I need some damage control. I met this girl and we went out for a little while. She eventually said she wanted to be friends and nothing more. I really really like this girl. I mean she is perfect in all the important ways. After we decided to be friends, we didn't see each other much (maybe once in two months). Recently, I got a job offer that is across the country in Arizona and I am thinking about taking it. The only thing holding me here is her. I took her to dinner the other night and I told her. We talked and she cried and the night was great. We hugged and kissed for hours. The following night, I saw her again and we hugged and kissed. After I left her house, I text messaged her and told her I loved her and that I can't imagine my life without her. I told her I need to get all this out before I go to Arizona. I spilled everything about how I feel. She didn't get the message till morning and said she'd text message me tonight. My question is, was it a mistake to tell her that?
2006-10-12 08:28:45 · 17 answers · asked by icemanind 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I once never told a guy that I was in love with him and he died and I never got to tell him. I assume he knew, but I don't know for sure...
So I don't think it was a mistake and even if you take the job and things don't work out, you always know that you tried and she knows how you felt and maybe just didn't feel the same way. I'm glad you were bold and strong enough to put your feelings out there because so many people choose not to just to save face. At least you did and you will always know that she does know how you feel.
2006-10-12 08:34:13 · answer #1 · answered by Truth Hurts 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
[N]o bro, not a mistake. Never have regrets. If it is meant to happen it will happen. If you left and didn't tell her, you would always look back and wished you did. Now this doesn't mean that this will turn out the way you want it. I am just saying, have no regrets, follow your passions, and live as though each day making the best decisions for yourself and maybe someday someone else if not her. Happy Trails dude, and good luck.
2006-10-12 15:35:34 · answer #2 · answered by [B] 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No it wasn't. You got it out of your system and you won't question later on in life what could of been. If she does return the feelings, all the better. But you did the right thing, it won't bother you later on and you won't see her again when you move to arizona, so it won't hurt the friendship too much. I say good Job, some people are too afraid to take that risk.
2006-10-12 15:32:59 · answer #3 · answered by lost and hurt 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No you did the right thing.....But you still need to take your job and leave...You sound like a good man,she had her chance now you need to think about yourself,you don't want to stay and if things don't work out beat yourself up by wondering what if.......She just wanted to be friends,was the answer the same when you told her the way you felt?
2006-10-12 15:38:19 · answer #4 · answered by cody 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is never bad to express yourself to another person, especially if that is how you truly feel. If you enjoy your work or are looking forward to taking the job out of state then you need to do it. It seems that she can't make up her mind from one minute to the next whether she wants to date or be friends. Keep in touch with her after you move, even invite her out to visit, but don't let her be your reason for not taking the job.
2006-10-12 15:32:29 · answer #5 · answered by mvngs 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think its good to be honest about your feelings. But don't give up a job offer for her. If its meant to be you'll be together. Ive had guys in my past feel for me the way you do for this girl but i just wasn't attracted to them to be romantic with them. So if she says she just wants a friendship with you don't take it as a heart break. And be her friend. It could later on become more.
2006-10-12 15:37:27 · answer #6 · answered by bugjuice 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh yeah. Big mistake!
I blame Hollywood for our perception of telling all at the end. You did too much too fast and it's kind of scary to her.
My advice is you need to inject some humor into your next response. About how your response was like something out of a bad chick flick. After all, it was a moment of weakness.
2006-10-12 15:36:40 · answer #7 · answered by bmusementpark 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I honestly don't think it is ever a mistake to tell someone how you truly feel. The reaction may not be what you want/wish for, but at least you know you did what you could. (As opposed to saying nothing and wondering "what if" for the rest of your life.)
2006-10-12 15:35:31 · answer #8 · answered by amybudz 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nope. She cried. She feels something, too. Just try not to make it like an ultimatum sorta thing (no "now or never"). If she does text you, call her back immediately and tell her you'd like to see her right then. These things need to be discussed face to face.
2006-10-12 15:33:30 · answer #9 · answered by randyken 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, especially after you felt better for getting it off your chest.
How she deals with it is HER issue. Not yours.
Take the job. Let the chips fall where they may. You have nothing to loose. It will be interesting to see what her response is.
2006-10-12 15:35:07 · answer #10 · answered by iyamacog 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋