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our daughter have been a drug addict for 18 years; she had 2 bad episodes in the last 5 years.
the last time she was in the hospital was 11-2002 with a intractranial bleeding/hemorrhagic stroke. she was in critical condition for nearly a year; we took her and her 13 year son home and we nurtured her back to health. We just found out she is doing drugs again; we are thinking of cutting her off completelly from our lives; since she continue to lie to us
and deceive us. we are too tired of
the dramma. our question is:
should we cut her off our lives???
Father and Mother

2006-10-12 16:00:41 · 21 answers · asked by COCO 4 in Health Diseases & Conditions Other - Diseases

21 answers

I know that it is hard to accept but she is a drug addict and will always be no matter what, unless of course you commit her to a hospital or something, and you are her parents so no matter how hard things get and how mad you get at her for wanting her to do right she will still be your daughter and you will still have to just look past all of the bad and try to guide her the best you can. I wish you the best of luck and I am very sorry to hear your situation. It's a viscous, never- ending cycle. I think the best thing you could do is to make sure her son gets the childhood he deserves sinces he did not ask to be brouight into all that.

2006-10-12 16:08:41 · answer #1 · answered by Jlove24 2 · 2 0

I think that you should definitely NOT cut her from your lives. I understand that you might feel embarrassed and worried for her. I think talking to her is your best bet. Here are some pointers on how to get the most out of her so that you can help: 1. Talk to her from a point of view as if you don't really care. You're just trying to make polite conversation. (Ex: Asking a friend of yours about there hobbies) Sound interested. 2. Ask her if she enjoys that feeling that she gets when she does drugs, and why does she do it? 3. Remind her of the son she has. Explain to her that this little boy is looking up to her, and soon he will need some guidance. If she is embarrassed by her actions and she doesn't want him to follow in her footsteps, then she needs to get a grip. That is the only way that he won't try it later, and use the excuse, "Well you did it Mom."

I certainly hope this helps. Just remember, don't cut her off from your lives. If you love her and your grandson, then you won't want to permantly damage that relationship. good luck!

2006-10-12 16:19:00 · answer #2 · answered by lmead06 2 · 0 0

Lying and deceiving is what drug addicts do. Your efforts should be directed to getting her into a Drug Rehabilitation Program that will actually handle her addiction.
I recommend the NARCONON Program. I have personally worked with this program it doesn't just handle addiction it gives the person a new life. Something effective can be done about addiction.
I would only cut her out of your lives if you can't get her agreement to get proper help, and even then leave the door open slightly incase she changes her mind.

2006-10-12 16:39:25 · answer #3 · answered by thetaalways 6 · 0 0

Please, do not.

Your daughter lies to you and deceives you not because she does not love you or because she is bad, she has no control over herself - the drugs control her. I know it is very hard to carry this kind of burden but believe me she needs you. She needs your love and caring. And understanding.

That does not mean that you should leave your valuables where she can find them. Trust me, the drug addict would steal the mother's wedding band and then not only deny it but would try to help to find it. And at the same time would feel shame and regret.

Try to get the best help for your daughter and stick by her. Regardless of how much she hurt you if something happens to her you will only remember the good. And the sorrow and the emptiness will be immense.

2006-10-12 16:25:56 · answer #4 · answered by oksana_rossi 3 · 0 0

I think you're living every parents worse nightmare. I wish there was an answer to this question, but there is not. All I can say is that I wish you the best of luck. Take care of the grandson; your daughter will either come around or not. That's her decision. I just hope she's able to make the right choice. God Bless you.

2006-10-12 16:14:01 · answer #5 · answered by S 5 · 0 0

it extremely is very unlawful, notably in the state of California. Your daughter is 15 years old; that may't have/be in a dating with somebody who's the a while of 18 and up. If she is the age of 17, with the mothers and dads consent, she will have or be in a dating with somebody who's greater in age. that he's homeless and stole $2500 properly worth of your assets; he can definitely manage her to do worse issues that may lead her to trial as an grownup and can be sent to reformatory or penal complex. If the technique will strengthen, he can get her to run away with him and can carry approximately extra issues for her and her kin. a million) criminal interest 2) Rape/homicide (to her or others) 3) theft 4) turning out to be to be homeless and dying from chilly and starvation could take place it extremely is going to be smart to the two A) call the police and make a checklist, or B) rigidity her to not be with him or C) the two A and B. careful, by way of fact he may be risky, yet on my own if she is having sexual family with this guy he could have illnesses and/or infections. call your city hall/Police for extra counsel, or bypass onto a internet site. discover and learn rules of your city/state.

2016-10-16 03:30:35 · answer #6 · answered by ? 4 · 0 0

Unfortunately, I think you have to cut her off. You love her, so it will be so hard, but she needs to hit rock bottom in order to come up. By cutting yourself, your husband, and her son out of her life will really shock her. You are enabling her right now, and although it will be tough, it might be a much needed break for you all as well. She is your daughter, and this will hopefully only be a temporay break in your relationship. It can only improve. You need to take away the ones she loves most but hurts the most(including you), out of the picture for awhile to make her want to change. Stand tall and know that you have already done the best you can do for her. I wish you all well!

2006-10-12 16:18:30 · answer #7 · answered by DBL L 2 · 0 1

Yes,I know yall love her but it's too late she's already back to the way she use to be.If I were you 2 just take her son and let her be.She needs tough love not love that she thinks it's ok to do drugs.Then that way you 2 won't talk to her and support her habit,cut her loose with not a penny at all cuz she will use it to get drugs.And don't have anything in her sight that is valuable to her to get it.And I wish you your husband and grandson can overcome this tragic moment,and hope your daughter gets the help that she deserves.I give my sympathy to you and your family.

2006-10-12 16:12:40 · answer #8 · answered by Sister Queen Mama 3 · 0 0

Be careful about choosing to cut your daughter out. You said she has a son...do you really want to risk not seeing your grandson ever again?

Threatening it would be what I think is the best place to start. Let her know that you disapprove of what she is doing, and you do not want that kind of presense in your life. Encourage her to get help; hold an intervention.

Only when everything else fails should you even consider cutting her out of your life.

2006-10-12 16:04:58 · answer #9 · answered by analystdevil 3 · 0 0

no you should not.. being a semi recovered drug user, when my parents cut me off it only made me worse which led to me spending my share of time in icu.. i can remember the feelings of hate raging throughout my body when i asked for help, even though i know i really didnt want it, but i feel like if they would have helped me i would not have ended up in the hospital. but since ther is a child involved you most definatley need to help her now more than ever.. when people are using, they are not in thier right state of mind and will do monstous things to themselves and the ones they love the most not really knowing what it is they are doing.. dont let her end up like i almost did and the way my best friend did... in a ditch somewhere in the middle of no mans land because she has a problem and needs help.. please.. from one parent to another..

2006-10-12 16:13:21 · answer #10 · answered by sammi_jjp 1 · 0 0

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