I explained my POV, but not very forcefully. Should I risk alienating her by being more outspoken? I want to be there for her afterwards when she's suffering over it.
2006-10-11 09:11:35 · 33 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
I don't want her to suffer, but I've seen this before. It's very likely she'll be pretty torn up about it.
2006-10-11 09:43:37 · update #1
Mind your own business.
P.S. Does your friend eat meat? Show her pictures of a slaughterhouse, cows being electrocuted and bludgeoned, screaming in pain with their throats cut. Reality can be a b*tch.
2006-10-11 09:27:45 · answer #1 · answered by Sweetchild Danielle 7 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Support your friend anyway that she specifies, you can support her, while still hanging on to your beliefs.
It will always be her choice ultimately and you as her friend have to assume that she has made this choice with every option available to her, meaning she hasn't made this choice lightly.
let her be able to trust her feelings with you after ward, during and even before. She is going to go through a myraid of emotions and if she needs space, give that to her as well. One thing, just because you take an opposite view do not assume of what she is feeling or will feel.
perhaps look on the internet for local or annonymous sites that would help her heal emotionally such as groups that openly discuss abortion through thier own experiences.
Don't treat her with kid gloves, just be her friend like usual, but don't pretend things didn't happen, only talk about it when she opens the discussion that way, and don't presume to know what she is thinking.
you are a good friend already and I am sure she appreciates your love and support.
God Bless, you both,
Shannon
2006-10-11 09:19:48 · answer #2 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you did the right thing explaining your POV. The only thing you can do is to be a friend for her through this. People have free will to make their own choices. I don't think you are being judmental either by telling her your POV. If you are truly friends then you should be able to discuss things with each other. Friends don't always agree on everything but the most important thing about being a friend is being a friend when that friend needs you the most. I hope this helps.
2006-10-11 09:20:21 · answer #3 · answered by Lorrie W 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would (with love) tell her to imagine how she will feel after killing a baby? I mean, people are saying she won't suffer? Whatever! We are killing our future! The issues she will have to face if she does do it far outweigh if she would just have it and find a family.
The question to ask her is
is she just being selfish?
fine if she doesn't want it-there are plenty of families that do
tell her to visit a church, a crisis preg center, anything
You know my church had white crosses in the yard for every baby that was killed in our state from abortions in the past five years. You could hardly see any grass. It was breathtaking.
Just let her know you will be there for her the whole way!
If she is truly a friend to you, you will do whatever it takes to explain your strong POV. Just think if you don't be forceful about your opinion that you will have to live with yourself for not arguing the issue.
Best of luck and God Bless my friend!
2006-10-11 09:23:53 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Man its not up to you and its not your choice to make. Its her life, and her baby and you as a good friend should just be there to support her and be there to listen. I mean shes already your friend, she probably knows how strongly u feel, and probably was fearful of telling you ( and if she didnt tell you herself thats probably why). She doesnt need people telling her what to do or what she is doing wrong, you may not understand the circumstances of the situation. Also the trauma of having to have an abortion in the first place is bad enough, you dont need to add to it, and make it even more painful emotionally for her. Please stop thinking about yourself here, and see the bigger picture, and that has nothing to do with what you believe in. You can decide when it comes to your own children.
2006-10-11 09:23:51 · answer #5 · answered by Jennifer Lopez 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She is doing what she thinks is right. You are trying to convince your friend that she is making a bad decision, but in the end, it is her decision, is it not? You could kidnap her, tie her up and force feed her until she delivers her baby, but that's quite extreme (it also takes her decision away from her).
The question boils down to how far do you want to go in pushing your belief on someone else, and what are you willing to personally risk in doing so? Will you risk the friendship? Would you risk jail time? Would you risk your life? Would you take another's life? All of these things have been done many times in the past by many individuals seeking to push their beliefs on others. All of them thought they were doing the right thing.
In the end, you too must do you what you think is right.
2006-10-11 09:22:09 · answer #6 · answered by 006 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Pray for her and be with her when she's going to get the abortion. You don't want to be forceful about her being wrong so much as explaining to her that regardless of what scientists and others may say, that baby she is carrying is human, and has the right to live as much as anyone else. Let her know that you're against her decision, but try and help her as much as possible through the process. The rest is up to her.
2006-10-11 09:17:59 · answer #7 · answered by Crono 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You should state your position strongly but lovingly not only for the sake of your friend but also for the sake of teh developing child.
It makes no sense to think that having an abortion will solve a problem. First the woman has a child. Then after th abortion she has a dead child. She will never forget that.
Abortion is not a "choice." Women and girls who decide to have an abortion do it because they think they have NO choice.
2006-10-11 09:18:42 · answer #8 · answered by jakejr6 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm anti-abortion. I have my own "feminist" reasons for being against this very anti-female procedure. Still if my friend wanted to have one I would keep my mouth shut, and offer her my sincere support. I can't make that decision for anyone but me. I can't make any decision for anyone but me. All I can do is love my friend, hope for the best for her, and offer the only thing I have- my love and support.
2006-10-11 09:19:26 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Pro-life is a view, not a demand. No one can MAKE anyone make any decision. All you can do is try to influence one's decision. It is still HER choice...just like it's your choice to do whatever thing you do that you should not...and same with me...and the rest of the world.
Nevertheless, I would hope that anyone who would influence a person to make a decision to keep their baby would also explain WHY, encourage them if they choose that decision AND help any way they can...not necessarily monetarily, not necessarily on-hands (though, if you can, you should)...but most importantly, ministerially. Continuing to help them with their spiritual walk with Christ will give them all the necessary tools to BECOME the mother God called them to be.
The best way to help anyone is to help their heart. Teaching them to fish for food instead of bringing them a fish to eat to go hungry another day. *smile*
So, if she still chooses to abort, love her where she is, accept her decision and be there for her as much as you would be if she chose to keep her baby. We are continually forgiven, so let's be continually forgiving!
Be encouraged!
2006-10-11 09:47:40 · answer #10 · answered by ConcernedMom 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's her choice. I am pro-choice & my daughter is 27. Choice means having a choice. Are you going to be there to help her raise the child, emotionally & financially? If not, just shut up & be supportive after the fact. She will suffer. If you have a conscience, its not an easy decision to live with.
2006-10-11 09:19:36 · answer #11 · answered by shermynewstart 7 · 1⤊ 2⤋