ForGuys to Answer Also- Be Honest ! Does Men like shy women ?

Question

I am 34 years old and i am a shy woman. I think if I just break out and be myself and don't worry about what others think of me then I could break this shyness. I think I have missed alot of opputunities to date men because they got the wrong signal from me. Meaning, I am shy when I go out to clubs and I am just terrified what men are thinking of me. I don't want to be shy like this but yet i don't want to be abrupt either. How am I going to meet anyone if I am to shy ? I get the looks at times that they are interested but I won't make the move either. I have to realize also, men can also be afraid to approach me also with a sense of shyness in them also. Plz Help ! I haven't dated anyone in a serious relationship for over 3 years.

Answer 1

I hope you don't mind a female answering this question as it caught my attention as i was equally in the same predicament. I was a very very shy lady who pratically ran away from guys, i couldn't look them in the face and i was so sensitive that if a guy unintentionally brushed my shoulders, i would shudder. One day, my first bf (who's an ex now), liked me so much and thought up ways of getting to me. He conversed with me and did every way just to make me talk to him. I truly liked him and so i began opening up. Then we began dating and i came out of my shell.

So, what am i saying. You just have to make an effort to converse with people especially those who share your interests then slowly expanding your horizons. You have to make a conscious effort to reduce your shyness. Its hard but you've gotta try. The only thing is that shyness can never be totally eradicated as i still have my moments.

As for guys liking it, well, it all depends. Some do and some like assertive women. But what works for them is that saying of ''a saint or a lady in the streets and a freak in the sheets.''

Answer 2

Looks like your shyness is caused by you worrying what others might think of you. How abt this:-
You cannot control what people think of you. And trying to control something that you can't will just cause you to suffer even more. Besides, when you are not being your own self, how can another person know the real you? The last thing you want is being with someone who thinks you are something other than yourself....unless you are not looking for a lasting relationship that is.
But i think it's natural for some ppl to be shy to strangers. I personally don't like shy girls. But i talk to them anyways...in an attempt to break them from their shyness. But after a few conversations and they continue to be shy then i just move on.

But to answer your direct question, unless you look cute being shy,NO.
This is purely my opinion though.

Answer 3

Well, there are people who think shy is cute, if they recognize it's being shy and not being disinterested (this can happen). I personally like a woman who is reserved, but willing to be aggresive when she wants to say she likes me. Men are looking for clues for a healthy woman just as much as women look for clues of healthy man.
I on the other hand, am a shy man, getting close to women is something I find very hard to do, so, I often have a lot of friendships but nothing close and personal. If you haven't had a date in three years try me, I haven't had one in five.
It's not that men don't like shy women, it's just that shyness can be misinterpreted.

Answer 4

There is absolutely nothing wrong with being shy. It can add some mystery and be very alluring at times. I would like to think of it less as shy, more as coy even. But you have to be confident in yourself. If you know you are great (which is seems like you do) then you need to show everyone else you know. This does not mean being cocky (big turnoff). It means having that look, that smile that says "I am someone you should want to know". Guys will be attracted to that, even if you never approach the first one.

Now you have to evaluate your attitude when you go out. Unfortunately a club/bar scene is superficial. That is not to say you cannot meet good people there, but people approach each other based off of looks and not interests, attitude, or intillect. You will have to develop a style that attracts a guy to want to come to you without appearing slutty and can still me coy. Guys do not like rejection any more than women. Most men will not approach a woman who is not giving off some signal of interest. Most guys are not real subtle. They will look at you for a while if interested, they may pretend to play it off but this is the guy's way of feeling out the situation. All you have to do to get approached is "get caught" looking back, maybe a quick smile. This should be all the encouragement a guy needs to approach. Then you can still be your normal self, reserved, and see what he is like. You still have to show some interest though, or the guy will not take the chance.

If you are not having a lot of luck in the club scene, have you tried online? I know there is a stigma, but in today's age it is very practical. You get the opportunity to "meet" and get to know someone well before you ever meet. In a lot of ways it is almost less superficial than a club scene. Also see if your friends have anyone to set you up with. I know this also has its stigmas, but it could work. I met my wife through a mutual friend, and she actually lived out of state at the time. We did the long distance thing for a while, and really got to know each other. In today's society, distance is somthing that can be overcome fairly easily, so keep your options open and remember that when you know you are worth it, others will too. Good luck...

Answer 5

Some guys like shy women,
but You have to open up.

Answer 6

there's a difference between being shy and being scared. you're being scared. STOP! you had it right in the first sentence or two... don't worry so much about what men will think of you. i love a woman who is confident. believe it or not, someone will like you. and if you can use your shyness to communicate that you are "innocent" in a seductive kind of way, men will flock to you the way little kids flock to the ice cream truck.

Answer 7

It's not that guys don't like shy girls... it's more like we tend not to notice them as quickly because they don't stand out....

remember that guys are very shy and insecure too so the more confident girls can pretty much take their pick cuz we'll respond to anyone who comes and talks with us...

Answer 8

I like shy girls. Lots of guys are shy too. But it is traditionally their job to get over their shyness and make the first move. If you can manage to flash them a quick smile it might be enough to encourage them to come over and talk to you...

Answer 9

LISTEN! if u r not insecure about your looks then b patient and n the meantime talk 2 me (as a friend) k. everything u stated is correct so i know youre not stupid. theres absolutely nothing wrong with being a quiet person but being shy is personality thing that needs 2 b changed and something tells me youre going to do it. fill free 2 chat with me about this if u want k, [e-mail]. take care

Answer 10

Well, first of all, he’s too humble to know he’s perfect. He’s intelligent, supportive, funny. He’s romantic and courageous. He’s got a good body, but he doesn’t have to look in the mirror every two minutes. He’s kind, sensitive, and gentle. He’s not afraid to cry in front of me. He likes animals, children, and he’ll change poopy diapers. He plays an instrument, and he loves his mother.