With the exception of abuse why would women do this? Im mainly asking women who do and who do it to "get him back". Seriously,if I split with my husband for anything other than abuse, I would be very angry if he didnt spend just just as much time with them. Their still his kids. Every other weekend dosent cut it. Every day,just an hour and time on weekends and every couple weeks(or something) the two parents should be together with their kids,these kids still love their parents even if you hate each other,they should still have their "family" once in a while.
You may be single but your not childless.
2006-10-13 06:02:58 · 11 answers · asked by TrofyWife 4 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
i have known a few friends who have held their child from seeing the father because they were pissed at them... I have told her that it is not right... He is a father wanting to be in your child's life and you are choosing for him not to see them.. I believe that is why most fathers back away from the child because they know it the long run the mother is going to hurt daddy again.. but little does the mother realize that they are hurting the child too... Children deserve to see both parents all the time...
2006-10-13 06:26:02 · answer #1 · answered by DO IT! 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Honestly that happens for many reasons. Me well I dont let my first husband have anything to do with our son because well when we were together he was a great dad and then all of a sudden when we are not together anymore he started calling once every 6 monthes and my son was very young he is only 3 now so I kept having to intruduce my son to his daddy and man that was so hard it broke my heart. Now I finally decided 2 monthes ago not to let him see my son at all. He had not called or come around in the past 10 monthes so I dont want my sons heart to be broken he always had so many questions as to where his daddy was and when is he coming back when I knew it could be a long time before he even called. He was in and out way to much. Think about it my son asked me the other day why his daddy was not his friend anymore. That still takes my heart. So there are many good reasons but there are also many females like my current husbands ex who just dont care about anything but them selves.
2006-10-13 06:09:42 · answer #2 · answered by DeborahUlloa 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It is really easy for you to be able to say that the two parents should be together with the kids every so often when you are not in the situation.
First, let me say that I am not witholding my son from seeing his dad. They see eachother on Tues/Thurs nights from the end of school until 7:30 and then they are with eachother every other weekend.
Forcing us to act like a family and hang with each other every so often would be awkward and uncomfortable, which kids clue into very quickly. It is also confusing b/c the child - having two homes is confusing enough as it is - why confuse it more with mixing it up every so often iwth all of us being together so that my son can wonder what the heck is going on?
2006-10-13 06:10:52 · answer #3 · answered by Jacki 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Not too long ago the children of the relationship were considered the property of the father, and it was the father that decided whether or not the mother would be part of her childrens lives.
Queue feminazis and the womens rights movement.
Using a child as revenge, either by the mother or the father, is bratty and bordering on illegal, being considered as psychological abuse. It's called parental alienation.
More fathers that are actually concerned about and want to see their children should visit with their attorneys on this...
2006-10-13 07:21:06 · answer #4 · answered by sovereign_carrie 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think often times its just about control,especially if the relationship between father and mother ended because the father wanted it to,and the mother had no control over it. I think it can also be revenge. I hate to say it but sometimes men will throw their hands up,and say I give up when the mothers play this constant game of I control when you see your child,and mothers need to learn how to not constantly start arguments over dumb things,it will cause the father to not want to make contact until the child is old enough to contact the father on their own.
2006-10-13 08:38:04 · answer #5 · answered by prettybelle7 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
That is the smartest question I've seen today! Very refreshing!
I agree with you 100%. I work in family law and see this situation all the time. Women need to stop using the kids as pawns and remember that SHE and the FATHER got divorced, not the KIDS.
2006-10-13 06:21:03 · answer #6 · answered by Starla_C 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Being seperated and or divorced is a bad time both for the parents and the children. If these games occur and they do mindlessly. The children will take note and in the future, the player will pay in some way. Remember, children do not forget.....
2006-10-13 06:25:22 · answer #7 · answered by DenMan 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
No, absolutely not. Women use the kids as pawns in a relationship, so wrong. Let the dads be responsible. Hell he should take them 50% of the time and pay 50% of the expenses.
2006-10-13 06:12:07 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think you have hit the nail squarely on the head. It is pure spite and revenge. Unfortunately, our legal system is so sexist, there is very little that can be done about it, which is why you see these pathetically sad stories of men killing their children to avoid being parted from them.
2006-10-13 06:07:22 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
SOME PEOPLE ARE JUST SCANDELOUS INDIVIDUALS AND DON'T CARE ABOUT OTHER PEOPLES FEELINGS. THEY DO NOT UNDERSTAND THAT THEY ARE HURTING THE CHILDREN ALSO. THE CHILDREN ARE ENTITLED TO SEE THEIR PARENTS. IT IS SO STRANGE BECAUSE THE WOMEN THAT WANT THE FATHERS TO BE INVOLVED, THE FATHERS DON'T WANT TO BE INVOLVED. BUT THEN YOU HAVE THE FATHERS WHO WANT TO BE WITH THERE CHILD AND CAN'T BECAUSE OF THE MOTHER. THIS IS SO SAD BECAUSE THE CHILD SUFFERS. THEN THE MOM WONDERS WHY IS THEIR CHILD TRIPPING. THEY ARE NOT REALIZING THAT THEY ARE THE CAUSE OF THIS BECAUSE THE CHILD MISS THEIR DAD.
2006-10-13 06:09:19 · answer #10 · answered by PRECIANA 4 · 2⤊ 2⤋