Im 17 years old, my boyfriend is 21. We've been going out for 5 months now, but we've known eachother for almost 2 years, and thats how long we've liked eachother. lately we have been hanging out and everytime we hang out we end up getting heated up, 2 time we've ended up in his bed, I've been really scared because I'm still a virgin and so is he, but honestly the only thing thats stops us from going all the way is that we both know that it's wrong in the eyes of God, but everytime it gets harder and harder to resist. I know that maybe we should avoid bein in private places by oursleves we dont wanna go out with people from church because they tend to make the worst rumors up, and i dont have much other friend neither does he. and my parents approve of our relationship, but they dont like it when we go out alone, I love this guy and I pray every night he is the man i share the rest of my life with, it scares me that i feel ready to cross the line, but we both wanna keep our testimony.
2006-10-12 09:51:17 · 18 answers · asked by mizz boriqa 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
You are at an age when your hormones are at their peak and trying to avoid sex because of delusional superstitious beliefs that have their roots deep in the past and were created by men who thought the world was flat and disease is caused by demons, is unrealistic. See your doctor, get appropriate birth control and stick to your one partner. Have fun learning how to please each other and think about chucking your silly gods out the door, they don't exist anyway.
2006-10-12 10:08:13 · answer #1 · answered by iknowtruthismine 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well the fact that you are thinking about sex is pretty normal, but it is something everyone has to deal with. It's good that you are concerned about it.
The truth is, yes, having sex before marriage is a sin (so are lustful thoughts), but you know that. I also don't have to tell you that if you do it you'll regret it.
But that's not all there is to it. Most people focus on how wrong it is to have sex out side of marriage (which it is) but they don't pay attention to the other side. That is that sex solely in marriage is one of the most awesome things you can experience. Not only that, but the fact that you and he are both virgins now makes it all the better. If you both do wait, you will have the best thing you can possibly give your husband, yourself. Likewise you will have all of him! You have no idea how awesome that is and how much it will bring you and him closer together. Not only that, but the sex is better and completely guilt free! What people fail to realize is that God didn't command us to wait for marriage to punish us or take awway anything. He did it because He wants us to know one of the greatest gifts He has given us in it's fullness. When we don't wait, we only take away from it and cheat ourselves. So count your blessings that you and he both have not made a mistake yet. Trust me it will be more than worth the wait.
In the meantime, definately avoid being alone together. Also you both might want to consider fining accountability partners (guy/guy, girl/girl). An accountability partner is someone you trust who can help suport and encourage you to wait. Also continue to pray to avoid the temptation. (It will only get harder as time goes on so be prayerful). Do whatever it takes to wait. You don't know what you're missing, but trust me it's more than worth the wait!!!
Many blessings.
2006-10-13 16:44:23 · answer #2 · answered by Consuming Fire 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wait a couple more months... Think about marraige until then. Are you Ready to marry this man? Did God truly bring you two together?(Did he bring you to him?)Gen. 2:22-24 explains how you must treat marriage. In fact, dating should be out of the question until God sends a man to you. But, one thing is for sure.
Run from temptation. You SHOULD go out with friends from church, and if they start rumors, how different are you in God's eyes? The Bible says that when you do good and suffer wrongly, It is better than to do bad and suffer justly.(forgive the paraphrasing.)
2006-10-12 17:01:58 · answer #3 · answered by Levi G 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
1st you are only 17 your still a baby-you may not like hearing that but its true--if you were a mom and had a 17 year old daughter would you approve of what your doing--hold out so you can tell your kids you took the high road-and because it is what god wants you to do
dont put yourself into situations in which things can get heated up go to the park have dinner with your family hang out with friends--you have the rest of your life to have sex--you can wait till your married
and if really loves you he will want you to wait--it will be so much more special if you do---trust me i made those mistakes and i regret it everyday
2006-10-12 16:58:11 · answer #4 · answered by tiff 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you are only 17. Do not rush into things. I know it is not easy.
Religion has nothing to do with it. Keep religion out of your life.
but live your life with integrity. what ever you do in or with your life. you will have to live with it for the rest of your life. ask your self the question. Am i doing the right thing. deep down you know the answer. just do the right thing for YOU. not for a religious
thing. Oh by the way you are not wrong about thinking about sex. You are a human being. you have a human right to feel and be open and true to your feelings.
2006-10-12 17:01:25 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Fighting temptation is a tremendous task, but a necessary one.
If you really want to please God then you'll refrain from sexual encounters. Kissing is alright but it's playing with fire and you don't want to get burned. My suggestion to you would be that you and your boyfriend always make sure that theirs always another person in the house while you two are together. Never be alone except for when it's impossible not to be. Have a accountability partner, someone you can trust and knows what your going through. Make sure they know that you don't want to go too far with this guy and have them give you pointers.
Remember, the greatest gift someone can give their partner in marriage is their purity.
2006-10-12 17:00:47 · answer #6 · answered by stpolycarp77 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds to me its the good old fasion raging teenager hormones your not wrong for thinking it because believe it or not many people seriously contemplate to do it or not but my opinion which probabley does not matter is wait until marriage its so worth it! But No your thoughts are only natural but just try to overcome temptation because in the end the payoff is so much better. Good Luck Just turn the waterhose on yourself when things get to warm LOL!
2006-10-12 16:57:10 · answer #7 · answered by LKJ 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I will try and help because you are genuine . I will start from afar but listen and listen carefully . follow my logic to its conclusion.
Scenario one
How safe are you to make love to him ?
From the look of it by yourself by virtue of you being a virgin you are 100% safe from HIV virus , The fact that your boyfriend appears experienced in that field you have to trust that in his errands he Only met those that were safe like you , but how do you know ?
Some say you can request a blood test and proceed from the results but that is cautious but neccesary answer to your safety.
What you need is an immediate sex education and counselling by professionals , Do not be shy seek for it . I know the Pain you are in , so near yet so far can make you mad.
2006-10-12 17:02:44 · answer #8 · answered by roy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are correct you put yourself in the right place and hormones take over then before you know it BAM! Read- Passion And Purity by Elizabeth Eliot if you haven't already. It may help you to understand that the greatest gift you can give your husband will not be replaced if you give it away before marriage. Once it's gone that void will never be filled.
2006-10-12 16:56:49 · answer #9 · answered by dsheppard65 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If it's important to remain a virgin, stay away of compromising siturations. You already know if you don't, it's going to happen. It doesn't sound to me like either one are you are really emotionally ready to handle it, so be around other people, and wait until the time is right for both of you. ~~~
2006-10-12 16:56:30 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋