What can be done to get wife and kids back in my life after a year and a half.?

Answer 1

Hmmm dude seems like u've not been good with ur responsibilities and took ur relationships for granted and when u talk of getting them back means u've experienced some eye opening things but it's taken u a lot longer to realise ur mistake in letting them go in the first place. I would suggest that u gain the lost trust somehow by doing things right not forcing them to come with u at all but try to b near to them and do things which will help ur wife and kids give them space as they have lived without u for a year and a half the most damage has already taken place so repairing it shud b ur first priority and thats possible only when u gain their trust and real trust dude u can't break it again then it will trully shatter their beliefs in future if u end up cheating or hurting them. Since ur kids and ur wife have known good life apart from u in the said period it will b somewat tough accepting u back in their lives but to achieve their love and trust u have to do the same love them unconditionally and trust them to the utmost b with them for them in whichever way they need u but don't try to impose urself on their life with force let them accept u gradually it's the only way u can gain their respect. Well if ur wife has taken a new lover then wat will u do? I hope she hasn't tho but if at all she has then it's a bit more dicey situation and all the more complicated u will still have to try and love her if u truly want her back not with force ofcourse coz it'll just so firm her belief more so that u r yet again being selfish in ur needs rather then thinking bout her needs and the kids need. Just plain b for them b with them for u care for them not just for ur selfish needs.
Try explaining ur wife and kids in a subtle way of ur past behaviour but don't force it so that they just have to accept it with half heart no point and no trust that way.
Since u've not mentioned the state of ur marriage I take it that u r divorced or ur marriage hasn't been legally terminated as yet...if so try and just b patient in achieving their trust...talk to ur kids coz if ur kids r too young they will surely ask why u left them in the first place but if they r teenagers it'll b a hard road for u coz by this age kids know many more things pertaining to adults and they know whoz good and whoz bad if they r with ur wife take it they will care for her more and not u coz u deserted them which means they have lost faith in u and they wud b hurt...all the more work u need to put in to gain their trust and faith back in u. EFFORT and PATIENCE is truly needed with lots of love from ur end to try getting them back in ur life.

Umm i assumed it was ur wife and kids u wanted to know bout but after i read ur question ur not even saying "My wife and kids" that "MY" word is so boldly missing i wonder if u r trully serious or ur asking help for someone other then urself ? well watever it is I hope whoever is in need gets help.

Answer 2

1

Answer 3

Court her 10x harder than you did to win her heart in the first place. This time, you have to be 100% sincere and have to PROVE to her that you are different, matured, changed, will do WHATEVER she desires. Put yourself at her mercy; allow her to decide, but be fully honest with her and yourself. If you know that there are some issues you haven't resolved, do so NOW and close that door - never to open again. If it's medical, get the help you need; if it's emotional, get the counseling you need (and see if she'll attend also?), if it spiritual, then find a strong Church that will back you up, give you the encouragement you need to be strong and help you fight for her & the kids.

Understand that the kids have incurred some damage, insecurities and anger issues at this point, so be ready for years of counseling for them to patch things up.

You have a long row to hoe. Don't give up. Persue her with all abandon - set aside your pride, do whatever is legally possible to re-start that flame in her heart. And NEVER EVER go back to the old habits that put you in divorce court in the first place!

Answer 4

I don't know your situation because you haven't explained it. But it depends on the situation. Obviously you have done something if you're trying to figure out how to get them back. But what you need to do is talk with your wife and resolve the issues you have and be willing to make the necessary changes. But if she's not willing to work it out with you than let it go. I don't know what she did or you did that you ended up at this point. Counseling might help to get an outside medium in the issue so you can try to make an attempt to get your family back.

Answer 5

I for one would never take my ex back after the way that he treated me for the last year and a half. No amount of begging would ever get me to trust him again.

Answer 6

You can't expect a decent answer if you don't provide a decently informative question.
I suspect you were at fault, but if you are sincere about getting your family back, you have to be willing to do the hard work that it takes, otherwise, dont waste their time or set them up for disappointment.

Answer 7

Be honest with the wife. Take things slow and talk to the wife

Answer 8

Pray and trsut that God will give you all you need to fulfill your desires.

You already know what it takes. It's on the inside of you already stop doubting it. Trust your instincts it is the same as God guiding you. Everything will be fine.

Answer 9

You are being a little vague. You need to explain why she's not in your life right now before some one can answer your question. Sorry

Answer 10

Kim Y - she tells it like it is!!
Good luck fella, family is the most important thing