As parents, how do you feel about every behavior issue being called a "disorder"?

Question

I'm really concerned in the big society fad of every behavioral problem being labeled as some sort of "disorder". Kids who used to be active or hyper are ADD or ADHD (or both), someone who has been through a lot is labeled PTSD, a child who used to be called strong-willed is now ODD.... does labelling your child with a DISORDER give him/her the wrong message - that there is something WRONG with them? I think most of these things are very normal and everyday part of life and growing up. Or, worse yet, are these disorders all a tag to excuse ill mannered children and allow them wreck havoc everywhere they go? That isn't a great answer either.... ....any helpful thoughts?

Answer 1

They told me my oldest son had adhd i refused the meds and stuck to a healthy diet and lots of exercise and a good routine and posted rules and consequences after about 6 months i had a pretty well rounded boy on my hands , i think if the parent is lazy and turns to the Mead's it's because they don't want to be bothered in helping their child. I say 1 % of kids who take meds for "disorders" actually need it , the other 99% NO !!

Answer 2

Well, when I was 16 I was labeled with Oppositional Defiance Disorder. I mean HELLO, what freaking teenager wouldn't be?! And my parents used every opportunity to shove that in my face, like it gave them an automatic "I'm right and you're crazy so shut up and do what I say" card to play. Yes I was diagnosed as this, but what the therapist/doctor guy didn't look at was how messed up my parents are and that my father has a personality disorder and controlled the whole family through manipulation of guilt and attacks on our emotions! Who wouldn't get sick of that crap and start telling them to F-off?! Anywho, I have an 8 month old daughter and am married and I'm a grown-up now, and I couldn't ever do something like that to my daughter. I know I took the first step to being a good parent by being READY to be a good parent and make sure I have a solid marriage. I don't agree with all these diagnoses coming from doctors and KIDS being put on medications. NO child should be put on medication until at least age 17-18 unless they will die or lose mental/physical capacity without them. I once knew a 10 year old girl that was on Lithium for Bipolar Disorder. Um, hello, did they even look at the fact that her parents were both crappy parents that drank and fought all the time and were never consistent?! No wonder she was so up and down and angry. Killing her poor little developing brain and body was just a quick fix to make her easier to deal with for her parents. If you ask me, in that case it should have been considered child abuse. I have seen her since the age of ten, when she was 16. She does not look good at all, that medication is destroying her.

Answer 3

I think it is a bunch of BS, 40 or 50 years ago you would have never heard of the labels they put on children now. I do think however that 90% of the problem is lack of discipline in children, they have no respect for their parents because the parents are too lazy to smack their butts a couple of times to get the kids attention when they are told to do something or not to do something. The time out thing don't work, and the 1 2 3 counting don't work, kids learn at a very early age just how far they can push their parents and get away with it.

All the different labels they are giving kids is just making the drug companies richer, and the drugs prescribed aren't good for the childrens health in the long run.

Answer 4

I agree with you. I think there are so many excuses out there, and tons of medicating out there. Where did these disorders come from? Why is the world in more turmoil now than they were before these disorders came recognised? I do think there are such disorders, BUT i also think they are quickly diagnosed and dismissed. I think the real problem lies in the fact that a lot of home HAVE to have a dual income, which leads to the children suffering from the lack of dicipline, and attention. I am not calling down on dual income families.... i blame society on a whole, This world has gone crazy. I am soooo lucky to be able to be a stay at home mom, but my husband has a great income. But that is not always the case, and now the way rent and housing is, who can survive on single income?(sorry...got off topic there)

Answer 5

For a child to be diagnosed with a disorder they have to meet very specific criteria. The label is there to help know what the treatment should be. It's the same as if you have cancer, you are given the label so that people know which trearment to follow. It doesn't mean that there is anything wrong with the child. It's not an excuse for people to act out. Also, it's important to have a child diagnosed by someone who has the authority too, like a clinical psychologist. Some pediatricians or teachers will use a label, but they are not qualified to do so.

Answer 6

I think that it's 50% of the time a real "disorder", and 50% of the time it's unsuccessful parenting. The trouble is that it's hard to distinguish petween the two unless you are a professional.
I have Bipolar Disorder, which is a serious psychiatric illness, and wasn't diagnosed until 24 b/c the teachers, guidance counselors and my parents thought I was "a victim of my own intelligence" and I was dumb enough to listen to them... I've been on meds for a few years for it now and they have made my life much easier.
Basically, you're about half right. The other half needs to learn how not to make hasty generalizations about other people...

Answer 7

Well, I don't have any helpful thoughts.......but I have been saying the same thing for years now!!! So I agree with you 100%. What happened to a kid just being a hyper crazy kid with too much energy??? Why does it have to be a "disorder" that means they have to be drugged up 24/7??

Growing up I had "Selective Mutism Disorder". Still do... but, really, what was wrong with it just being called "shy"? LOL. I never took any meds for it and I was bothered all the time in school by my outgoing classmates... "why dont you ever talk?" "do you even know how to talk?" etc etc (which really do NOT help a shy person... it actually makes them feel embarassed or stupid) but anyway... yeah, just wanted to share my personal experience.

Answer 8

The criteria people have to meet to qualify for various disorders is not "very specific" by any stretch of the imagination. Check the DSM-IV-TR or ICD-9/ICD-10 at some point. It's very broad, actually, as with any language, the language presented in either manual is subject to interpretation and what an individual may feel meets the criteria, and what that individual doctor may be receiving from the pharmaceutical industry for prescribing certain medications.

This isn't to say that PTSD, ADD, ADHD, ODD, etc. don't exist... I firmly believe they do - But not in the quantities which are diagnosed. All too often other areas are neglected for a "quick fix" that may or may not work because the problem may or may not be the diagnosed issue. This comes from personal experience. Depakote, paxil, lithobid, trizadone, etc. isn't going to help a girl that's having behavioral problems due to a hormonal disorder. I was later declared misdiagnosed after demanding a full evaluation be preformed by an independent doctor. My problems had nothing to do with an unprovable imbalance in my brain. It had everything to do with a provable imbalance of estrogen. Too many people jump on the ODD/ADHD/Depression band wagon without first reviewing the individual for other factors which may be not only easier to treat, but safer to treat as many anti-depressants, anti-psychotics, and so forth, can damage your heart, brain, and liver in inappropriate doses.

Just another touch on my personal experience. I was 15, my usual psychiatrist was leaving for maternity. Previously, we had taken her the results of the testing which I demanded, she conceded that medication was inappropriate for me and thought it would be best to gradually take me off. The medicines listed above are only 4 of 6 which I was on at the time. Neurontin was another, and I can't remember the name of the 6th.To come off them all at once, cold turkey, could very well have killed me. She gave me applicable instructions, and informed me to follow them to the letter and we rescheduled for a month later.

By this time labor had been induced, and she was out on maternity. I visited with another psychiatrist, my mother and I spoke with him about what the previous psychiatrist had decided to go ahead and do.... and I left with a handful of scripts for the full, original doses of the drugs I was on and told it would not be a good idea for me to discontinue them, regardless of what my mother thought, I thought, and the previous psychiatrist thought. Needless to say, we never went back.

Answer 9

I think there's something wrong with all of us.
I hate the labels, outside of clinical use. But the labels are very effective in demonstrating the numbers, which is a relief to teachers and parents, and often, the child.
I think the most important thing is not using any label as an excuse. That's how adults need to be, and that's how children should be raised -- with accountability!
Some of it, I believe is genetic, and much of it is a failure to be consistent on the part of the parents.

Answer 10

I felt alone in Christianity and that I wasnt good enough ever no matter what, then I had a girlfriend who was a wiccan and so I got into that and I felt like I was hitting something I had along time ago when I was younger, I always believed in the Old Gods but I sorta always thought that they were gone but thanks to the gf I was able to come back to them. Now I am a Heathen, proud Asatruar, and have felt like I have finally found where I am meant to be, it was a great feeling like I had been freed from everything but as though I had been put into something that fit me perfectly and my soul basicly jumped in joy. I have always felt like Tyr was the one who wanted me, but Freyr seems to be more present and easy to converse with I have also seen symbols of his such as particular animals in dreams just before big events. So I am unsure yet which is the one that I will end up with being mostly devoted too. But none the less its a great feeling when you feel youve come home basicly, I have really changed alot since becoming devoted.