my step-father has been being a real a**hole since he quit rubbin smokless tabbaco and it is really making me mad.....eveyday he comes home yelling about something....so i just kkep yelling back.....in a couple months i will be 18....should i tell him off for good and leave or stay and take his crap
2006-10-12 01:27:11 · 15 answers · asked by my name is jimmy 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Good Morning Damien,
Thers some good advice listed here for you and I`m merely confirming from a father and step fathers experience that you are sharp fella who obviously cares for your step dad in your own way. You are old enough to realise the nicotine with drawal symtoms and their ugly effects. Perhaps suggest to your step dad the tension his yelling causes and reassure him you are trying to understand the issues he is going through. Even suggest the patch to help him step down in encrements to help everyone involved. Get him one of those little sqishy sqeezable balls they call tension relievers and jokingly give it to him when he comes home all grumpy, just walk up in his face , smiling, (he`ll wonder what you`re up to) and say here dad, I thought of you today, squeeze the mess outta this, your doing good on the kicking the habit, I`m proud of ya! And walk away! We parents are certainly not perfect and can be down right mean at times.
Hugs
Jim
2006-10-12 01:45:51 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
What does 'quit rubbin smokless tabbaco' mean?
Does it mean that he's stopped using a nicotine product?
If he has, then he's suffering from with drawls and you should be a little more supportive of him. He's gonna be cranky until he gets through the with drawls of it and it's just as bad on him as it is on you.
He knows it's 'him' causing the upsets and he doesn't like it any more than you do, but when we quit the nicotine habit, we turn into monsters that don't know what we're saying.
You'll be 18 soon, so do as you like, but I'd advise you bite your tongue and try to feel a little sympathy for what he's going through.
2006-10-12 08:35:42 · answer #2 · answered by Lucianna 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What have you acomplish by yelling back? He should not be a grouch but you have to deal with this in a more mature matter since you will be 18yrs old soon.Try to say nice things to him.Let him know you are proud of him for quitiing rubbin tobbaco.You will be 18 years old soon and you need to move out anyways.You should have a job and be ready to move out anyways.
2006-10-12 09:14:01 · answer #3 · answered by darlene100568 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
what your step dad is going threw is withdraws..i can understand how that is effecting you and probably the whole family..he probally should seek someone to help him to threw that..but if he is anything like my step dad..he is probally stubbord and will not get any help..but you can help! have you tried taking to him about this, instead of yelling? the problem is that when others seem to attack us, we react in an attacking way also..someone has to stop the attacking..so be the man you are, quit yelling, ask him to talk with you..and if he won't just be patient, forgive him and if all possible try to avoid him for a few days..blessings
2006-10-12 08:43:08 · answer #4 · answered by connie l 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The tobacco withdrawal will pass - just be patient. He'll either get over it, or go back to chewing.
As for leaving - you got a job yet? Can you afford to live by yourself? Go put together a basic budget for rent, food, car payment, gas, utilities, and so on before you decide.
And if you're considering college, will you be living in a dorm somewhere soon? If so, just be patient - this too will pass.
2006-10-12 08:32:12 · answer #5 · answered by Ralfcoder 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Knowing part of the reason he's being a grouch, I'd just try to get along, but not be around much when he is - avoid doing the things you know are triggers. He's experiencing the psychological withdrawal and it will soon pass. Telling him off isn't going to help the family situation. Be the stronger one and try to be nice :) God bless you. ~Nise~
2006-10-12 08:47:03 · answer #6 · answered by newfsdrool 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The problem is you're making things worse by yelling back. I know it is hard but try your best to ignore it. Things will get better. I'm not taking up for him but quitting tobacco products is hard. Once he gets over the addiction things should go back to normal. Just try to bear with it.
2006-10-12 08:30:33 · answer #7 · answered by dolphin2253 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i can't say i exactly nkow how you feel.. but he sounds like my dad on a reg. basis even without the tobacco stuff...
the biggest impact i think that you could possibly make is to NOT tell him off when you're 18, but leave unannounced... Don't tell him until the day of. Don't make a big deal of it. Just leave. If he asks why, say it shouldn't matter if i meant that much to you, you woulda took advantage of our relationship... BUT DONT TELL HIM OFF, BC then you woulda done him a FAVOR by leaving..
good luck sweetie...
2006-10-12 08:32:21 · answer #8 · answered by holly w 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
wheres your mother when this is happening? Your almost 18 when he comes home yelling, go to your room and ignore him and keep telling yourself, "ill be 18 pretty soon and i want have to listen to him anymore" Its so much easier to walk away, or "tune" a person out, Ignore him baby.
2006-10-12 08:31:32 · answer #9 · answered by Lace 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My advice... don't burn your bridges with him. If you want to leave, do it on good terms... claim your indepedance but spin it as being your sense of adventure.
While it pisses you off... by yelling back you are escalating the situation. Just try to hang back and focus on doing other things.
Good luck.
2006-10-12 08:31:39 · answer #10 · answered by Sam I AM 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋