Help with mentally ill neighbour.?

Question

We have a mentaly ill neighbour who lives on her own but is causing some very serious problems for our family which consists of 2 daughters under 7 & an unborn baby due in less than a week, we have been made ill and our daughters get stuff squirted on them while they are playing in our backyard and she takes it upon herself to enter our house without us knowing at the time and takes stuff and puts it back at a later time, we have had lighters missing, scissors, keys to the house, tv remote & other things go missing aswell as our food then it gets put back & we are unable to eat it as it makes us ill so we have no choice but to throw it out. We have seen her run out of our yard & into her yard, us not knowing what she has been doing in our yard. We have a hot water system under our house & exposed floor boards & she has been spraying stuff in the top af the hot water system at the vent. The scissors went missing today and this is only part of what happens.Serious replies only please.

Answer 1

Call her family if you can, if not, then unfortunately you may have to contact the police or social services and get them to contact her family. Do it immediately as you never know, maybe this person has some "bad" things she wants to do to your children with your scissors. Better to be safe than to bury a child.

Answer 2

I would call the police. Just because this person is mentally ill does not give her the right to cause your family problems. I don't know what she is spraying in the top of the hot water system but if it is something damaging then she can get in trouble for that. Going into your house without your permission is also an offense.

I won't say all mentally ill people are dangerous but some can be. It sounds like she may be ok expect for being a nucence and invading your privacay. I will say it is better to be safe than sorry.

I would keep calling the police untill something is done about it. Sooner or later if she doesn't go to jail she will be sent to a home where people can take care of her and make sure she knows how to behave.

Mentally ill or not if someone behaves in a certain manner and is always getting away with it their behavior will continue and may get worse.

Good luck

Answer 3

Well, first of all you apparently need better security; if you're not locking the house, lock it. definitely change the locks, since she may have made copies when she stole the keys previously. Sorry to say, the days of leaving ones house unlocked safely are over. If you are going to get the police involved, they're not gonna do much on your say so alone. They'll need evidence. They might have a word with her though. Her mischief sounds pretty juvenile in nature, and maybe scaring her is enough, but this sounds like a nut-case with a lot of time on her hands, so it could just make her craftier. Perhaps if you have a background check run on her, and she has been involved with similar activities before, that will help. Usually for a restraining order, they need more evidence. Plus, crazy people won't pay much heed to it. Try to get other neighbors to be aware of this, and to observe her behavior, so they can in some way corroborate your claims. The most effective thing to do might be to make as many people aware of the problem as possible. Finally, is there any reason that she may be personally angry with you? Are the children making excessive noise, possibly at innapropriate hours? I'm not saying you do this, but there is a tendency these days of people not preventing their children from annoying others. Is it possible that the children are guilty of any mischief against her? Be honest with yourself on all possible circumstances, as children these days are by and large not trained to be considerate of others. Are you doing your job there? If they have carte blanc on noisy outside activity, then that could be a problem. Are you the only neighbor that she's victimizing?

Answer 4

She is probably doing these things because she is mentally ill and doesn't know better. I don't mean that you should ignore it, but please don't call the police until all other options have been exhausted.

First, change the locks on your doors and keep the keys on you. Keep your doors locked at all times. It is tough with young kids, but with this neighbor you really can't let your kids out of your sight anyway.

If you know anyone in her family, that would be a good place to start. Also, watch to see if anyone who might be a social worker stops by to visit. If you see such a person, go over and introduce yourself and ask if she or he can help with this problem. If she is renting, find out who the land lord is and complain to him or her.

If none of those things are possible or don't help the situation, call the police. If you are still feeling gracious enough at this point, suggest that they bring her to the hospital. This woman needs help, not a jail. What she really needs is more supervision. They have community residences for people with her behaviors. They used to be called halfway houses.

If at any time you feel your family is in immediate danger, call the police. I am not, by any means, suggesting that you allow your family to be in danger for even a second in the process of getting this woman the help she needs.

Answer 5

Honestly, with the type of behaviors you describe, I'm not so sure she should be living on her own. She is being disruptive to your family and I'm surprised you let her come into your house. I'm sure you feel she is harmless or you wouldn't let her in, but I think it has come to the point where she has become a nuisance to your family. There are group homes where the mentally ill can live and maybe she would be better off in one of them, where if she is not alone, she may not have these odd behaviors of being so disruptive to her neighbors. It's a type of interaction for her since she probably has few friends. I would possibly get ahold of the police, who in turn could contact a human service organization who should be following her in the first place. It sounds like she needs some home visits everyday and actually someone should be following her to help prevent this behavior. Believe it or not, the mentally ill are not stupid. Since you won't tell her to stop, someone else will, but you need to make the public aware. It sounds like you have been quite tolerant of her so far because you realize she is not a bad person, she's just mentally ill.

Answer 6

Call your local police department and make a report. This is not the first time that they have dealt with mentally ill people. They should know the right channels to go through to get this person some help. I would also invest in deadbolt locks and keep the house locked until something is done. This person seems capable of causing some serious harm to your family. Don't go another day living in fear...contact the police department.

Answer 7

First, keep your door locked. Second, don't let your daughters outside without you out there watching them. When she does something like this, tell her she can not 'spray the kids' 'come into your yard' whatever "it" may be at the time. Let her know that if she continues to do this, the police will be called.

Aside from this, is there a relative that visits? If so, they need to be informed of the improper actions. If not, is there a facility or institution or something that helps to monitor her? Someone must be able to keep tabs on her, as she is incapable of working and somehow she must have her bills paid and someone to visit to be sure her home is in order.

Good luck, this must be hard to deal with. it may not be a bad idea to call your local police department and ask for advice.

Answer 8

This lady could be a danger to herself as well as your family. Has there ever been any family around of hers? Is there no one you can talk to about this situation in her family? You should try and get in touch with someone in authority if you can not reach a family member. I think it is a good thing that you are taking into consideration her mental state and are not contacting the police at this time. Obviously she needs help that jail can't give her. But if she continues to violate your privacy you may have no choice. You are correct in that you don't know what she has been doing in your house and on your property.See if you can't contact someone in her family.Make an attempt to talk to her. You may be surprised. She may just be looking for some attention.

Answer 9

Hi-

I am so sorry that you are having issues such as this and with small kids it is not to be taken lightly.. I would go to your local police department and file a report just to have something on file..... They will of course will want proof of the things you are saying- you can then apply for a Non Tresspassing Warrant against her- however the judge will want proof before signing off on it.. I would introduce it as "Probable Cause" meaning you do not have video proof, but you do have witnesses, signed statements, and a police report.....If all else fails- contact who ever the Guardians are that visit or stay with your neighbor and explain what all is going on and let them know you have filed a report..etc etc...I would also contact an organization in your jurisdiction that assists with Mentally Challenged persons and ask them for advice.. You want to be careful and document *everything* because you can be liable for infringing upon their rights- which can lead to a lawsuit- because they are Disabled... Good luck Dear!

Answer 10

i know you think calling the police will only make it worse, it will not. you must document what is happening to protect yourself, the best ways is to call the police to get reports done. if it is so severe as to include b&e then i would get a inexpensive video monitor system , seen them at clubs warehouses for 200 bucks and some under. record on tape what is happening and her entry/exits. show them to the officers . what she is doing is against the law and is endangering your children. what will jhappen if your 7 yr old confronts her by surprise in your home? if you can afford it place camera facing the yard where they have been assaulted to further show in court if needed the extent of her behavior. you could get lucky and a visit from cops will scare her into stopping. a arrest will surely get the point accross.