Why do i either attract men who are losers who just want to play around or leave or men who are too clingy, possessive, desperate, and want a baby right away? Also, why would this guy ive been dating for two months who admits he is a player after i finally called him on it keep apologizing that he cant commit and he keeps asking me how i feel about it and telling me how great i am and that one day i will meet someone worthy...does he just feel guilty? Sorry if the question is dumb...also...im 24, attractive, successful and well educated...so its gotta be me then?
2006-10-13 05:31:14 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
you guys are awesome thanks!!
2006-10-13 05:47:58 · update #1
It is you! Slow down, dont jump at the first guy that comes along- there are more fish in the ocean!
2006-10-13 05:35:02 · answer #1 · answered by Anarchy99 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If it happened once or twice, I'd say it's them. But this seems to be a pattern so I think its definitely you.
Just because you're attractive, successful and well educated doesn't mean that you can't have self esteem issues. I know, I was you and had them up the wazoo. If I had been able to step back from my situation and look at it objectively, there's no way I would have dated most of the men I did during that time period. Yeah, they were losers...but if I couldn't maintain a relationship or their interest, then what did that make me? Well...an attractive, successful, well educated loser.
I'd get off the dating track for a while and focus on myself. Get with a good therapist who can help you analyze this loop you seem to be in and see if he / she can help you out of it.
2006-10-13 05:41:24 · answer #2 · answered by Le_Roche 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was quite arrogant and thought a good looking girl like me cant be insecure, what do you mean low self esteem i said, not me.
After looking deep within myself I realized that therapist was right.
It has helped me make better choices in dating.
But check this out you're 24 it ain't that serious girl. You're young why do you want to be tied down anyway, have fun use condoms and be a player for awhile.
2006-10-13 05:38:39 · answer #3 · answered by Jazz 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think we must live close together because I feel the same way about my recent dating experiences.
I'm actually trying to be single for awhile now. I realized that I wasn't really following through with my standards. I would say to myself..ok..I want a man that has a job and has his own place. But when I would meet a guy I found attractive, I would ask about the job or place situation and adjust it for the cutie instead of saying..well, ur cute but ur not what i'm looking for in a relationship.
Every relationship is an experience..so don't get discouraged :)
2006-10-13 05:40:37 · answer #4 · answered by michellewho11582 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nothing ever just has to be you. Stop saying that a mans short commings and downfalls and hang ups are just that a mans. It really has nothing to do with you, all I can really say is listen take to heart what they say, if they say they cant committ in the start, take a step back cause they are just kick it buddies not some you can change. There are confident men out there, who are more than ready for serious relations. To meet one just try changing the lake you fishing in. Or like its been said when you really stop looking for him, he will find you.
2006-10-13 05:36:55 · answer #5 · answered by JennieJen01 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, it isn't you. You just have to get your men from different places. As well, you shouldn't commit yourself too quickly, play the dating game and keep your emotions on an even setting until a relationship can take hold on it's own for both of you.
2006-10-13 05:39:25 · answer #6 · answered by storyteller 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It would seem that if the same sort of circumtances continue that you either enjoy being in these type of relaionships...or are really insecure about not being in one...or you need to self-examine what you are looking for in a relationship. Time to change is now if you don't like what is happening.
2006-10-13 05:34:43 · answer #7 · answered by IGH3Rat 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no its not u.u just havnt met the right guy yet.this time think hard before falling for someone so that u wont get hurt.
2006-10-13 05:34:01 · answer #8 · answered by archie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
its not you... drop the losers and try to be alone for a while and see what happens.
2006-10-13 05:33:11 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
let everything be natural.perhaps they just not your cup of tea...
2006-10-13 05:34:48 · answer #10 · answered by jessy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋