6 Year Old Acts Like 4 Year Old?

Question

My six year old daughter acts like a four year old most of the time. She is continually having temper tantrums and has gotten fixated lately on getting a talking baby doll (which I have told her over and over we are not getting). She is extremely stubborn and wants to get her own way. I don't believe in corporal punishment but do stand my ground with her but still she is unbelievably stubborn and wails like a four year old when life is not going her way. She's been seeing a therapist as she is also going through her mother having left and seeing her irregularly. A psychiatrist has put her on some medication for ADD but she still acts up. I really want for her to start to grow emotionally but it seems as though she wants to be a four year old -- even calling me Dada instead of Daddy sometimes.

Any ideas on what I can do to help her grow emotionally?

Answer 1

maybe when she has temper tantrums, you can just ignore them. do it until she gets the point.

Answer 2

i'll let everyone else answer the add/stubbornness stuff, but all I have to say is.......

she is only 6 years old......... some kids just mature faster or slower than the others, there is nothing wrong with that............ and what is so wrong about her getting a talking baby doll? dolls are for little girls, surely at 6 years old she hasnt out grown baby dolls! do you expect her to ask for makeup and clothes instead? maybe some of those trampy looking "Bratz" dolls? heck nowadays i'd be grateful if i had a 6 year old who is happy being a 6 yr old instead of trying to act all grown up........Parents these days are in such a hurry to get their kids to grow up so soon!

if she likes dolls let her play with them, i wouldnt worry about it, maybe she is getting defiant because she feels she cant be herself, which wouldnt be a surprise, thats something you really need to teach her, that its okay to be herself, that she doesnt have to be like everyone else etc, as long as she isnt harming anyone.......

you want her to grow emotionally, but how can she grow when she is being suppressed so much? and medication for ADD, I'm not even going to get into the problems that can cause............

as a note i'm not saying all this in response to the tantrums part, just got riled up over the doll thing and the 6 yr old acting like 4 thing....

Answer 3

Well first of all, get her off the drugs. You can't properly parent a medicated kid. Some of the medications for ADD are known to cause behavioral issues. And every drug has a side effect, so you really don't know what that might do to her brain development either.

Second, you're bigger than she is. I mean, really. You're the adult. You're bigger, you're smarter, and you've been here longer. You don't have to explain to a 6-year old why "no" means NO. That's it. If she throws a tantrum, walk away. And no one says you can't give her a whack across the butt now and then if she really deserves it. She's calling you "Dada?" Don't respond to it. Tell her you only respond to "Dad" or "Daddy." I'm telling you, you can outwit this kid. And right now she's in charge, she knows she's in charge, and she's loving every minute of it!

Answer 4

Well she is still having temper tantrums because they obviously work to some degree. You might want to check out a tape or DVD called MAGIC 1-2-3. You can borrow it from your local library. This will definately help you. It tells you what things to ignore and what you should give her a time out for and how to handle certain situations without getting emotional/yelling etc...
It even shows situations acted out so you can see how to deal with certain behavior issues. This tape/DVD is great! You can use it as early as 2 years old I think.

Answer 5

It sounds a bit like my daughter who likes to throw tantrums every now and then. She will show me her black face when i reject her request. I will not show her any concern over these cos i know she will not understand. When she did something right, i commend her in front of others until she is very proud, she will continue to be a good girl for the next few days. (she is 8yrs old this yr)

Answer 6

Well...Of course, you haven't and shouldn't or ever start abusing her.
[Thank god you don't.]
But, yeah, ignore the temper tantrums, and if she wants her way, just give her a lecture, and tell her like "[name here] doesn't revolve around you, hunny. You have to understand that you don't always get what you want and you'll have to deal with it. That's the way life goes this time of year, and the whole century. Sorry,"
Something like that.
My dad ALWAYS gave me lectures, and I'm 16, and still crying when something special to me I don't get it, or it goes wrong.
Yet, he tells me to get back together, and work.

Answer 7

Please get her off the drugs, they should only be a last resort if all else fails. Try this website www.fedup.com.au it's all about how foods can effect behaviour and moods in children. Good luck and remember she is 6 not 16. Let her be a little girl as she will grow up before you know it.

Answer 8

reward her for acting like a 6 year old, when she acts like a four year old, just tell her we cant go to the movies, that is for 6 year olds, they dont let baby 4 year olds in the movies.

When she acts like a big girl tell her she she is such a big girl.

Answer 9

having similar problems with our 6yr grandson....his teacher said something key( when things are not going his way he sits under his desk) she said "she has never seen a 10yr old do this" so this too will pass.....I make sure he gets enough sleep and attention like reading books to him and outside activities,put her in situations where there are children her own age she will learn from them and don't worry so she'll be fine

Answer 10

well she is 6right??she is still a little girl!!!!let her be young!!!chances are once she is 13 u will wish she was still the lil 6year old girl:)every1 is different...chances are she will soon get out of this stage!good luck