My girlfriend wants to have kids and I defineatly do not. I mean I like kids, but they are just too annoying for me to handle one of my own. How can I decently and respectfully say no?
2006-10-12 14:50:25 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Other - Pregnancy & Parenting
tell the ***** like it is
2006-10-12 15:28:05 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
This is something that you should be direct and honest about. Don't leave any room for her to think you might change your mind somewhere down the line if you are sure that you won't. You don't have to defend your position; it just the way things are for you. She shouldn't need to defend her position either. She will need to decide if it's worth giving up kids to be with you. Be sure you both understand that's what's at stake.
Don't have sex if you don't want kids. Unless you go for a more permanent solution, no birth control is 100% effective.
2006-10-12 22:04:44 · answer #2 · answered by happygirl 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You better be honest with her, because this is a serious subject for someone who really wants to be a mother. I would let her know your thoughts on the subject, and give her the choice of staying with you or not. I'm afraid if she makes her decision based on what you want, she will resent you in the future. Talk it out, perhaps a few years from now you will change your mind.
2006-10-12 22:26:32 · answer #3 · answered by june clever 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would just nicely tell her you thoughts and feelings and if you really don't want kids you should not have kids. Do not let her talk you into it or make you feel guilty because people that really don't want children usually don't make the best parents and it is great that you know it is not for you. Good Luck!
2006-10-12 21:55:47 · answer #4 · answered by Sakora 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I applaud you for recognizing that you do not want kids now. Just tell your friend the truth, that right at this time in your life, children are not a priority. Compliment your friend " I know that you would be a great mom, but you and I are different and I know I am not ready for kids."
2006-10-12 22:01:13 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
For starters, STOP HAVING SEX.
If she's determined enough to get pregnant, she's determined enough to sabotage any form of birth control you'll use. If you don't want a kid, this is the easiest and quickest way to determine that she won't get pregnant.
You just need to tell her how you feel about it. You may be "dating," but that's certainly not a commitment worthy of bringing a child into. You have to make sure your finances are at least somewhat in order. You need to make sure you have a good, clean place to live. And you need to make sure that you are willing to dedicate EVERY waking moment of your existence to that baby once it gets here. If you're not willing to do that, you owe it not only to her but to yourself to be as honest as possible now, before she's pregnant and it's too late.
2006-10-12 21:56:09 · answer #6 · answered by Luann 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You have to be honest with her about your feelings also when you do she may think you may change your mind one day so to make your point very clear my I suggest a vasectomy? If that doesn't get your message clearly to her then nothing will so you just have to let her go and get with someone who feels just the way you do about children.
2006-10-12 22:04:21 · answer #7 · answered by po8t1 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just tell her..be honest that is the best. However, wait a little you may feel diff as you get older, just let her know that. I dont think they would be as annoying to you though if they were your own..but you never know.
2006-10-12 22:05:14 · answer #8 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Personally i think that is something to be discussed at the beggining before things become to serious. Having said that, i think you should just lay it on the line... nothing beats honesty. You HAVE to tell her how you feel, now before it gets really late!!
2006-10-12 21:59:01 · answer #9 · answered by Romy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you truely don't want kids then you need to tell her. It may be time to end that relationship and allow her to get on with finding someone who does
2006-10-13 00:25:44 · answer #10 · answered by Rachel 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be honest, but be tactful. Tell her that you just don't ever see yourself with kids. Be nice! But be honest. It would suck to loose her, but that's just not something you can compramise on. Good luck!
2006-10-12 22:05:32 · answer #11 · answered by Melissa, That's me! 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋