Q 1.wait to have a second child?Q2. is it fair to my first(2yr old) to have a sibling or not?Q 3.if we wait a few years, is that fair to her?
2006-10-11 05:09:28 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Toddler & Preschooler
we are both 31
2006-10-11 05:32:47 · update #1
1. Yes
2, You should not have another child just so your 1st has a playmate
3. You do not have another child to be fair, you have another to add more love to a family...the difference in age should not matter.
2006-10-11 05:13:45 · answer #1 · answered by KathyS 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The first question you have to ask is are you going to be "financially stable" within a definite amount of time? I guess I don't know what "financially stable" means, if you are waiting until you have "extra' money", I don't think that exists; but if you mean you don't know how you are going to pay for food or a roof over your head, that's a different story. I wouldn't be so concerned about if it is "fair" to you first child unless it means you can't feed or cloth her if #2 comes along. My sister and I are 8 years apart (not because of financesl, but due to infertility reasons) it was kind of like being an only child while growing up but now as adults she & I are very close. I try focus more on raising my 2 sons (who are 3 1/2 yrs apart) as individuals, not as a team. If having #2 is going to be a primary source of stress, then I would say hold off and just be happy you have one child already. I don't think there is any easy answer.
2006-10-11 12:56:23 · answer #2 · answered by funrdhdpeach 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you feel it would be too great of a strain financially then you should wait. Don't worry about being fair to your first child. Is is fair for her to not have clothing and good food to eat, etc. Just love your kids no matter how many you have. I would say wait a little while. Kids are expensive. My kids are 4 years apart and I find that to be a good spacing. But if you really want another child now for you, and you can afford the basics then go for it. But if you decide not to have any more don't worry that you are being unfair to your first. You do not have to have siblings to have a good childhood.
2006-10-11 12:24:59 · answer #3 · answered by kat 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you don't have the money to raise two kids you should hold off on another baby for now it would be unfair to bring another child into a struggling house hold. Waiting a few yrs sounds like a good idea because she's only two give her some time with just the two of you before you bring another sibling into the house. I don't think it would be unfair to your first child but it may be a struggle for the entire house hold if your financially unstable. That's a big step approach it with caution and lots of care.
2006-10-11 12:22:00 · answer #4 · answered by Curious J. 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Truthfully, you are never financially ready for one child, let alone, a second. I say go for it because you will find a way to do it. Your other little one would probably love having a sibling, even though sometimes theres the jealousy issue. Thats the fun of teaching them to share and accept others in their lives. I say have babies now while you can because there are many out there that cannot have them. So enjoy your child bearing years.
2006-10-11 13:41:08 · answer #5 · answered by dinkle_fritz81 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would wait, that way you can afford better stuff for your first and not have to struggle with presents for holidays and clothes and all that stuff children require. Plus she is fine without another sibling some kids never have one, you can take her to the park to play with other kids. If you wait a while you might get some bills payed off and stuff.
Also not being fincially stable and having another baby could put a strain on the marriage.
2006-10-11 12:17:06 · answer #6 · answered by mellow_26241 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you wait until you are financially stable...you may not have anymore children. It's not a fairness issue, you will love any child you have equally and kids love their siblings. It's all a matter of choice.
2006-10-11 12:57:42 · answer #7 · answered by bctvmanz 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes you should have a child I waited 7 years to have another child because we were not financially stable and now my 8 year old is looking forward to having fraternal twins in April/07 too much time has gone and they will have nothing in common.
2006-10-11 12:20:22 · answer #8 · answered by Crystal F 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If time is not an issue (ie Biological Clock) then wait. If it is, then have one and adjust accordingly with another job, fewer expenditures, etc. Start with lowering your internet bill.
2006-10-11 12:18:11 · answer #9 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I f you're not finacially stably i would wait,cause you don't want stress with the person you care most about.(your partener)
2006-10-11 12:18:43 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋