a friend of mine was seeing this guy,He asked her if she wanted kids ?she said yes ,but only if it was someone she was married too.but,she stated that she wasn't on birthcontrol but do use condoms.she also said that if the condom broke or whatever the case maybe and became pregnant she would keep it b/c she felt as though it was meant to be.and also she don't believe in abortions.she said the guy said he was okay with that ,he respected the fact she was being honest with him.well it happened condom came off ,she became pregnant .she told the guy she was pregnant he wanted her to get an abortion, she didn't . she is six months ,he said he didn't want anything to do with her or the baby .a couple of days later the jerk showed up with a few bags of pampers, a couple cans of powered milk and she hasn't seen or heard from him since.I told her that it's gonna hurt like hell b/c he left to raise a baby by herself ,but, let him go eventually he'll be back . was i wrong for telling her that?
2006-10-10 15:45:23 · 8 answers · asked by phillygirl 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Other - Pregnancy & Parenting
I've looked at the questions you've been asking on here and I think that you're really really worried about this situation. You're right it sucks-big time. It's unfair that it's happened and the guy's awful for doing this. But there's no guarantee at anytime that people are going to take responsibility for their actions. So although you and your friend might both want to believe he's coming back, there's just as much of a chance that he won't. Besides, unless she really loves him and wants to raise her baby with him, perhaps it would be better to look towards a future with her baby and a man who will really want to love her and her child and not just be there out of obligation or guilt.
It's better to stand by your friend, listen to her, support her and love her. You can't make things right for her no matter how much you'd like to, but it sounds like she needs some help and support and a hug. She might also need time away from her baby sometimes. It's hard enough being a parent of a baby without being a solo parent. Maybe you could offer to watch her wee one for short periods of time so your friend can have a break?
2006-10-12 13:10:45 · answer #1 · answered by Shoshanna 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
men the daft beggers! thy come around to the idea of having a baby much differently to a woman if he's any kind of bloke he will step up to the plate and help take care of the baby, he sounds like he's taking that step now, but the two of you need to sit down (maybe over macdonalds?) and chat about the future and what you both would like to come from having the baby congrats and good luck either way the baby will have a fantstic mummy :)
2016-03-28 04:21:28 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was wrong to tell her that he would come back because he may not. I was in a similar situation and I finally got to the point where I needed people to tell me that I was better than him and that I could raise this baby with out him in the picture. My daughter is 6 now and hasn't seen or hear from her "sperm donor" in 5 years. THANK GOD!
2006-10-10 15:52:47 · answer #3 · answered by Tammy 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yep. He may never come back. If he's a real man, he would have stayed in the first place.
She and the baby are better off without him. There are plenty of real men out there who will love a baby because he loves the baby's mother. She won't have to spend the rest of her life alone just because she has a kid.
2006-10-10 16:10:58 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You need to be a friend and just be there for her and listen to her. You can not predict the future.
And if you want to be realistic - look at statistics, they don't come back.There are alot of single moms out there.. alone.Unfortunately that is the case.Give her alot of support, be the partner for her that she does not have and should not expect to have. your just building her up for a big let down
2006-10-10 15:57:00 · answer #5 · answered by loladoreen 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
will he come back i don't know either he got scared , cold feet or he is a real butt head . either way doesn't your friend want someone reliable to help her raise her child.i raised my daughter by myself for 5 years . met a great guy married him have another child he doesn't treat them any different he loves , supports and plays with them alike . don't wait for anyone go on with your life and enjoy that baby , that's what u have to tell her
2006-10-10 15:56:07 · answer #6 · answered by inna357 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think she'll be better off without him; he sounds like an ***. She should go to court and get child support, though, so she isn't completely on her own.
2006-10-10 16:20:12 · answer #7 · answered by K-Rex 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
it depends on the man, she may see him again, may not, no one can answer that question but him and god, also she should use the pill and next time she won't have to deal with this
2006-10-10 15:48:47 · answer #8 · answered by rye252000 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋