I am 16-years old and 8 weeks preg. I only just managed to get the courage to tell my guy (who I'm preg by), yesterday. As soon as I told him, he said, "Oh god, this is my fault." But he realized that he was going to be a daddy, and then came around to it. This morning, he proposed to me while we were waiting for the bus! It was kind of foggy, and he gave me this gorgeous ring. It was so romantic! I accepted him. I haven't told my parents yet, but my mom and dad got married at 16 and 17, so they should be okay with it. Should I have turned him down?
2006-10-13 01:42:20 · 22 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
sweetheart you are so young.. i dint think marriage is the answer, but he does need to be in your life and the baby's life... before you tell your parents that you are getting married, let them know you are pregnant...if they love you I'm sure, so they will support you..good luck hunni
2006-10-13 01:47:02 · answer #1 · answered by lila 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Wow, don't rush into anything. The baby at 16 is already a big step! I would suggest waiting a bit. Maybe plan to get married after the baby. Make some future plans. Figure out what you want. Do you plan on attending college? Finishing high school? What are your plans. Don't marry just because of a baby. That's a mistake. Marry for love. You have a child coming into the world that will need all of your love and attention first and foremost.
2006-10-13 08:47:24 · answer #2 · answered by PT&L 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Okay hon, here's my opinion based on experience.
You are 16 years old and at 16 I was just learning what love meant. I was also just learning about sex. If I had married the guy I was with at 16, it would have ended very badly. The questions that you HAVE to ask yourself for the sake of your happiness and the happiness of that little one inside of you is this..."If I wasn't pregnant, would I want to marry this man? Do I love him enough to look at him across the breakfast table every day for the rest of my life?"
You are young, and I am sure you hate hearing that...but you still have so many things to learn about relationships and what true love really means.
Please take it from me because I married a guy because I was pregnant. It lasted one year. I am now remarried, older and couldn't be happier.
Good Luck to you and don't let some of these answers bother you. You are young, but I'm sure you'll figure out what's best for you and that little one inside of you!
2006-10-13 11:32:19 · answer #3 · answered by martinaintexas 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
At 16, you are still developing in your emotions and still trying to figure out who you are. I think that it is not the time for you to get married. Even though you are pregnant, you still have your whole life ahead of you. Before you do anything, talk to your parents and seek their advice. Then think about what you want out of life academically and otherwise. if you come to the conclusion that you want to be married, then get your parents permission and get married, but if you have any doubts at all, you need to reconsider the situation. Make no mistake, marriage is tough and it is a full time job to keep your relationship going. Adding to that, you are gonna be a mother.
All I am saying is this, think about it long and hard and know that whatever decision you make, your life is gonna be changed because of it.
I wish you all the best.
2006-10-13 09:59:10 · answer #4 · answered by martini_40727 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am 25 years old and got engaged in June. I’m not gonna tell you what to do but I’m gonna give you some things to think about. I understand you’re pregnant and both of you think it’s the right thing for you all to get married but you have to think of what’s best for you and now your baby. I’m guessing this guy is in school since ya’ll were standing at the bus stop. There’s nothing wrong with being engaged but don’t be so quick to get married. Make sure this guy is able to take care of you mentally, physically and emotionally before you get married. At 17, I suggest have a long engagement. Since 17 is so young, you should take your time and make sure marriage is something both of you want-not just because you’re pregnant. At least wait until he can get a car before you get married. The way the economy is now-a college education is crucial and at least one of you need to obtain one is you’re gonna raise a family. Marriage is easy to get in but HARD to get out of. Make sure this is a decision both of you can live with. You don't want to be miserable the rest of your life or a divorcee at 20. Think about it. Also, see a counselor, a school counselor, religious counselor (pastor, priest, rabbi). For some 'premarital' counseling if you decide to go ahead with it. That’s my take on it-good luck.
2006-10-13 10:22:23 · answer #5 · answered by MsAqua 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
OK- first off, this is not the place to ask a question like this... your going to get lots of confusioned answers from people. My mother and father also were married at 17.... but times have changed. You need to sit down and talk to your mom because you are going to need a lot of help and support from her and your family. Your BF sounds like a great guy and is taking the right steps in securing your relationship.
Talk to your mom and ignore all the Jackars on here!
2006-10-13 10:25:50 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think you should follow your heart. I believe that you are young and that 16 is young to be getting married and be having a child but I don't believe that you are too young to be in love. I think if you love him then you should have said yes, but you should wait to get married. Have the child and settle down before getting married! I found the guy I am married too when I was in 10th grade in high school. We just got married this past summer and the wedding was beautiful, our families love each other and so do we. We knew what we wanted and went for it. I think you are giong to have some huge decisions to make at such a young age but your man is still with you and that says so much. If you love this man then you made the right choice. Have this child, love this child and support him/her with all your might.
2006-10-13 09:14:46 · answer #7 · answered by glitter3317 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
It's good to hear that he's taking responsibilty, so many men don't these days. Though "Oh God this is my fault" was probably not the best choice of words :P and makes me wonder if he has proposed just because he feels obligated. If you have an open relationship with your parents, it's probably best to discuss this with them.
2006-10-13 08:53:50 · answer #8 · answered by my brain hurts 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like a great guy, but I'm just afraid if you get married, you'll have more children before you grow up. :You could get married in name only to give the baby that respect, but you should still stay living with your parents. However, the best thing to do would be give the baby up for adoption so it has a chance at a good life.
For the future USE SOME SERIOUS BIRTH CONTROL
2006-10-13 08:46:55 · answer #9 · answered by rucirius 3 · 2⤊ 2⤋
Uh, touchy subject?
First off, at 16 you will have to have your parents permission to marry, legally.
Just b/c your parents married young doesn't mean they will be OK with it. I bet they were hopeful that you wouldn't make the same mistakes they did.
Just b/c you are pregnant doesn't mean you have to marry him. Odds are him marrying you not b/c he loves you, but b/c you're preggers won't make the relationship last.
Have you thought about giving the baby up for adoption? You won't be able to provide for it at 16.....
2006-10-13 10:55:30 · answer #10 · answered by Laura 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋