Im 16, and have been a Wiccan for 3 years now, and studying for 4. I want to tell my parents that I am Wiccan but they are Concervative Christian and I asked my mom what she would do if one of her children were of a differnt religion, she said she wouldnt let them. But saying one thing and Doing another is 2 differnt things. I wouldnt change my lifestyle or act any differnt, just stop having to be so secrect about it. How can I tell them?
2006-10-12 17:35:27 · 15 answers · asked by Jimmi H 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Your parents will see this as a threat. As conservative christians they see wiccan = witch = enemy of god. Try to minimize the threat as much as possible.
When you talk to mom, be very loving. Tell her "I love you" a lot and remind her that you respect her. Also, try to go slowly. Rather than bursting out with "I'm a wiccan" describe two of three of your beliefs without "labeling" them. This won't seem as threatening to her, yet you can still be honest about what you believe. Tell her what you just told us "I've believed this way for years and it doesn't change my lifestyle, my values or what I feel about my family."
Also, it might help to...tell her "I know you respect me mom and would never FORCE your beliefs on me." Even if its not true, excatly, I found that when I kept telling my parents that they respected me, they actually turned around and started ... respecting me.
At your age, I wouldn't "hide" what you believe anymore. There's nothing to be ashamed of - why should you? On the other hand, "going slowly" as you come out of the wiccan closet will be easiest on your relationship.
Best wishes to you
2006-10-12 17:43:45 · answer #1 · answered by Black Parade Billie 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You do have an interesting situation. Although I'm curious as you say you're not changing your lifestyle yet your parents are not aware of your beliefs. Either you're really able to camoflage yourself or your parents may be a little more knowledgeable of the situation than you're aware of. In any case, there are a few ways that may be of help.
1. Your mom said she wouldn't let one of her children follow another religion. You're already doing so. Sitting down with your parents, preferably with someone who already knows about you and whom your parents respect, and telling them is the simpest yet hardest way.
2. Gradually come out of the broom closet (sorry, old joke) and wait for them to ask about something, anything. Rather than you dropping your beliefs on them, their questions can be a way of opening a conversation with them.
3. As mentioned before, stay under cover until you have the chance to move out of the house. This is not the way that you want to go but if you're worried about hurting their feelings, waiting until you go to college or some other event takes place may be the kindest way of all.
Threefold blessings on you in any case.
2006-10-12 18:11:18 · answer #2 · answered by eriurana 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Bring it up slowly and carefully. If your parents are religious, then a slow approach is best. Don't keep it in the closet forever, but don't advertise it. Be proud, but not too proud. There is still a lot of hate for the Wiccan community, especially from extremely religious Christians and Muslims.
2016-03-28 07:09:01 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You sit down with them both and tell them you respect thier religion, but that is their choise of religion ,and you chose a different one. there is no way your mom or dad can not let you be the religion you want or change your beliefs no matter how hard they try. And eventually you will be over 16 and you have a mind of your own. Who knows you might change it.
2006-10-12 18:02:47 · answer #4 · answered by englishgal11 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hun I am sorry to have to break this to you but you are not Wicca, Wicca is an oath-bound initiate-only mystery priesthood, without initiation you are not part of the priesthood and you cannot know the beliefs, practices, doctrines, mysteries or gods that make up the fundamentals of Wicca let alone be Wicca yourself because all the things that make up the basis of Wicca are oath-bound meaning that they do not teach them to people who are not Wicca themselves.
You need to learn about Wicca before you decide to become Wicca, you also need to be aware that in misrepresenting yourself as Wicca you may highly offend people who are Wicca and it also means you are misrepresenting Wicca to others.
Wicca generally do not initiate under 18's because often young people are trying to find themselves so may convert half way through their training, training often requires you to put your life on hold and many Seekers find themselves having to move home in order to train. Younger people often find it harder to understand the philosophies involved in Wicca and the utmost impotence in keeping their oaths within Wicca, also younger implies fewer years studying Wicca and very few people go into a coven without at least ten years of self-study under their belts.
Legal issues are also a big problem, because Wicca involves ritual nudity, sexual rituals and alcohol consumption all within an oath-bound setting it means they have to protect themselves from parents angry/suspicious of the idea of a load of adults doing secretive things with naked minors but also to protect Seekers as no good coven will take on minors simply because of the risk of paedophiles trying to use Wicca as a means of child abuse.
Until you find your true path and true beliefs just keep looking to find what is best for you, your parents don't need to know what your beliefs are until you are ready to tell them and when you do simply explain to them what you believe and ask them to respect that decision. They are your parents they are not going to give you a hard time about your beliefs, if you think they will then wait until a time when it is not going to be an issue such as when you move into your own home, either way they can't change your beliefs any more than you can change theirs.
2006-10-13 06:06:32 · answer #5 · answered by Kasha 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Good question. My parents don't like it either. I really don't discuss it much with them, but I did set boundaries about them forcing their religion on me, and that helped. It may be best to deal with this when you are over 18. Practice your own faith, but save yourself the grief right now at your age, if it is possible. It is definitely unfair and sad that many people automatically assume that Wiccan people practice evil. If only they knew our only intention is love and to harm none!! Good luck to you dear one.
2006-10-12 17:56:56 · answer #6 · answered by Cub6265 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
if you feel that it's going to jepordize the relationship with your parents and you love them please don't tell unless they ask. but when I told my mom and day that I was gay they accepted me as I was, so what I'm really trying to say is that if they love you for you and not what you do they will continue on doing so
2006-10-12 17:40:08 · answer #7 · answered by ray ray 1 · 3⤊ 0⤋
tell them when your 18! lol your then an adult and what can they do! Oh wait nothing so whats the problem again?
2006-10-12 17:37:43 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Tell them the same way you told us.
2006-10-12 17:37:33 · answer #9 · answered by master_der_man 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hmmmm.... maybe you should go to their pastor first, and ask him for advice on how to tell your parents.
For what its worth, I think you would be much better off being a christian and honoring your parents.
2006-10-12 21:15:13 · answer #10 · answered by Harvie Ruth 5 · 0⤊ 3⤋