My sister (51, divorced, 3 boys, 16, 17, 18) met up with an old boyfriend she had when she was 18yo. They decided to drive a tractor trailer truck together, 10 days away, 4 days home. He is telling her he will pay off her mortgage, buy her a ranch w/ horses, cars, give her all his money, for a place to stay on thier 4 days home. I don't know if all this will take place or not. He has already started the driving, she is starting in Jan. Is he taking her for a ride? and most importantly, the 3 boys with be home alone when she is gone for the 10 days on. Should I be worried about them, or do you think they are old enough?
2006-10-11 09:10:17 · 14 answers · asked by zoe 3 in Health ➔ Mental Health
If you're close enough to check on them in person the first time she's gone, I would do so. If not, call them. Ask if they need to know anything, etc. Your sister should probably leave them food instead of money for food to ensure they don't blow all the money on takeout then starve for five days. If they don't already know how to do their own laundry, etc., they need to start now. Other than that, they should be fine. And they'll be better off for having had the experience when they go to college.
2006-10-11 09:20:56 · answer #1 · answered by Amanda 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Boys old enough to be taught to act responsibly.
Guy has a decent idea, but if he's in earnest theyshould spell it in writing, in a contract with built in provisions for the case it doesn't work out.
Your sister should make it plain that there is a fear factor, he should not recoil from making a formal committment.
I would not refuse a fair contract underlying the business side of my most important relationship.
2006-10-11 09:17:09 · answer #2 · answered by Nomore Replies 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It depends on the nature of the boys. If they are very responsible and there is no doubt that they will stay out of harm, then it may be okay.
Personally, I'd never want to take that risk.
From a social services point of view, she can not be reported because the oldest boy is an adult. At least, that is my understanding.
2006-10-11 09:19:53 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
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2016-12-16 06:07:01 · answer #4 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hell yes you should be worried--if not alarmed. What he's "offering" your sister is unrealistic compensation for 4 days of lodging--even with "perks".
Most truckers are good guys, and a few a NOT. The "nots" can be as psycho (drug induced or not) as anybody else--maybe more so.
Just 'cuz she knew him well 30+ YEARS ago, doesn't mean she knows him at ALL now.
Warn her-- many truckers use speed, amphetamine, whites, meth, chrystal,...just to do their job & don't look like the typical "speed freaks" you'd expect .
2006-10-11 09:20:11 · answer #5 · answered by Clycs 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think that's a bad idea
it sounds like she's not giving a damn what could go wrong
he could be taking her for a ride yes
and those sons are too young to be alone for that long of a time
the 18 year old isnt, but that's b/c he's considered an adult now
the other two can be taken away if their parent or rightful guardian is gone for too long
2006-10-11 09:16:15 · answer #6 · answered by kaeh 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes. I think he is taking her for a ride and that your instincts are correct. Some people think that teenagers don't need their parents around as much as smaller children, but I believe they do. Especially if they don't really know or like this new man in their monther's life. I think you definintely should be worried about them.
Its perfectly fine to bring up your concerns to your sister, but you can't control what someone else does.
2006-10-11 09:22:42 · answer #7 · answered by R_H_P 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes they are old enough and they are probably very excited. let them alone! if they mess up this time their MOTHER will know that they are not responsible enough to be left alone again. my mother left me alone for a 4 days when i was 14 and learned i was responsible. but 18,17,16 is DEFINETLY old enough. if their MOTHER is trusting them it im sure she knows what she is doing.
sounds like the guy is pulling her string tell her not to get her hopes up.
2006-10-11 09:29:50 · answer #8 · answered by The Weed Fairy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
she is a fool if she leaves 3 boys that age home alone for that long a period of time. boys that age are very rarely responsible.
i think it sounds a bit dodgy.
2006-10-11 09:14:01 · answer #9 · answered by trinity729 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
She needs affection and security and he is giving it to her... no it doesn't sound very healthy from your standpoint but she is fine and the kids will be fine. Just Randomly call and check up, they'll be ok.. and SO WILL YOU! lol Don't worry
2006-10-11 09:20:36 · answer #10 · answered by Amanda F 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋