If a guy says he has been burned before, so he cannot say "I love you," for fear of getting burned again, does that make any sense? Does it mean he's commitment shy?
2006-10-10 15:19:07 · 22 answers · asked by schweetums 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Of course we don't say it. We skirt around the issue, try to avoid it, try to be cool about it, try to be subversive about it. We ask your friends, our friends, people around us if you feel the same way or not. We try our hardest to say it without ever saying it.
Or alternatively we have a cynical view of love and don't think that it exists or can be given so freely. We hope that love means something more than this. We don't want to say it because we don't think those few words matter.
Or we're completely horrible human beings and don't truly want to be in a relationship, so we stop short of hitting rock bottom and real connection. We don't want you to feel so connected and bound to us that we won't be able to let go. We don't view the relations in the same light you do.
Overall, look at our actions- if how we handle ourselves, how we speak to others about you, how we speak to others in front of you, how we speak to you in front of others, how we treat you, how we act and talk. If all of these signs honestly point to love, then that means that love is there.
2006-10-10 15:24:58 · answer #1 · answered by Skop 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Once bitten, twice shy. If a guy has been hurt before, it's human nature to be cautious the second time around.
If you have a good relationship, be patient. It will be worth it. Don't make him rush or feel pressured, it'll only create stress and tension.
2006-10-10 22:21:16 · answer #2 · answered by Hunter J 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think every guy has been hurt before but they usually get over it. Every girl is not the same. Maybe the time isn't write to say "i love you" which means he's not over her or the relationship.
2006-10-10 22:30:43 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think it would mean we are commitment shy, really it is for fear of being rejected.
2006-10-10 22:23:32 · answer #4 · answered by mr_law93 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
na he is not commitment shy..its just that he is hurt n need some time cuz he just doesn’t wanna go through the pain again...I guess he just wants 2 make sure that ur not gonna hurt him... n people who r hurt once, alwz wanna take their time.. i think its more of an trust issue..he'll come around once he feel that u do love him. time is all he needs...
2006-10-10 22:23:27 · answer #5 · answered by ArabianNite 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he's been burned, once or twice, (and I have) it's hard to say it, but we eventually say it, if it's true. But it is basicallyl, the fear that you credited it, too. So you see, men and women arn't that different.
2006-10-10 22:21:48 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
For myself,...after having felt 'burned'....after having said 'I love you' many times to a woman whom decided she was in love with someone else...I felt foolish at having said the words so many times to someone whom I didn't actually know didn't love me back.
....So the words 'I love you' lost their meaning to me. They're an easy way to express an emotion, but they are also words easily used dishonestly. It means he doesn't trust the 'words',...it doesn't mean he doesn't love the person....he might choose the way he says 'I love you' through more reliable means, like taking care of her, paying attention, listening, kissing and doing things for her that no body else would. There's millions of ways to say 'I love you' without opening your mouth....and most of them are far more reliable in determining the value of love expressed.
2006-10-10 22:35:18 · answer #7 · answered by markus 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
not really
hes jus afraid of being hurt
although he might feel those feelings
he doesnt express them
he's not really commitment shy i wouldnt say, because he's still with you, he will still commit, he jus might not speak his mind as often as before (if he gets hurt)
2006-10-10 22:20:56 · answer #8 · answered by Nick723 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I tell my girlfriend every day.
Whenever I see her, whenever we leave eachother, whenever we hang up, and when we say goodnight.
I love her, and I make sure she knows it.
I've been hurt a lot before.
It took me a while to get over my first time getting hurt.
Give him his time, and if he really does love you, he'll get over his past experiences and tell you.
2006-10-10 22:26:10 · answer #9 · answered by godathonone 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Guys tend to wait for the girls to say it because they are scared of getting there heart broken.
2006-10-10 22:21:11 · answer #10 · answered by kat 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋