You have 2 ppl legally free to marry, BUT doing so will really, really wreck essential benefits drawn separately. (Examples: elderly; physically or mentally handicapped---I've seen all cases.)
They are in love & committed to each other, & want to share the rest of their lives together--& yes, this includes a romantic (and erotic) component. Their families say "GO FOR IT!", & there's support for public "handfasting" or declaration ceremony to mark their bond. Their local "community" is perfectly willing to consider them as a "married couple".
Many Western religions frown on copulation outside of legal marriage as a sin. "Holy Scripture Plainly Saith...." (N.B.: Scripture, Lev. 19:19 also pretty Plainly Saith that linen-woolen mixes are forbidden, as is mixing 2 types of seed in fields.)
How to reconcile honest faith, wanting to "follow God's rules" (tough to interpret at times) with modern challenges & human needs? Go with the intent & let the Deity ultimately judge?
2006-10-12 08:17:03 · 29 answers · asked by samiracat 5 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
Interesting point.
Are atheists who are legally married also married in the eyes of God, because they signed that paper?
What about Buddhists?
Agnostics??
Does anyone know what courthouse Mary and Joseph went to to obtain their marriage license? Since Mary was legally underage, did her parents have to sign for her?
Of course, it's always better to be "legal", especially when it comes to protecting each other's "rights'...and I don't think we ought to encourage the idea of people living together outside of legal marriage, since it encourages people to be sexually irresponsible. If at all possible, people ought to abide by the law, and get the license...especially if the couple is planning to have children....but then, these elderly, handicapped, etc...well, it is doubtful whether these folks are planning families.
But, are the laws of the United States the same as the laws of God?
Tell ya what, here's a thought...since God knows our hearts, and the US government, much less our neighbors, or our "fellow Christians" do NOT know our hearts....maybe we ought to let Him be the Judge??
2006-10-12 08:51:37 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
As a christian, it is my obligation to be accepting to everybody, regardless of their sins. Judgement is God's job. So I tolerate it because it is my duty, but I will never see it as okay. As far as the situation goes. They should spend a lot of time in thought and prayer to see if this is what they really want. The bible says to even look upon a woman and think nasty thoughts is to commit adultery. So this would definately qualify as adultery. I think if they really do love each other, they should get married regardless of the benefits they will be loosing. The bilble says that the love of money is the root of all evil. If monetary benefits is what is keeping them from getting married, then they dont really love each other. Because if two people really love each other, then it doesn't/shouldn't matter if they have a whole lot of money.
2006-10-12 08:32:29 · answer #2 · answered by lil_caesar_08 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you going to put your trust into these things, these benefits? If all of your trust is there, then what will become of you should the system that provided these so-called benefits fail?
I don't know if both of you believe that God brought you together or not. If you do believe that He brought you together, and if He's big enough to bring the miracle to pass that you found each other, is He not also big enough to keep you together as a married couple? Is He big enough to take care of you no matter what the future of this earthly life may hold?
These are questions that only the two of you can settle in your own hearts.
EDIT: You can choose to honor God and receive honor from Him, or you can choose to honor man and the system of man and receive the honor that comes from man. Whichever one you choose, you'll find out how lasting or how fleeting the honor bestowed is from whomever you chose to honor.
2006-10-12 08:25:41 · answer #3 · answered by Carol L 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if they are committed why not get married? I think the point the previous poster made is possibly an exception... so if someone is truly committed but cant get married in that case they might be virtually married and I will set that case aside...
in general.. for people who can get married.. it is more clear
In the book of Hebrews it says "fornicators God will judge" which addresses this situation
on the one hand there is no official "marriage cerimony" in the Bible... so I would not want to be too strict...
on the other hand... sometimes a woman loses out and is used if a guy talks her into living with him... it is often more for his convenience than hers
addiitonally...it seems to me woman and children are more secure in a environment they can count on
and it seems best that sex happens in an atmosphere of lifelong ocmmittment
2006-10-12 08:22:50 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, I haven't found anywhere that says you have to go before a Priest/Preacher in order to be considered married in God's eyes. Nothing in there that states you have to sign anything to show you are married either. The only thing close to it is the "writ of divorce" and that is spoken against unless adultery is concerned.
Marriage, what we have today, is not a "Christian" or even a "Biblical" Institution. It is purely for Gov't, Tax, Benefit reasons and as you said, in some cases the benefits are greater without the piece of paper stating you are married.
2006-10-12 08:26:08 · answer #5 · answered by Kithy 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Let's face it, christianity and islam, which are the primary religions we're concerned about, are just plain against sexual freedom. No matter how you interpret their religious texts, it's going to be very hard to get rid of the instructions not to commit adultery and so on. So long as people continue to follow those religions, they will be intolerant towards sexual freedom.
Sex can indeed be reconciled with morality, and also with certain religions. It is possible to have sexual freedom without being immoral. Just not according to the Bible or the Koran. If we want sexual freedom, one of the many things we're going to have to do- possibly the primary one- will be to abandon the religions that prevent it (and hopefully all other religions too).
2006-10-12 08:22:18 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know several cases of handicapped couples who have been together for more than a decade and consider themselves a married couple, but have chosen not to become legally married because they would lose benefits if they made their union legal. They gave up one set of benefits, which our government grants to married couples, for another set that they would lose otherwise. The government, of course, professes to want to "protect the sacred institution of marriage," but it sometimes does exactly the opposite.
It is certainly possible to be wholeheartedly committed to one another without being legally married, and that seems fine, but I personally have a problem with someone getting around the rules to, essentially, defraud the government. That is, in my opinion, immoral.
2006-10-12 08:25:44 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know what you mean. My mom is on disability and if she marries she loses it! They would not be able to pay for all she needs on their income. (Meds, Dr Bills etc.) So she has to continue to live with him although she would like to make it official in God's eyes. I know one couple that had a ceremony but didn't go to the courts and file the papers. All they cared about was what was right in God's eyes. The US seems to punish people for doing the right thing. Reward those for doing the wrong. The more illegitimate children you have the more money you get....I won't get started. I am sure you know what I mean.
2006-10-12 08:22:49 · answer #8 · answered by Stiletto ♥ 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
"tough to interpret at times". means you have not studied the word.
Many misconceptions come from listening to what people think the bible say instead of reading it and learning. This is a problem with most religions. People are too lazy to read and understand. They would rather have someone tell them what it means.
I have had many conversations with people about the bible and what it says. Get a New American Standard bible and read John front to back. If you do not want to buy one go to a book store and read it. should not take more than 15 min.
2006-10-12 08:25:30 · answer #9 · answered by outdoorsfunyoung 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Honestly, I think it undermines marriage. Think about it, you're living with someone, having sex, acting like a married couple without being married. You also have no legal rights to your partner's insurance should anything happen. This is one reason why the gay community is fighting so hard to have gay marriages legal.
If you live with your lover, why marry him/her? What's a little piece of paper going to prove? This is how many view this subject.
As for me, I think living together is ok, but only if you're engaged and will be getting married or making it legal.
2006-10-12 08:27:27 · answer #10 · answered by sister steph 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋