Is four months long enough?

Question

I've been going out with a girl for four months now (officially) though we started dating six months ago. Long build-up. Anyway, things are going great. Really, really great. In fact, I've entertained thoughts that she might be "the one". We both know it's built to last in the medium to long term, but we haven't discussed marriage etc. I'm 26 and she's 24 and we don't feel old enough yet.
Even though it's going so well, I'm worried it might be too soon to think about the future like that. People talk about the 'honeymoon' stage, and I'm worried we're still going through it and maybe what we have will fade with time. But I can't help it. I can't see myself apart from her! Do you think 4 months is a long enough time to make decisions about the future? Am I still in the throes of new love? Or am I just thinking too much about all this?

Answer 1

I would hold off on the future plans. If you guys are meant for each other, then you'll stay together. Wait it out for a year or two and see where time takes you. If you're still feeling like this in the next year, then I'd say marry her. Just take it slow. You'll still be with her without the title and responsibility of marriage, so just enjoy this stage. Marriage will change everything, hopefully for the good, but if you guys havn't been with each other long enough, the step of marriage can be crippling.

Good luck man. Just take it slow. It sounds like you're really in love with this girl. I wish you guys the best. Take your time and you two will be fine.

Answer 2

you are not too young to consider the future, as many people are getting married now even at 20 or 21. I would definately wait til its been a year bthough. I felt that way about a few relationships in my life, but then the honeymoon stage ends anywhere from 1 month to a year down the road and things really change. Don't go through the expense of a ring and wedding until you are 100% sure!! because then you could have the expense of a nasty divorce! Do you live together? Some people don't believe in that, but this is the real way to see if you can stand to be with the person. Good Luck~

Answer 3

That's really really sweet. However I do think you should wait it out a little longer. I know some people who get married fast and have a great marriage... but I know far more who divorced less than two years into it. If it were me, I would give it at least another 6 months to a year, just to make sure that you know everything there is to know about her, and that you're able to cope with all situations together. If you need to question whether or not it's too early, then it probably is. Wait until you know without a shadow of a doubt that she's the one and then you won't have to live with any regrets.

Answer 4

4 months is probably still too early to actually get married or engaged, but go ahead and talk about it. There is still a lot of stuff that you may not know about your woman. Not saying that she is hiding stuff from you, but sometimes the real personality and feelings of a person don't come out for a long time. But you can talk about getting married... if you didn't think about the future then whats the point in being in a committed realationship with someone? Good luck and be careful!

Answer 5

no it's not enough time your bubble will pop, then you will see clearer. the feelings may still be there but then you have to ask the hard questions. if you are still considering this girl for marriage. are you financially suited does she believe what you believe about handling money, what about kids does she want any one two three, her career your career where do you want to live how do you plan on bring up the kids spanking no spanking what religion if any will you serve God or not questions questions question about life, have you lived enough to ask questions like these if not then put on the breaks cause she is younger than you so think think deep I'm sorry I just happen to be one of those people who treasures marriage and think ever after is not a fairy tale but it takes had work and a lot of grit and determination to get there. today people marry just to have legal sex. when the fun's over so is the marriage and that's sad

Answer 6

Time tells all. You may need to spend 3 years with someone to find out that they arent "the one". If you love her then yeah, continue dating. But don't rush into anything. 4-6 months i would say is a fairly new relationship. It's better not to rush into anything. Your obviously posting on here cause you have doubts about the whole situation. But that doesnt mean that you love her any less. Theres nothing wrong with taking your time and spending a couple years together before you decide on marriage. I mean, whether your married or not you just want to be with her right?

Answer 7

I would wait. You are still in that period where you cannot get enough of each other and you can't stop thinking about her. I would at least wait until after the holidays to even bring it up at all. She may be thinking the same thing. Or maybe drop little tiny hints about the future and read how he reacts. That is the only real way to see how she feels. My opinion is that it is too soon. Good luck.

Answer 8

4 months is a little too soon, you're still in the honeymoon stage. See if you guys can make it thru the terrible 2's before you make any decisions. A lot of relationships bomb out right around the 2 year mark. good luck and have fun! :)

Answer 9

i am 26 and i have been married for 6 years so i was 20 when we got married
so age is not a big factor but are you ready lots of thing to take in to mind how long how you been living on your own ? what do mom and dad think they know you both the best ? and do you want to spend the rest of your life that this one or do you just like the idea? of it all would if she becomes disabled will you just leave her ?
with all that said put aside you need to talk to a marriage counselor some one who really knows what they are doing

Answer 10

Every relationship is different... 4 months is perfect for some, too long or too short for others... you are old enough to be married... you should talk about the future, truly, it isn't like talking about marriage today means wedding tomorrow, talking about it prepares you for it... marriage is a serious vow/promise... you should be discussing alot of things, so that you are both aware of what the other person wants.. and to see if you are right for each other.