As a former size 3, now 40 pounds heavier, I receive daily comments from my family, husband, and neigbors that tell me to lose weight, that they want to see me as they saw me before. Although, I really want to loose the weight and again be thin, a part of me doesn't want to. I want them to love me for who I am. Any suggestions?? Thanks.
2006-10-12 17:15:16 · 14 answers · asked by R21 2 in Health ➔ Diet & Fitness
TELL THEM THAT BUT IF U WANT TO LOOSE WEIGHT FOR YOURSELF THEN ONLY DO IT FOR YOURSELF NOT ANY ONE ELSE!!
U WONT LOOSE THE WEIGHT IF U HAV NO CONVEDIENCE IN IT! ONLY LOOSE IT FOR YOURSELF!!!!!
2006-10-12 17:18:39 · answer #1 · answered by BeautyQueen 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Having been in that same situation, here is what you should do:
Ask them point blank if they have a problem loving you in a bigger size - and if they do, tell them to hit the road because you don't need those kind of people in your life. Be very loud and vocal about this, and make them realize that this is how they are making you feel.
As for your husband, tell him you're going to lose the weight alright, because you need to be thin to find your next husband - the one who will be more sensitive to your feelings and your needs.
Now, as for your weight, if it is making YOU unhappy, do something about it - but do it because it's for YOU, not for THEM or anyone else. As long as you are clear about that in your own mind, nothing anyone else thinks will really matter.
2006-10-12 17:26:10 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
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2016-12-13 07:23:12 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is a great question, and I sure wish I knew the answer to it. I'd say, the best you can do is to perhaps rethink those people's places in your life. Not saying to get a divorce, but what those people are doing is a sign of who they are--it just may not have surfaced until they felt "justified" or "safe" in showing their hand. All information is valuable. Maybe the next time somebody makes such a comment you could say something like, "And here I thought you liked me for me. Thanks for the heads up." Watch them backpedal like crazy and start spouting things like, "I'm just concerned for your health/happiness/longevity!" Yeahright. Maybe I missed that issue of the Journal of Medicine, but as far as I know, insulting, demeaning, and devaluing a person doesn't do a whole lot to improve or safeguard their health, happiness, or lifespan.
2006-10-12 17:48:06 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its not about them 'accepting' you as much as them wanting the best for you. I think you already know this. But YOU need to realize the person it will most affect is #1..you. If your already nicely fit and toned, then don't worry about it. If you arent, losing will make you look better, feel better and be healthier.
If that fact, plus pleadings from the people that love you most don't motivate you, then nothing will.
2006-10-12 17:29:59 · answer #5 · answered by xoxo 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This question is more mental than anything. Is the cup half full or empty? My wife recently lost a friend due to a heart attack. She was grossly overweight. Its a sentiment that a lot of BBW have...I want them to love me for who I am....or I ll do it MY WAY. Is it really that hard to say....gee....youre right...thinner is not only being more attractive but it is really HEALTHIER.
Keep in mind, once youre back to your previous size, you can wear the ugliest clothes and hairdos to see if they really love you anyway.
I know if my wife die of a heart attack, I ll be a big mess for a long time.
2006-10-12 17:34:22 · answer #6 · answered by rokdude5 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tell everyone to not talk about your weight with you. Tell them you want to lose the weight for yourself and you are feeling too much pressure from them. If they were told that you will lose the weight only after they stop talking about it, maybe they will zip it!
2006-10-12 17:28:32 · answer #7 · answered by Cathy W 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey you have to be comfortable in your own skin and if being a little thicker makes you feel good than listen to your inner voice. women always want to please others but when it comes to your body, you need to be the one in control. Explain to others that you feel more healthy like this and to please stop hastling you. I think size 3 is way to small for anybody anyways. I used to be 105 and now weigh 139 and honesltly I am so much happier about how I look.
2006-10-12 17:25:45 · answer #8 · answered by l'il mama 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hi OK here goes i'll give u my thought u should not loose weight just coz people think ur not in good shape.it all matters on how u think of urself .mabe u can have a bit of time for exercise and mabe u will feel better about urself trust me on this i suffer from a eating disorder and it really doesn't matter what people think of u if ur happy it's all good
2006-10-12 17:28:20 · answer #9 · answered by Devage J 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Read some very effective weight loss tips and more on this site to help you http://lose-weight-lose-inches.blogspot.com/
this will help you- useful tips
oh sorry i did not read your whole q you are right i think if you gana show them that your happy how you are they will accept that
2006-10-12 17:21:05 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋