her.
2006-10-13 07:36:59 · answer #4 · answered by loryntoo 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
The key is not to force the issue. "Encourage" rather than "push." But yes, continue.
Some people just aren't as gifted in athletics. Forcing the issue will just create resentment. Finding the right sport or team activity will be the hard part.
Being in a team environment is great both for ftiness and socially. You are wise to get her involved. If she isn't terribly athletically inclined, look at other sports. Soccer? Track, cross country? Cycling, or other endurance sports? Golf?
Be as positive as possible, and be up front with your motivation for encouraging her particpation. Emphasize the fun.
2006-10-13 07:27:40 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
You shouldn't force your daughter to be or do anything. If she wants to do something she'll do it. Shes still very young and shes still making up her mind of what she wants to do. When your young your mind changes a lot of figuring out what you want to be. You don't have to worry about your daughter not knowing about what she wants to do until shes a junior in high school.
2016-05-21 23:13:55 · answer #6 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't push her she will find what she is into. I played all the sports and that was interesting but now I love theatre! My younger brother told my parents they would have to pay him to play outfield another day (as a 5 year old!) and now he plays guitar all the time. You might encourage her to explore the arts. And academics can be awesome too I did all kinds of math and science competitions in school. I highly encourage theater, music, art, something like that!
2006-10-14 11:28:37 · answer #7 · answered by i_luv_vball21 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You said it yourself - "She is not so sports minded". If she doesn't like sports, don't push her. She will only resent you for forcing your will upon her. There must be other activities available at her school or in the community where she could socialize and participate with other kids her age. Let her find her own way, and support whatever decisions she makes.
2006-10-13 07:23:52 · answer #8 · answered by retracm67 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
No you did the right thing in exposing her to it. Maybe offer a game to go to here and there but let her make her own choices on sports. I was fortunate I never got pushed but it was always around me either on TV at home or relatives homes and in the playground. I don't know that she would resent you in the long run but it's not worth taking your chances.
2006-10-13 07:52:09 · answer #9 · answered by Colin L 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
She probably isn't athletically inclined. i don't think you should push her. ask her if she wants to do volleyball. if she doesn't, suggest some other sports, if you really want her to participate in a sport. if she does, then let her play.
2006-10-14 07:51:03 · answer #10 · answered by katiebug1293 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋