One looks into it and says, "I know that face but I can't put a name to it", the other one looks in it and says, "Paddy, you fcuking eejit its me!"
2006-10-13 04:51:04 · 22 answers · asked by Canary Yellow 2 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
Hey, you know some of use Irish find paddy jokes racist and offensive, would you have told this joke with a different nationality e.g Pakistani. I doubt it !!
You'd be scarred to be labelled a bigot, so lay off stereotyping us Irish and use you head instead.
2006-10-13 05:19:19 · answer #1 · answered by smileyshovie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman all on a desert island. Been there a few weeks, when they come across a lamp. Fortunately, the lamp is of the magic variety and contains a genie. He pops out, and offers all three a wish. The Englishman says he wishes he was home with his family, and disappears. The Scotsman wishes he was he was at home with his family too. The Irishman, feeling very lonely, wishes his friends would come back.
BA DOOM TISH
eat yer heart out, Jimmy Carr, ya smug git.
2006-10-13 11:55:29 · answer #2 · answered by Dan 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Paddy moves to another part of Dublin and goes to the local bar, he asks the barmaid for three pints of stout to be poured all at once. He then drinks them all and leaves. He repeates this for several weeks and the locals and the barmaid get used to it. The barmaid, one night, asks him why he does this ritual of three beers all at once.
He replied, "oh I have a
brother Sean in Boston and a brother Michael in New York, I am drinking to them and they are doing the same over there for me". The barmaid smiled thinking this was very nice.
One day Paddy comes in and orders just two pints. There is a hush around the bar as the barmaid draws the two beer. She then furtively asked him, "Paddy, do you mind if I ask, has something happened to one of your brothers"?
Paddy smiled and replied, "oh no nothing like that they are fine, I just decided to quit drinking meself".
2006-10-13 12:06:53 · answer #3 · answered by kellring 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Two Irishmen, Patrick Murphy and Shawn O'Brian grew up together and were lifelong friends. But alas, Patrick developed cancer, and was dying. While on his deathbed, Patrick called to his buddy, Shawn, "O'Brian, come 'ere. I 'ave a request for ye." Shawn walked to his friend's bedside and kneels.
"Shawny ole boy, we've been friends all our lives, and now I'm leaving 'ere. I 'ave one last request fir ye to do."
O'Brian burst into tears, "Anything Patrick, anything ye wish. It's done."
"Well, under me bed is a box containing a bottle of the finest whiskey in all of Ireland. Bottled the year I was born it was. After I die, and they plant me in the ground, I want you to pour that fine whiskey over me grave so it might soak into me bones and I'll be able to enjoy it for all eternity."
O'Brian was overcome by the beauty and in the true Irish spirit of his friend's request, he asked, "Aye, tis a fine thing you ask of me, and I will pour the whiskey. But, might I strain it through me kidneys first?"
and for the Irish out there
Three guys, one Irish, one English, and one Scottish, are out walking along the beach together one day. They come across a lantern and a Genie pops out of it. "I will give you each one wish, that's three wishes in total", says the Genie.
The Scottish guy says, "I am a fisherman, my Dad's a fisherman, his Dad was a fisherman and my son will be one too. I want all the oceans full of fish for all eternity." So, with a blink of the Genie's eye FOOM! the oceans were teaming with fish.
The Englishman was amazed, so he said, "I want a wall around England, protecting her, so that no one will get in for all eternity." Again, with a blink of the Genie's eye POOF! there was a huge wall around England.
The Irishman asks, "I'm very curious. Please tell me more about this wall." The Genie explains, "well, it's about 150 feet high, 50 feet thick, protecting England so that nothing can get in or out."
The Irishman says, "Fill it up with water."
But please do know That I can not stand Notre Dame Fighting Irish Football team
2006-10-13 12:45:18 · answer #4 · answered by JohnRingold 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Brilliant, especially the eejit - I love that word, great joke, laughed out loud again
2006-10-13 12:19:02 · answer #5 · answered by Mandy T 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
to be sure to be sure, was it not that he had a strawberry growing out of his head and that paddy was looking for the cream that Mick the doctor put on it.
2006-10-13 12:35:02 · answer #6 · answered by kally_ stewart 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nice one giggled a lot, hope it doesn't reflect on all the Irish.
2006-10-13 12:00:49 · answer #7 · answered by brillo 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have offended more than just 2 Irish folk. Congrats.
2006-10-13 11:53:50 · answer #8 · answered by sooooo angry 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋
hey im irish why dont you use a race that no one cares about like.... BLONDES!!! hahaha im only joking that was a funny joke
2006-10-13 11:53:01 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Why is it always the Irish? Typically stereotyped !
2006-10-13 12:40:13 · answer #10 · answered by biggi 4 · 0⤊ 2⤋