Dealing With An Alcoholic?

Question

My BF is an alcoholic. He admits to it. The good part (if you can call it that) he always drinks at home, NEVER drives, holds a good job, is an excellent employee and is the sweetest man ever when he's sober.
The bad part is having to watch him self destruct, ruin his health, we can never go anywhere at night because he is drunk and sometimes when he's drunk he starts fights that turn into MAJOR battles.
I know that it's the alcohol that makes him act this way, but at times I really can't deal with it.

I know they have groups for alocoholics, but does anyone know of a group to help me deal with an alcoholic BF?

Thanks to all! I have found it and planning to attend a meeting this Sat with a beginners group.

Answer 1

I believe that the group Alanon is for families & friends of alcoholics.

Answer 2

U R not going 2 like this but UR indirectly allowing him 2 continue this self-destructive drinking. He's drinking regardless of the pain inflicted on U & the damage 2 himself.
Make an appointment with a GP/MD & ask 4 support/advice.
They should at least point U in the right direction.
He has 2 want 2 do this 2, if not.
U need 2 tell him, it's the alcohol or U.
He can't continue 2 have both.

Answer 3

Al Anon is what you need. I went through this with my first husband. It took me several times to find the right group for me. The first group I attended, the people had been meeting together for a long time. They were all talking about what they were doing for themselves. One was going back to school, someone else was doing this & that. No one was talking about their a**hole husbands and how drunk & rotten they were. I didn't understand that Al Anon teaches you how to get off the merry go round of enabling the alcoholic to continue negatively affecting your life and the lives of others. It was a long time before I went back. When I did go back, I went to a different group. It was a " beginners" Al Anon, and they really helped me to understand how I needed to stop letting him push my buttons. Long story short, I slowly began to learn to take the focus off his drinking, and to take care of myself and my children. I eventually left him because all of my crying, pleading, cajoling, and manipulating had no effect on him quitting drinking. It's been 16 years and he is still drinking and drugging to this day. I know I made the right move for me and my kids. I'm not telling you to leave him; but you do need help in dealing with his self destructiveness. Whether or not you choose to live with this disease will be your decision. Just know that you are not alone and there is Al Anon to help you get through it. Best wishes.

Answer 4

Yes, it's called Al-Anon. It is for relatives and loved ones of alcoholics, to help them cope with their own problems, and to help them help (or at least not hurt) their alcoholic loved one. Mostly it's a question of not making excuses for him, not facilitating his drinking and just being there for him with the obvious interest in his staying sober that you convey in ways subtle enough not to make it sound like a threat to leave him if he does not sober up.

Never make a threat like that unless you are prepared to follow through. Otherwise, it adds up to permission to continue his self-destruction. Simply tell him, flat out, that you think his best bet would be to go to AA, to sober up, and to take the problem seriously before his health and social and economic life is all shot. Don't do anything which constitutes approval, but don't be forever stating your disapproval, which is the old "she drives me to drink with her nagging" routine, and you don't want to get into that.

Answer 5

The group for him is Alcoholics Anonymous. There may be meetings everywhere, but until he's ready to walk into one, you cant help him/
You should consider going to Al-anon meetings (easily found on line and 411 on phone) In these meetings, people like yourself learn to deal with living with an alcoholic.
Not that my advice counts for anything, but if I were you, I'd leave. Until he wants to get better, things will only get worse for you.

Answer 6

Yes! Absolutely!

http://www.al-anon.alateen.org/

Answer 7

Try to talk to him try not to seem judgmental, and be calm. Try to compromise if he drinks every day see if he'll only drink on Friday-Sunday and gradually reduce the days or talk to some one that he listens to about his problem. If that doesn't work try to get him into a group and attend sessions with him and talk while the session is happening so he knows how his addiction is also harming you. Good Luck , i hope it works out.

Answer 8

The BEST thing for you to do is get out of the relationship.. It can be a ‘sobering” moment and if he truly cares more about you than the bottle he will quit cold turkey.. And if not he will NEVER change.. Drinking is a choice, so he needs to chose..

Answer 9

If he drinks back he will fall back into alcoholic eating proper away. you need to tell him that if he needs you to stay with him he needs to no longer in easy terms get sober he additionally needs to decide for help like say AA conferences. So if he starts off eating back and rejects your enter i think of i could pass away, it can be a) the main suitable concern which you will risk-free your self and b) he needs to no longer desire eating extra. in case you have been to stay at an identical time as he starts off eating back you may enable him. and you may sense tremendously depressing your self. If his love for you is extra advantageous than his habit he will decide for some kind of help, whether it might desire to come from interior himself. good success!

Answer 10

Have the same problem but with a drug addict. It does seem to be a loseing street and I know it hurts to see someone you love hurting the both of you sure there are places but don't know of any off hand good luck to both of you,think one of the places you may be thinking of is alanon.