we had been together for 5yrs, but we broke up cuz he cheated on me. we decided not to talk with each other two weeks ago, but he showed up in my apt last weekend. it's really hard not to think about him, but i think i deserve a much better person.
how can i forget him? i can't go out or do anything. i just sit and cry..
2006-10-10 09:36:48 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
First, know that time is the only true cure for heartache. Time heals all wounds. Cliche? Sure, but very very true.
Second, eliminate all the evidence of him, in your emails, pictures, friends, places, etc. You don't have to throw away the memorabilia just yet, but grab a box and dump all his reminders into it. It'll be really sad and difficult, but after wards you'll feel accomplished and stronger. Put that box away until you're ready to throw it out. Go through your inbox, do search with his name, and put all emails into a folder separate from your regular inbox, so you won't randomly open something that will strike up feelings.
Finally, forget all the things he did that were nice and good memories. Forget them! Reminiscing over them is pointless. The guy cheated, he threw all that away and negated any dignity he held with you in the past. Consider it all BS. When you find yourself starting to idealize him, remember what he did to you, how he hurt you, how he left you, etc. Acknowledging that he is the JERK he has proved himself to be.
In the meantime, keep yourself busy. Invite friends over every day, even to just sit with you. Each day, week, hour will get better with time. In the meantime, make it easier for yourself by taking a bit of my own advice.
Remember, it only has to work out ONE time. Only once!
2006-10-10 09:49:50 · answer #1 · answered by Miss smarty pants 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I feel your pain. I'm currently in the same situation. When I moved to NC back in July; I realized that I wasn't over my ex - even though I knew that he didn't deserve me. So, I've given myself permission to grieve. My grieving process ends in Nov. before the holidays.
When you've been together that long, it's hard to let go. But, this fool cheated on you!!! You're not losing anything by walking away.
So, cry your tears and move on!
2006-10-10 17:48:40 · answer #2 · answered by tazzydennis 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Think of the breakup as a break-over. Get a break-up buddy. Go to your local bookstore and get "It's Called a Break-Up Because It's Broken" by Greg and Amiira Behrendt (I think that's how you spell it). I was with my ex for 2 1/2 years, and reading that book helped me. I know, it seems stupid a book helps? Great tips though.
This break-up is an opportunity to give your life a makeover, take full advantage of it!
2006-10-10 16:41:20 · answer #3 · answered by GLSigma3 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be strong, Never look back, You are better off with out him at least you don't have to deal with him now. And he cant hurt you any More. Five years is a long time and tells me that you don't deserve what he did to you.
2006-10-10 16:41:04 · answer #4 · answered by Alisha 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have a steadfast rule: EX'S ARE EX'S FOR A REASON... you left for a reason.. has it changed?? no ?? well then what the heck are you thinkin girl? time heals all and time passes quickly when we are busy.. so .. get busy.. girl and have some fun!
2006-10-10 16:50:33 · answer #5 · answered by kickazz 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
go out and play, greet the brand new day. time will heal u, but it wouldnt hurt for you to find a new man
2006-10-10 16:44:58 · answer #6 · answered by amc3480 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋