What do you think about hiring a male nanny or babysitter. What do you think about this situation: My neighbor has an 18 month old son and the other day I was talking to her about what she does for time away from her child. She said that she has a friend who has a 14 year old son and that he "loves" her little boy. She went on to tell me that the 14 year old always calls and asks her to take the boy for a while to the park or something. She doesn't pay him!! When she told me that it just made me cringe because why would a 14 year old boy want to spend all his time with an 18 month old baby for free. Now I know this is none of my business but I just want to know what other parents think about this or a situation similar to this. Would you hire a male nanny/babysitter?
2006-10-12 12:52:25 · 17 answers · asked by I smile because of them ♥ 5 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Toddler & Preschooler
As for my opinion I would never leave my daughter with a male. I know that women can do the same things that men can but I just feel more comfortable leaving her with a responsible woman with children.
2006-10-12 12:57:14 · update #1
You are right that is weird, that a 14 year-old kid wants to spent time with a baby and with out getting pay. I have 2 kids, a 5 year-old boy and a 1 year-old girl and the only people that can take care of them is my mom, my sister- in-law, my husband and that is it.
2006-10-12 12:58:25 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
It would depend on the guy - and I'd have to know him pretty well. When my daughter was born (she's 4 now) the neighbor's 10-year old told me he wanted to babysit. At that point I wouldn't have said yes because he was 10 and she was a baby. I'd probably by OK with him now that they're both a bit older.
Here's a "what were they thinking" story though. I have a male friend who's now in his 40's. He used to babysit as a teenager. When he was 17 a couple he had not met before hired him to take care of their 6-week old and WENT AWAY FOR THE WEEKEND. Nothing bad happened, but he said he didn't realize what a truly bad idea this was until 12 years later when his own son was born.
2006-10-12 16:02:47 · answer #2 · answered by sdc_99 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm not sure what to say about the 14 yr old boy except when I watched this little girl they had a neighbor with 3 boys and they loved to help with her. I didn't see anything wrong with it, but then again I was always there.
As for any man at all, I just don't agree and think it's a little over the top. There is a male that works at the day care I work at and he is great with the kids. I also dated a guy that was the head counselor at the summer day camp/after-school program in my area and he was also great with the kids. Lighten up a bit.
2006-10-12 14:13:21 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Goodness, I feel sorry for men. Automatically they are assumed to be pedophiles just because they are men? That is ridiculous. I hope none of you are leaving your children home with their dads if you're that worried about men.
We use a male babysitter. He is the best sitter we've had. He is only 13 but they live right near us. His mom is a good friend of mine and she is usually home. So, if he has any issues he can call my cell phone or call his mom and she is right there. He is better than our last sitter. She was a 22 yr. old and she was lazy. I'd come home to find the house trashed and she'd usually be asleep on my couch. Our current sitter cleans up his messes, encourages the kids to clean up their messes and he interacts with them the entire time he is here. He doesn't just plop himself down in front of the tv. He plays video games, board games, they color together, etc. My children adore him.
The situation you describe is somewhat different because he isn't getting paid so you have to wonder what his motivation is. Well, it could be that he really likes kids. When I was 14 I spent time with a lot of little kids that were the kids of family friends. I liked being around kids and they liked being around me. I didn't always gets paid. Is that okay because I'm female but would be seen as different if I were male?
What is this kid like? Is he overly popular? Maybe he doesn't have a whole lot else to do. Maybe he doesn't have a lot of friends. Maybe he enjoys taking the kid to the park. Maybe he likes helping out. Maybe your friend is exaggerating and he doesn't do it as often as she is making out. There is a lot to consider about this situation. You have no information to go on and yet you automatically jump to suspicion. Why? Because he is a boy? If your friend had said it was a female would you have thought twice?
I realize that there are a lot of creeps out there and most pedophiles are men but that does not mean that most men are pedophiles.
Edited to add: my husband told me he had a female babysitter when he was a kid. She would encourage him and his brother to strip naked and wrestle like the romans did. She would sit and watch. They did it once because they were really young and thought that would be fun. But she would try to get them to do it every time. They never wanted to and they never did it again but she'd always ask and always get upset when they wouldn't do it. So, it isn't always males you have to look out for.
2006-10-12 13:21:42 · answer #4 · answered by Amelia 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The only male babysitters I would hire are a select few of mine and my husbands family. That also goes the same for females though. These days more and more women are sick in the head. But, as far as the story, yeah, it sound pretty fishy. Why would anyone chose to and be so into babysitting a child, especially for free?
2006-10-12 13:05:02 · answer #5 · answered by Violet 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How did the fourteen year old meet the child? Did he used to babysit him or something? If so, sometimes it's normal for them to go back and visit; I know I still talk to and sometimes go places with the children I babysit. I also know quite a few boys who are sensitive and can't wait to be a father; several of them hang out with their much younger nieces just because they like children.
On the other hand, if it's just out of the blue, something might be going on that just isn't right. If you're that worried, maybe you should ask the mother what she thinks of it, and how she knows the fourteen year old.
As far as hiring a male nanny, what on earth does this have to do with this situation? I would hire one if he seemed capable of taking care of my child, no problem; I don't judge by gender but by individual.
2006-10-12 12:56:29 · answer #6 · answered by laughmyselftosleep 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would be happy to hire a male sitter but I would feel the need to find out a little or lot about him. In your situation maybe he is hoping at some point she will start to pay him or maybe it is something a little worse. I just know i am fine with a male sitter as long as he has the proper credentials!
2006-10-12 12:59:34 · answer #7 · answered by Tetsi 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have a friend with 3 teenage boys, all of them babysit for money and I would trust any of them with my children. The oldest likes to take my 3 year old to the park when I visit with his mom. He told me that it attracts girls! Teen boys are not stupid, being out in public with a baby or small child is a huge chick magnet!
2006-10-12 13:18:41 · answer #8 · answered by PLDFK 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
statistically, men are more likely than women to be pedophiles. background check the hell out of a guy before you do. i'm not above the nanny cam for men and women alike. i'm very particular with my child. i'd have some specific instructions for a sitter and i guess would like to know if she or he blatently disregards my wishes.
2006-10-12 13:02:05 · answer #9 · answered by practicalwizard 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds a little fishy to me... I have a 4 year old son and I wouldn't trust him to the care of a minor.
2006-10-12 12:55:13 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋