Just let me start by saying this I love the man I'm with.He is not a drinker and i'am .In the past he doesnt like the way I'am with alcohol therefore he dont want me drinking.At times I feel like i'm grown I should be able to have a drink every now and then.Now he knew I drunk alcohol when he did get with me.Just confused!!Get this he said I can drink other places(mothers house) just not in our house.We live together.....
2006-10-11 07:52:13 · 19 answers · asked by only me 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
It sounds like he's has your best interests at heart, actually. But that doesn't mean he can control you. Let him know that you are a grown *** woman and can do whatever you want. If he can't handle that, it's his problem.
2006-10-11 07:55:49 · answer #1 · answered by Deleted 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't like the idea of someone trying to change someone else but I can see why he might be concerned. It's very easy for someone to abuse alcohol and not realize it. It's obvious that he really cares about you. However, he shouldn't be telling you that you can't drink anything at all. The best thing I could suggest is that you sit down and talk to him about it. Find out what his concerns are and consider what he has to say. You can either try to work out some sort of compromise or try to reassure him that you'll be careful. Ultimately, the decision is yours.
2006-10-11 14:58:49 · answer #2 · answered by Secrets are best for one... 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, true love is about accepting everything about a person. If he wants to change you, that just means he has this image of what his life or a relationship he is in should be like.
He is probably more worried about your safety. Men prey on drunk women, and women tend to naturally flirt when they have had a few, even if they have no intentions of persuing it. There are a lot of things that are associated with going out and drinking.
2006-10-11 14:58:00 · answer #3 · answered by tightlies 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he dislikes the way you are when you're drunk, he should leave. On the other hand, if it upsets him so much, why do you do it? Is drinking that important to you or are you just hell-bent on not letting anyone "control" you?
I think he needs to reassess the situation and what he wants for his future- possibly a drinker like you isn't going to be his match. And if booze and your right to drink it is more important to you than his wishes, leave him.
2006-10-11 14:57:59 · answer #4 · answered by Violet Pearl 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds like you do not know how destructive alochol is. go to an AA meeting sounds like it would do you good. drinking is not doing anything positive for you. if you have a problem giving it up you have a problem. Lucky you that this guy is sticking around to try to help you. if you are just drinking on occasion that is one thing but defending it the way you are sounds like you are at the beginning stages of alcholism. get some help get an 800 number from 411
2006-10-11 15:03:19 · answer #5 · answered by Mars 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should try to compromise with each other, that's one of the first things about being in a relationship. Do you get 'wild' or belligerent when you drink? He might not like the person you turn into after several drinks. If you love him, you should try to meet him half way and if he loves you he should do the same.
Good luck!
2006-10-11 14:57:18 · answer #6 · answered by misscruz 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes compatibility is as important as love is when it comes to successful relationships. You both have to decide how important this issue is, and if it is something you can compromise about and deal with. Is he a recovering alcoholic, or just abstains because he doesn't like the effects of alcohol, or moral reasons? Those reasons make a difference too.
2006-10-11 14:56:21 · answer #7 · answered by Cub6265 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd say that you are with someone you do not match.
This is a problem that has 3 answers.
1) You do as he asks and quit drinking.
2) He agrees it is your right to drink and he has to put up with it.
3) Both agree that this is not something either wants to budge on, and both go their own ways to find partners that have the same outlook on drinking.
Choose.
2006-10-11 14:58:15 · answer #8 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is a difference between a man trying to "change" a woman, and a man trying to NOT tolerate a drinker! Apparently you drink too much, and he doesn't want to put up with it! You might consider this, and modify your habits accordingly. Good luck.
2006-10-11 14:57:43 · answer #9 · answered by Life after 45 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If that's how he met & fell in love with you I don't see anything wrong with a drink every now & then. He needs to get over it, You would think he would rather you drink @ home than some where else.
2006-10-11 15:17:13 · answer #10 · answered by "B" 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋