I dated a guy for about 2 years and was physically abused for about 18 months. Its been about 6 months now since I've seen him becuase he moved to his Dad's house. Its been 4 months since I last spoke to him. I finally said **** it and over 2 days I had 326 missed calls from him. That was the last time he tried to contact me. I went through a time when I hated him and didn't even want to think of him existing. But recently he has been the only thing on my mind. It's true some of the time I went through hell with him, but other days were best experiences of my life. I want to call him and just see what he's up to and if his transition went smoothly. What should I do? Can abusive guys change for the better?
2006-10-11 04:36:53 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Typical girl mentality. NO. guys dont change, period. Some lie, and you think theyve changed but, they never change for anyone. If he abused you, he will surely do it again, and more to the point, if you think you had some of the best experiences with this abusive guy, its only because anything seems wonderful compared with getting slapped around. If you let him back into your life, he will know he is the strength and you are the weakness. I recommend you get some self esteem and go call some other guy who wont treat you like garbage.
2006-10-11 04:41:50 · answer #1 · answered by man_hands542 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
the best thing to do is move on and forget about it. The reason you miss him is cause you keep thinking of the good times and miss that, but you need to weigh it out. There is a reason you left him, and you have to be strong.
I know exactly how you feel, I went through the same thing with my ex. I missed him so much even though he was also abusive, but I knew no matter what he would never be good for me. Its too hard to forget about what you went through because of them. I think people change, but they never change much.
2006-10-11 04:43:35 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't do it. You need to get out and meet other people. You will fall in love again. This man has problems. If you feel you are co-dependent on him, seek therapy. Just don't EVER make contact with him again.
You may also try reading some books or searching the Internet for topics on self-esteem. He may have lowered yours during the abuse. You need to learn to love yourself and see how wrong being with him is.
2006-10-11 04:42:10 · answer #3 · answered by grudgrime 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no! stay as u r....ur doing alot better having him not around. I know u feel like evyerthing will be ok if u get back together with him but thats not the case things might be good for awhile also known as the honeymoon phase but they will just turn to s h i t all over again ur better then that and they dont chnage their ways eveer i know from expereince!
2006-10-11 04:41:50 · answer #4 · answered by lolli_pop69_2001 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yeah what will it take
just call him make sure ur phone number is block so he doesnt call u and stalks u
an abusive man or person could change
there s only 2 things u need to find out if he has change
did he seek help for problem like therapy
also iif he show consistent apporiate behavior
good luck and give him a call
2006-10-11 04:41:10 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, chances are he will not change. If you call him, you might get a weak apology and and an excuse to get back with him-- and then he's going to start abusing you again. So i suggest you leave things the way they are, do NOT call him, and try to move on with your life..
2006-10-11 04:41:27 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
If he was such a good guy why did he hit you. Never ever get back with the peice of s**t.
Women who get back usally get killed one night. The signs are there that he isn't the right person for you. Remember you can not change a person
2006-10-11 04:45:52 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You said "HE PHYSICALLY ABUSED YOU FOR 18 MONTHS" and you are wondering if you should call this guy. You need SERIOUS HELP.
2006-10-11 04:47:59 · answer #8 · answered by Monty L 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
some can but some can't. if you want to know that bad then call him, but be clear that you don't want to get back with him. abusive or not he should not have hurt you physically
2006-10-11 04:41:34 · answer #9 · answered by Ismael Q 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
your interest in going back to an abusive rrelationship indicates the damage he's done to your esteem; seek counseling if you can and do NOT go back. If you do, you'll have no one to blame but yourself.
2006-10-11 04:40:00 · answer #10 · answered by drumrb0y 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋