I want to live together with my boyfriend. He is against living together without being married but is also not interested in being married to anyone since he doesn't want any kids. So, he suggested that should the apartment next to him become vacant and my oldest is in college next year, that I should be his neighbor. Then in 6 years, when my youngest is grown, he said that maybe we can live together. Does this sound good or bad? I really don't like this idea myself.
2006-10-13 02:57:19 · 25 answers · asked by cheerstoyou 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
If it doesn't feel right to you then don't do it. I think that is quite silly to do that. You would be spending more money as a couple paying for 2 apartments when you could live together. Doesn't seem like he is very much worth it.
2006-10-13 03:00:38 · answer #1 · answered by jessigirl00781 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Personally, I'd rather live in a completely different part of the city. I've never been able to stand living with anyone, my family included, but having my guy next door would still be stifling.
As for you, this idea of your boyfriend's seems OK. You don't have to live in the same apartment to be together. He does want you near him, at least.
2006-10-13 11:49:00 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Before, I'd dread to live with a boyfriend. Now, I've lived with mine for over 2 years and it's fine. I think that I rather live with him than next door cuz it's made us closer and improved our relationship. Regarding your situation, I think you should at least try to live together before you want to commit. It's important to know as much as you can from the person you will marry, and living with him will allow you to do that, see if he's tolerant, see if he's willing to give you some space or whether he still wants to spend lots of time wid ya even though you live together. What's the point of living in the apartment nxt to him? you'll spend most of the time in his place or vice versa. Also, if you guys break up, Do you really wanna be livng right next to him? I dont think thats a good idea, Maybe you should get a place close to him, but not next.
2006-10-13 10:02:50 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
He's just running in a circle without end my dear, he's really afraid of commitment and this won't have a happy end. If he doesn't want any kids and doesn't want to marry and doesn't want to live out of the marriage, how can you be sure he will change his mind after 6 years? Six years is a long, long time, honey... this man is just trying to cover the sun with his thumb... don't fall on his game.
2006-10-13 10:02:16 · answer #4 · answered by Ank 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
sorry, im not moving out yet...you see im the girl next door..lol (*smiles*)
wait a minute, he doesnt want to live together w/o marriage and doesnt want to get married coz he doesnt want kids?? why can he have all the fun, how about you? are you up to being neighbors during the day and "lovers" at night? i dont think thats fair for you but then its your call...dont forget you have a child to consider too, moving is not easy for them, they cant adapt easily to those around them not like adults, sometimes we even had a hard time too..that is only one of the cons...six years of leaving like this and theres no clear arrangement between you and him is such a big step to risk...are you willing to invest your time? also, what if you didnt click and had to seperate ways, would it not be awkward to see him every now and then...especially if he invites someone to his place? you cannot just drag your kid again and move out...
the pros can be; is that you will get closer and he might even consider wanting a family esp if he gets along pretty well with your kid, but thats a long way, men doesnt change their minds easily...if he loves you, he should offer some of his self to make you feel secure....we all need that, im sure now you are weighing things out but please look ahead...
why not try to ask him again if he can live with you when your child have already settled in having him around? if he doesn't agree then you keep yourselves to your proper places...separate place...yes you can still continue your relationship and see how it goes from there...at least you get to protect your child and at the same time doesnt have the hassle of moving to and from...be practical..
2006-10-13 22:18:06 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
first of all you are livint together now right?? and sharing current expensess now right? does he have any idea of what it will cost too pay rent on another place plus security, first last months rent furniture, and utilities?? is he this rich?? and movr out and become his nebighor the guy really nedss a reality check here, and you must sit around and play his nebighor for six years right. he expects you too go his for six years?? and he dosent want kids okay. it sounds like the kid is the problemm here not you or anything. if he cant adjust too the kid, let him move out for good!! bagggage and all hes making up cheap excusess, i dont think he likes kids, and cant admit it seriously, too bad, let him hit the highways this is, a scrweded up mess he has created and it comes to one thing--- the kid he cant handle ittt have him hit the highways out take your cheap excusees with you!!
2006-10-13 10:05:00 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like he just doesn't want to make that commitment at this point in time. How long have you been together? I don't want to get married, my b/f doesn't want to get married but we live together because it's silly to pay double the rent when we spend all of our time together. If you are unhappy with the "agreement" he posed, then maybe this relationship needs to come to an end. Relationships are 50/50, sounds like he isn"t being that way.
2006-10-13 10:01:54 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Ummmm to me thats a bunch of bullshit. If hes not ready to live with you now,,what makes you think he will be ready in 6 yrs??? Why would you even wait around to find out??? If you are ready to settle down and live with someone,,,find a man who wants the same thing. He just wants you next door to him so he can see what you are doing at all times. NOWAY. What if you break up and you are stuck living next door to him??? You really shouldnt do that in my opinion. Find another man who wants the same things outta life as you,,,,never wait around for a man!!!!
2006-10-13 10:02:12 · answer #8 · answered by michelle 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would definitely look for another person. This man seems to be to stricked. He looks like the type of person that would organize his pantry cans in order, etc. What is the issue about living together? is he religious? because if he is, then I am assuming you guys are not supposed to have sex either...
2006-10-13 10:14:10 · answer #9 · answered by gjmite 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well it depends on how long you have been with him. It sounds like he is just giving you false hope. Which it all depends on what you want in your life. Do you want to live with someone again and be married? Then if you do this is not the man you need to be with. You deserve to do what is best for you and makes you happy.
2006-10-13 10:01:48 · answer #10 · answered by yrunosy 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋