how do I get rid of freeloaders in my house?

Question

my husband's family are all living with us and are freeloaders. I try to give them hints as to how to find a job so that they can be independent. but nothings work , the worst is that my husband (his highness is what I called him) doesn't see this as wrong because he feels bad that he is succesfull and his siblings aren't. help

Answer 1

Your husband has nothing to feel bad about. He is successful because he is a hard worker, and I'm guessing his siblings are not hard workers if they are mooching off of you. What he is now, he made of himself, and I think he should push them to do the same for them. How long are they going to depend on you for? You have your own husband and children to look after, they are not your responsility. Good luck.

Answer 2

Dear Kate, this is a tough one! There is probably no "nice" way of getting out of this. By hinting you wont get rid of such people, they are the kind who need a kick in the butt and probably more than one.
You might wanna try and talk to your husband again, tell him just how much this bothers you. Probably you have done this already, and he might have said, "well honey, dont take this so serious, it's not such a big deal, they wont stay forever", etc.
But if you are anything like me, than this is a big deal, a very big one in fact and you've got to do something about it.
I dont know your exact situation, so it's a bit difficult to give proper advice. And even if i knew it well, as i said, this is a tough place you're in. Any chance that YOU would move out (at least temorary)?
I wihs you best of luck, stand up for yourself girl!

Answer 3

Charge rent. Make them do chores, then complain that they can't do them right (even if they do it perfect). Be a *****. Make it hard for your husband to keep them there. Do the sexual blackmail thing. No more hints, tell the losers that they are losers. Start interfering in the freeloaders lives (if they have one). Blackmail. Convince your husband that he is in fact really holding them back, that if he wasn't so generous they would be out holding jobs and being independent, it's called tough love. Sell the house and insist on a much smaller house.

Answer 4

i don't have a freeloader in my home but a very close friend of mine has 1 in his, his freeloader has lived with him for years, doesn't do anything but take take take, he has a small child(the freeloader does) wont look for a job , has had various different fastfood jobs but always gets fired or quits, he may last at a job for a month and that's about it, he always has an excuse as to why he quit or got fired its always someone elses fault never his own, the freeloader has a free babysitter so he can go party , his babysitter is my friends live in girlfriend, he gets free room , and board cable tv, internet, food, doesn't lift a finger to help with anything, and though it isn't my problem , I care greatly for my friend that is being taken advantage of and I spend holidays with him and his girlfriend and the freeloader is there smoking dope being an ***, and constantly saying or doing inappropriate things, oh and of course yelling at his toddler, its gotten to the point I don't even like going over there anymore, even for the holidays, its absolutely drives me nuts, I know its really not my business but like I said I hate seeing my friend being taken advantage of

Answer 5

My husbands uncle stayed with us. (was to be a short peroid of time... then months and months went by) He quit his job... was unemployeed for almost 2 months..(we supported him) and I finally got tired of it when I mentioned something to him he said the wrong thing!
Without thinking I told him to get out. We got in a heated argument and I grabbed a clothes basket and started throwing his stuff in it... I walked right outside on the porch and threw it over the banister!!! Talk about feeling good! I have never done anything like that in my life!
There are no hard feelings between my husband and his uncle. I think he realized after the argument and the cleaning out the house.. he realized what he was and had done. My husband tried talking to him a couple of times. Letting him know we have a baby and cannot support a 36 year old on top of that. His uncle just wouldn't get the picture until that day.
It seems like a scary or weird thing to do but I tell you that I felt sooooo much better after I did that.
If you let them stay there to much longer it is going to drive you crazy and stress you out. It is also going to start affecting your marriage believe it or not.
My husband felt sorry for his uncle and wanted to help him as much as possible but... you know what? Enough is Enough! You have to draw the line!
Good luck to you!

Answer 6

You get rid of freeloaders by telling your husband to either grow up and get a spine or that you're going to leave him.

Mean it and start packing - because he's going to let you go, rather than buckle to his family.

Answer 7

Don't just hint, tell them to get off their lazy butts and contribute to the household expenses. You and your husband cannot continue to support them, you could end up in trouble financially and the freeloaders won't help.

Answer 8

Your dad probably feels like it's his fault your brother is so irresponsible. Considering you said half brother. You sound sensible and well adjusted. I'm sure your dad has a plan. So until your Dad has had enough, there is nothing u can do about it. Except don't let him come to your house when Dad finally gets enough.

Answer 9

Without your husbands support it will be difficult.

But do nothing.

Don't shop or cook. Have basically no food in the house. If you have kids, make sure to get them milk on the way to school and such. Go out to eat (without them!)
Disconnect cable if you have it.
Don't clean up areas they use.

You get the picture.

Answer 10

i know the feeling believe me. first is YOU are going to have to give them an ultimatum. get a job or get out. give a timeline like a month. if they find a job tell them afte a few paychecks that they are going to have to help with some bills. or get out. if they help extra cash if not no more freeloaders. but you need to hold your ground.