weve been married 4 eight yrs. he knew i loved cats when we got together now after eight yrs he says thats it no more cats! there not bothering him he just plain out hates themhe keeps being realy mean about it like saying hes going to leave if i dont get rid of my babies.he told me if i dont he will get rid of them !this is childish what can i do? ive loved animals all my life ? PLEASE HELP!!!
2006-10-12 02:58:25 · 16 answers · asked by starr_dancer2004 1 in Pets ➔ Cats
Perhaps there is another problem and hating cats is just a symptom. I think you are going to have to think about this for awhile. Maybe your husband is craving something he cannot name.
2006-10-12 03:02:39 · answer #1 · answered by moonsister_98 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He may have room to fuss if you are not keeping the litterboxes clean or letting the cats trash the house or his belongings. But he knew you came as a package deal w the cats when you met. It's not fair to come down w an ultimatum now.
You need a marriage counselor to make sure the cats are not the real issue. It might be, or it's a sign of something more going on. First the cats, then what isn't 'meeting his approval'?
Been down that road before..... suddenly one thing I did had to be changed,,, then it was another thing,,, and another- bottom line was he just didn't want to be married anymore and wouldn't come out and say it. Kept trying to change everything up to make me leave first and be able to claim it was all my fault!
Make sure your cats are not the real issue and see a counsellor fast. Go by yourself if he claims it's not his problem and you are the crazy one!
2006-10-12 03:10:45 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Make a deal with him - make a couple of rooms in the house "off limits" to the cats so he can get away from them if he wants to. I love cats, but if you have more than 2, and they like to jump on the bed while your sleeping or meow at night or like to kick all the litter out of the box & onto the floor, it can become very frustrating for someone who is essentially putting up with your pets. Take his complaints seriously and take some action to curb the problem. You'll probably see he's not unreasonable once he feels his life is not being controlled by the animals in his living space.
2006-10-12 03:15:17 · answer #3 · answered by rrmorris45 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well thats a tough situation to be in .
Some people will hate cats without a particular reason.
Having a cat in the house has its drawbacks...fur..claw marks, constant attention. Hes probably not so happy about one or two things about this cat. Or maybe hes just a cat hater.
Talk to him about it. Be kind. Be gentle. Be a little more gentle than you are to your cats. Cause all in all honey, a human being is worth a lot more than a bunch of animals. And if you value your marriage, you should find some common ground in this.
Good luck
2006-10-12 03:10:48 · answer #4 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Men who dislike cats are one or all of the following: women haters, insecure in their own masculinity, weak minded and believe what someone told them that men hate cats (this is the same as a man not seeing a movie because it's a "chick flick" which is stupid), are afraid of cats thinking they have some kind of magic power (a buried memory of witches always having cats), or perceive the cat as a baby substitute or forerunner of the woman wanting a baby.
There's not much you can do about it. If he is going to be abusive to the cats behind you back, then you are better off not having any. It would be selfish on your part to expose a small animal to a neanderthal.
2006-10-12 03:10:01 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I once had an ex-boyfriend that told me the day would come when I would have to choose - him or my cat. Notice how I said he is an EX-boyfriend? Add to it the fact that he knew you love cats and have cats - he is just being a selfish jerk. If you give in to him on this, you will always regret it. I would tell him to get out. Find a good man who loves animals as much as you do.
2006-10-12 05:00:29 · answer #6 · answered by innocence faded 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well he sounds like a self centered jerk to me.If he is this bad over your cats (which he knew you loved before you two got married) I would have to say that I would leave him..I know that sounds drastic but what else is he going to hate about you?If a man came into my life and knew that I had and loved my cat and then after we were married he threatened me and them I would show him the door.He obviously has some issues that he should take care of.
2006-10-12 03:10:05 · answer #7 · answered by jess 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, it may be a symptom of something else. Or, are the litter
box(s) clean? Is there a smell? Are you paying more attenton to them? Is he THAT insecure? He knew about the 8 years ago & was okay, but now no more? Is he seeing someone else & using the cats as an excuse because he knows how much you like them?
2006-10-12 03:06:52 · answer #8 · answered by fairly smart 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like a very selfish man, get rid of him not the cats. I don't trust people who do'nt like cats, I think they are very insecure or maybe a rat in a former life.
2006-10-12 03:32:16 · answer #9 · answered by dsrspring 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You shouldnt have to get rid of your babies just for him to be happy. Tell him that your cats are your babies, and that he knew about your love for animals 8 years ago, and that if they bother him now then he should just leave.
2006-10-12 03:12:25 · answer #10 · answered by Katherine S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋