say you have a kid, you and your mate both have full time jobs, and can't afford a daycare, what do you do?

Question

i want to give my friends some advice but don't know what to tell them. they are really stressed out about this right now. having to take off work and the mom is thinking about quitting her job which cant be good. close relatives are not available to keep the baby either.

thanks for all the answers, i will let this one go up for a vote

Answer 1

Well they could try to find an experienced baby sitter for the time being. That would be cheaper than a daycare! If they can't afford that then they need new jobs, or need to monitor their spending and minimize their expenses

Answer 2

I have the slight same problem, only difference is that I actually did quit my job and have been staying home with my kids for the past 2 years. (worked a couple of part-time jobs, but they didn't work out). Child care is a huge problem in this country. Yes they could try to get assistance from human services, but chances are they make too much money to receive it (kind of a catch 22 isn't it?). See, the way it works is, you and your spouse have to make under a certain amount in order to recieve assistance, but if they are both working than odds are they will excede that amount. So at that point with how much childcare costs, it comes down to whether its worth both parents working, because one of the paychecks is going to be paying just for childcare! The only advice I can give, and have been able to figure would work for myself, is to work separate shifts (which will suck for a while). Also, since there will probobly be a couple hours of lapover where both parents will be at work, maybe they could look into finding a teenager in the area who could babysit those couple of hours. I have found in exerience that most teenagers who are willing to babysit do a great job because they are trying to impress the parents and make a little spending money. Good luck to your friends, I know how they feel.

Answer 3

Whichever parent makes the larger income needs to continue working. The other parent needs to stay home and take care of the baby. When that happens, you have to learn to live with less. It isn't easy. Often one person or both can end up losing their jobs because they aren't there often enough. So if they totally can't afford any daycare at all then the only other option is one stays home. The one that stays home can look into a company called, Alpine Access. They pay you to work from home. It's one of the few reputable companies out there. Good luck helping them.

Answer 4

this is a tough situation that many parents face. however, if one parent working days and the other nights is not an option, try looking for free daycare. they have it, but waiting lists are usually long. for a baby, however, daycare isn't good. they can't talk, you don't know how they are being treated, and they really should spend there early developmental time bonding with parents, not care givers. daycare is best for kids 2+. i understand if for financial reasons they both need to work, but maybe they should have considered these things before having a child? my husband worked two jobs so I could stay home with our baby, because I didn't plan on all the costs either. there are ways, they just need to look. but really one parent should try to be with the baby at all times, not shove it off on someone else.

Answer 5

I have a very biased opinion on this matter. I think the biggest problem today is that we do not raise our own kids. That is not how it used to be. Daycare is not a mother. Grandma is not the parent. If you have kids, a parent should be at home with them until they go to school. It is that important, to family life, to learn love, to get the true nurturing (not the kind that is paid for which is YES subpar), and to best raise the child. That being said, EVERY family can do this. If it means selling your house and moving into a small appartment, do it. If it means spending less money, that's how it goes. One parent should stay home, and it should preferably be the mother - women are BY NATURE more nurturing and better equipped for that job. Tell your friend to quit her job and focus on her child. Daycare and Grandma are not appropriate substitutions for parents.

Answer 6

If they can't afford daycare then I do suggest that one work during the day and one work during the night. It will be rough but that's the only way I see things working unless they can hire themselves a nanny for cheaper than daycare. Their local social service should be able to help; especially if they can't afford it, to get funding for childcare. I would leave quitting as a last resort. If that must happen then find a hobby to do from home that will allow her to make money too; perhaps a daycare service. This way she help other parents in the same situation while her child gets to be around other children as well. It's food for thought.

Answer 7

how can they not afford daycare if they both work full time?
is mom quitting her job cuz that's where her heart is, or is she doing it only cuz there are no childcare options? will this eventually make her resentful? does she LOVE her job and want to work?
have they figured how much money they would save if she didnt have to commute, dress, lunch, etc for work?
if they are really low income, why dont they seek assistance from the state? the state will even pay childcare expenses for families that really are that poor.
maybe quitting her job and being a SAHM for the next couple yrs, or even until school would be a GOOD thing for the family?
its funny how life throws us curveballs that we dont plan for, and how it can knock us off balance at first, but we always manage to move things around to make it work.
this might be a blessing...?

Answer 8

Well- the cost of daycare sucks and it really made more sense for me to stay at home. You would be better off getting a part time job and work when the husband is home. Because basically after paying for daycare you'd be making somewhere near part time wages for full time work.

Answer 9

Well, they should've thought about that BEFORE bringing a child into the world, but that's done. The only other thing I suggest is either getting jobs on opposite shifts or one of htem quitting & staying home. Whichever one quits could babysit at home to earn extra money or sell avon or something similar. Other than that I don't know. Hiring a nanny or babysitter wouldn't be much cheaper for them but it could be an option.

Answer 10

Give the child up for adoption.
Work different shifts.
Open a home daycare.
Work from home.
Find work that can be done with the child (childcare worker at the Y for example).

Mom quiting her job isn't necessarily bad. They will also need to cut back on their spending but it can be done. Many parents find a way to make it work without going on government assistance.