Do you think parents have the right to go through your stuff in your own room?

Question

I think it's wrongfor a parent to go through your own private stuff..i don't know why they think it's right and my teacher says that it's always best cuz the parent is concerned but shouldn't they respect their privacy? if they are acting weird then yeah maybe but jus for fun i don't think so anyone feel me?

Answer 1

Heres what I did for my two children. I searched through nothing in their room. They were responsible for cleaning their room, so they never accused me of snooping. I did their laundry, and they found out quickly if they had something to hide, make sure it was'nt in their pants pockets.(that was fair game) I did'nt listen to phone calls and did'nt search their cars. I gave them their privacy and felt it unfair to invade it. My children turned out fine with no problems. They respect me because I respect them. On the other hand my husband was a little bit on the snoopy side and they remember that too. I would have snooped some if the children had given me reason not to trust them and thought they were doing something potentially harmful to themselves or others.

Answer 2

Frankly, I don't feel it's right for parents to go through your stuff in your room, unless they have some reason to be concerned; like drugs or alcohol or unusual behavior. If you are keeping a diary or something very personal, my suggestion is to find another place to hide it. I know this can be hard. I have been a teenager and I have been an adult. One time when I was a kid my younger brother read my diary when I wasn't around. I felt so invaded. If your parents seem to go into your room, I'd for the time being, make sure that the room has nothing in it that you'd want to hide. Then, after you find another place for your very personal things (like a diary)...after a while, they'll get bored looking in your room and they will stop. Even though you might be right in how you feel, the more you make a big deal about it, the more they'll think there is something of interest in there, even if there isn't. So create a place, somewhere...outside, in a backyard? Somewhere, where you can get a box with a lock on it. Then, enjoy this process, and don't tell anyone, not even your best friend. Not even! Can you keep a secret with yourself? This will actually help you feel like a stronger person.

Answer 3

This is a tricky question. Hopefully if a parent is going through a child's stuff they are doing so as a means of protecting their child and not just for the fun of it. Unfortunately some kids don't act weird and still get into drugs and other things that a parent needs to know about. While I think there needs to be a certain amount of respect between parent and child I think that a parent still has to dig sometimes just to make sure they really know what is going on in their child's life so they can protect them. Ultimately I think the question for any child is this...if something is so private that you don't want your parents to find it then is it really something that should be in your life?

Answer 4

That depends, how old are you? how many bills do you pay? until you pay a bill or become a parent, you have no idea. i felt the same way as a child, but now that i have a teenager, i understand why. I will remove the door off his room if i felt it was necessary. It is MY house, his name is not on the mortgage or any of the bills, I can do as I please.

Do i think parents should just go through their children's things for no reason, at any time they feel like it? No. They are entitled to some privacy. but do they have the right if that is their choice? yes it is, but what would probably happen is kids will just leave things they don't want they're parents to know about over their friends house, so it would defeat the purpose of checking the room. but dont worry, one day you (may) have kids and then your kids will feel the same about you.

as my mother said, "May you one day have a child just like you" the mother's curse works!!
blessings!

Answer 5

I think a child, espcially a teen does deserve a certain level of privacy. A parent shouldnt go through thier things just because they can. There should be a reason. Why make your child feel violated if they arent doing anything wrong?
Now, if the child suddenly changes or is acting strangely and there is cause for concern, then yes, a parent should attempt to find out whats going on.

Answer 6

Unfortunately, now a days parents are battling up against the pressures of all types of outside influences their children are bombarded with, and this is on a daily basis. A lot of parents don't even really have a relationship where there is a healthy dialog with their children, with that being said, unless you and your parents talk, and your parents know all of your friends, you are the type of child that keeps your word they haven't caught you in lies. Then you are right a parent has no reason to check your room and go through your private things; but if you are that opposite kid. Not to sound negative; but at that point a parent may want to know who they have living in their home that they pay the mortgage for.

Answer 7

Here's the thing, I am a parent and I have always tried to teach my children respect and the respect of other peoples privacy. I have always told them that only way I would go through there room is if they gave me a reason to. You can not teach a child to respect other peoples privacy, if you do not respect theirs. I also told them if they ever gave me reason to search their room that I would do it without notice or the blink of an eye, so if they wanted their privacy respected, then they needed to stay on the straight and narrow.

The other thing is that I do not do their laundry or clean their rooms, a part of respect and privacy is also a part of maturity and doing your own cleaning and laundry, so it does go both ways. You can not expect your parents to treat you as an adult if you do not act like one.

Answer 8

i am a parent and yes, I agree that kids should have privacy in their rooms........also depends upon the age. As young children there is usually no need to keep things private, but comes a certain age kids will keep diaries or begin to feel the need to private thoughts and personal items. So as a parent I respect the privacy of my children and they respect mine. However, if I felt that my children were hiding something that could possibly hurt them or others, then I would want to encourage them to come clean. But I don't go through their rooms unless they are there and we are cleaning out clutter. If they do come across something that is private to them, it remains private. Hope this answers your question, however, every parent is different, I just trust that my children always make smart choices.

Answer 9

Good question. My mother violated my privacy when I was 14...she went through my journal and I caught her and I immediately lost my trust and respect for her. But she stumbled across a lot of problems I was keeping to myself in that journal and she confronted me about it. Looking back, I think it was a good thing she found it...if she didn't, I know I wouldn't be here right now. I believe if you feel something is wrong with your child, (like if they are doing drugs, mood swings, etc.) and you see signs that something is not right, then you should look around. But if you're just being nosy for no good reason, then that's just an invasion of privacy and you're being a disrespectful parent. Only do it when you know something is truly wrong.

Answer 10

I think it is perfectly fine for a parent to go through their kid's stuff. They have a right to know, and if you aren't doing anything that you think your parents shouldn't know about it, then it wouldn't bother you as much.

Now, I do think there is a limit. Especially at certain ages - 16, 17, 18 --- I still think there should be some monitoring, etc. Younger than that - sorry, but I think it should be open season for a parent to dig into anything their kid is doing.

So IMs, emails, phone records, etc -- all open game. And if I'm paying for the services, doubly so.